I said it before, and I’ll say it again:
“Any animal that is too slow or too stupid to dodge an oil slick that’s travelling at 0.1 mph deserves to die. Those are the kinds of critters you want out of the gene pool, anyway.”
Do not trifle with the Hand of Darwin.
When I think of oil covered wildlife I think of fried fish, fried chicken, fried pork chops, fried …. well you get the idea.
What about the animals that go towards the oil slick in a vain attempt to pick it up and help the other animals covered in Oil? Is that like a double face slap from Darwin? It should be, since I’m sure Darwin would agree with Frank and say that the Oil Spill should be nuked, thus killing all the animals currently epic failing at survival, just at a faster rate. Then again I guess that would technically be a downside for us since the people going towards it would stop going and stay with us thus polluting the gene pool….
I think Doug may have stumbled on the answer that even Kevin Costner overlooked. Why fight it? Surround the gulf with hot lighted coals and bomb the gulf with cooking oil and barbeque sauce. Hey….USA has a birthday coming up…lets celebrate it in style!!!
I fear flare-ups when I put shrimp on the barby.
Have you noticed that every day they show us footage of oil vomiting out of the pipe on the ocean floor (what does it cost to lower spotlights 5000 ft down so we can all have a clear view? Couldn’t they get the same effect in any competent CGI workshop?), and they show us oil soaked critters near the shore (professionally trained stunt pelicans?), but they never show us what’s going on at the surface above the leak!
Is it lack of curiosity or is there a “No-Fly” zone over BP’s operation?
What kind of 24/7 filler-up-and-go pumping operation has BP set up at the surface?
How many tankers do they have lined up to take on raw, unregulated and untaxed crude oil at any given time?
I don’t think BP’s plan was ever to “Plug the d*mn hole!”
They want to keep the pipe open so they can continue to extract oil from it.
As a plus for them, the moratorium on deep water drilling means their gusher is the only producing well in the Gulf at this time.
It’s all just seems pretty derned suspicious to me!
When does unbelievable incompetence slide into diabolical deviousness?
Ducks taste a lot like chicken. Ducks coated in greasy oil are basically KFC.
I remember reading that before, and I thought it was hilarious then. I still think it’s hilarious now.
@4of7: I recommend producing an expose called, “Loose Brainz.”
Some additional facts:
– Immediately after the “explosion,” Obama refused all aid, support and equipment from 83 foreign nations. Why? Did Obama and BP need to keep them away from the “spill?”
– The beach that Obama visited at the Gulf had only some “tarballs.” Why did this beach look nothing like the footage we see daily on the evening news?
– Shadows of the pelicans do not line up with the sunlight in the videos. Were these “pelicans” filmed in a Hollywood studio?
– Many technologies exist that would plug the leak and capture the “oil.” Why do BP and the administration continue to refuse the use of these proven solutions, such as “nuclear geo-fracture?”
– BP continues to “recover” oil at the site of the “spill.” Why hasn’t BP complied with the moratorium on off-shore drilling? Is BP using the “spill” as the perfect means to “skirt” all laws regarding off-shore drilling?
– BP is not paying taxes on the “recovered” oil, and they don’t need to operate a platform. Is this the new wave of ultra low cost oil production?
– No Jews were killed in the explosion. Were they warned in advance?
Fried shrimp? Yum. Animals are stupid. Flying over the spill they see dark sticky gooey stuff and think “Oh! Look, Chocolate. Here I come!!!”.
i am hearing storys from freinds in the coastal areas that reporters and just citizens in general with cameras are being chased off by BP and Coast Guard security. Just walking along the beach can get you in trouble. Is this even legal? And when did legal ever matter to Obama?
Storm1911 – I think it’s a liability issue. They don’t want some dumbass reporter getting sick after playing with tarballs and licking his fingers.
They do have a legitimate public safety issue here. Imagine if the beach were covered with used syringes. It’s a matter of degree, but the principle of protecting bystanders from a hazard remains.
@Burmashave
What I don’t get is why the Deepwell oil rig sank? I mean, I understand oil burns, but that things was made out of steel. We know steel doesn’t burn, Rosie said so. So the rig should have been fine once the flames were put out. It wasn’t though, and that means someone must have weakened the supports ahead of time and then planted timed explosions. And we know who… Bush Petroleum! That’s who!
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I can’t wait for BP’s new ad campaign: “Try BP gasoline; Now with Organic Sea-Salt, for the Iodine your engine craves!”
(this conspiracy stuff is fun!) 😉
“BP gasoline; Almost totally pelican-free!”