July 20, 2009 – o has been in power for 6 months.
July 21, 2009 – Fox News reports the world may end tomorrow.
July 22, 2009 – Longest Solar Eclipse of the century.
July 23, 2009 – Thursday. Nothing good every happens on a Thursday.
I’m glad we went to see Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince while there was still time.*
God (to the Israelite males): “I want all of you to get circumcised!” The Israelite males: “But Lord, what is circumcised?” God: “Just hack a little hide off the end of your pecker and no back talk!” Some people claim God is a female entity, circumcision goes a long way towards making this point.
Well, we could always go back to the original motto of “E Pluribus Unum” (from many, one.) Or make it “In God Some of Us Trust” so the ‘Us’ or the ‘We’ includes more than just theists.
Well, except that plenty of cultures do it. Plenty of cultures cut off large portions of the female genitalia as well. Some cultures split open the penis (called sub-incision). Some cultures tie up their baby girls feet. Some cultures jam a big hunk of wood through their bottom lip. Some cultures knock a tooth out with a big rock. Some cultures make deep cuts all over a persons body and pour ash into the wounds.
These are things you think prove God’s existence? I think they prove the cruel side that all humans have inside.
If you want to believe in a God that tells you to cut off sensitive, healthy, functional, erogenous genital tissue from infants who cannot say no to the procedure….
..well, I don’t have to say what I think of that, but I bet you can guess.
Excess skin that boys couldn’t clean properly, so their doohickees were always getting infected. Don’t get me started about the spiritual side. Abraham believed God and it was accounted to him for righteousness.Because he BELIEVED, he OBEYED. Suit yourself, freewill is a gift of God too. Also gives you the rope to hang yourself, if you so choose.
Abraham was 99 years old when he was circumcised. (Gen. 17:1)
Less than a year later his son Isaac was born. (Gen. 21:1-2)
Abraham’s wife Sarah died at age 127. (Gen. 23:1)
Abraham remarried and had 6 more sons. (Gen. 25:1-2)
Abraham died at age 175. (Gen. 25:7-8)
There’s no reason for Christians to get circumcised though. IIRC, Paul says it isn’t necessary for non-Jews. And the story about the foreskin getting infected all the time just isn’t true, at least today.
Swamper: But, if you want to hide yourself among the Joos when they take over, you might want to look into it. You don’t want to be picked out of THAT lineup!
And who would have ever dared to eat an oyster if God hadn’t explicitly told us not to?
Fyi, the reason I don’t use the preview button is because I never make mistakes.
Do you suppose AllahPundit is praying right now that Hot Air comes back online?
Back up! AP’s prayers were answered!
[Atheist prayers get answered quickest because they barely ever ask for anything. -Ed.]
Ben Franklin said “Beer is proof that there is a God and He wants us to be happy.”
I guess circumcision is proof there is a God and he wants us to be careful with that thing.
Can you imagine the courage of the first guy who said he’d give it a go??
…and what was the contingency plan?
Allah Bobbitt?
There must’ve been an audible groan among the first crowd to ever be told that command. And prolly a lot of giggles from the women.
“…and what was the contingency plan?”
First dibs on the wine?
So you are a grown Jewish man and God hands this one down…as they all sit and cross their legs and nervously glance at each other…
If there God isn’t real, we would have no needfor atheists since we never would have asked the question to begin with!
Sorry for the full retard today! Typing on my iPhone blows!
Stupid Athiests. *kicks dirt*
July 20, 2009 – o has been in power for 6 months.
July 21, 2009 – Fox News reports the world may end tomorrow.
July 22, 2009 – Longest Solar Eclipse of the century.
July 23, 2009 – Thursday. Nothing good every happens on a Thursday.
I’m glad we went to see Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince while there was still time.*
*Spoiler Alert – Dumbledore battles the Balrog.
God (to the Israelite males): “I want all of you to get circumcised!” The Israelite males: “But Lord, what is circumcised?” God: “Just hack a little hide off the end of your pecker and no back talk!” Some people claim God is a female entity, circumcision goes a long way towards making this point.
I’m not a crazy evangelical atheist, so the nation’s motto doesn’t bother me.
I think you could pacify them with just putting sneer quotes around the “offending” word, like:
In “God” We Trust.
Well, we could always go back to the original motto of “E Pluribus Unum” (from many, one.) Or make it “In God Some of Us Trust” so the ‘Us’ or the ‘We’ includes more than just theists.
How about “Jesus is just alright with me.”
Frank, your alter ego is an athiest?! You’d think you’d have led him to Jesus by now. What an easy get!
The whole question about “In God We Trust” on the money won’t matter after Obama’s face appears on all the coins.
Yup, Heinlein got it wrong.
He predicted we would elect our messiah-president in 2012.
Eh, he was only one election off.
I find that most atheists are hippies so I end up punching them.
Well, except that plenty of cultures do it. Plenty of cultures cut off large portions of the female genitalia as well. Some cultures split open the penis (called sub-incision). Some cultures tie up their baby girls feet. Some cultures jam a big hunk of wood through their bottom lip. Some cultures knock a tooth out with a big rock. Some cultures make deep cuts all over a persons body and pour ash into the wounds.
These are things you think prove God’s existence? I think they prove the cruel side that all humans have inside.
If you want to believe in a God that tells you to cut off sensitive, healthy, functional, erogenous genital tissue from infants who cannot say no to the procedure….
..well, I don’t have to say what I think of that, but I bet you can guess.
Many militant atheists are hippies.
Some of us believe in personal responsibility and stuff.
And some of us don’t like McCain’s daughter.
Excess skin that boys couldn’t clean properly, so their doohickees were always getting infected. Don’t get me started about the spiritual side. Abraham believed God and it was accounted to him for righteousness.Because he BELIEVED, he OBEYED. Suit yourself, freewill is a gift of God too. Also gives you the rope to hang yourself, if you so choose.
I get it now, Frank Sinatra told Sammy Davis Jr. to skin the old one eyed trouser trout.
Abraham was 99 years old when he was circumcised. (Gen. 17:1)
Less than a year later his son Isaac was born. (Gen. 21:1-2)
Abraham’s wife Sarah died at age 127. (Gen. 23:1)
Abraham remarried and had 6 more sons. (Gen. 25:1-2)
Abraham died at age 175. (Gen. 25:7-8)
#24 – Live Free or Die,
Amen!
There’s no reason for Christians to get circumcised though. IIRC, Paul says it isn’t necessary for non-Jews. And the story about the foreskin getting infected all the time just isn’t true, at least today.
Swamper: But, if you want to hide yourself among the Joos when they take over, you might want to look into it. You don’t want to be picked out of THAT lineup!
Gasp! You are correct sir! *heads for the hospital*
FEAR THE JOOS