A long time ago, a couple of guys came upon a tobacco plant, and one suddenly suggested, "Let's roll it up, light it on fire, and stick it in our mouths! It'll be fun!" And they all did what he said, because, back then, they probably thought crazy people had magical powers or something. If there's one thing I learned from history, it's that people from a long time ago were really, really stupid. After some initial coughing, people soon found that smoking could be fun and made you cool among your peers. Thus they started huge conglomerates and created cartoon characters to sell cigarettes to children. Later, though, it was found that inhaling large amounts of smoke is bad for you, and everyone acted surprised to hear this. It was then determined that people choosing to smoke was the biggest problem facing mankind, much more so than war, human rights violation, and starvation. Thus lawyers were dispatched to sue the tobacco companies for billions of dollars, hoping to get a large cut of it for themselves since being an agent of Satan is solely a commission job. And there was much kung fu fighting. Now smokers have been relegated to increasing smaller areas, though, during their frequent smoke breaks, they plot revenge - hopefully using a plan that doesn't involve much jogging.