Straight Line of the Day: A New Study Links an Increase in Violence to Climate Change. Also Linked to Climate Change…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

A new study links an increase in violence to climate change. Also linked to climate change…

41 Comments

  1. A new study links an increase in violence to climate change. Also linked to climate change…
    Fire and brimstone coming down from the skies! Rivers and seas boiling! Forty years of darkness! Earthquakes, volcanoes…The dead rising from the grave! Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together… mass hysteria!

  2. A New Study Links an Increase in Violence to Climate Change. Also Linked to Climate Change…

    …the removal of good light bulbs from our choices

    …spring, summer, fall and winter.

    …whatever is is, it’s a bazillion time’s better than Obama’s change.

  3. A new study links an increase in violence to climate change. Also linked to climate change…

    anything that wasn’t the same as yesterday.

    the growing stupidity of most scientists.

    the cookie to bacon ratio in my pantry.

  4. …the number of outraged Muslims. And redundancies.

    …it now takes twice as many mules to pull a load of liberal horse apples.

    …heated up planet gets bigger and greener, has changed name to planet hulk.

    …twice as many flat earthers nowadays fall off the edge.

  5. A New Study Links an Increase in Violence to Climate Change. Also Linked to Climate Change…

    … the expansion of Michelle Obama’s buttocks.

    … the insatiable urge of the Obamalemmings to migrate to Martha’s Vineyard.

    … the daily weather.

  6. A new study links an increase in violence to climate change. Also linked to climate change…
    Piranhacondas! — It’s like a unholy union between a piranha and an anaconda. You mean a piranhaconda? I can’t believe you just said that.

  7. A new study links an increase in violence to climate change. Also linked to climate change…
    Anything I can think of to keep that sweet grant money flowing. Ah, sweet, sweet grant money — take that Farnsworth!

  8. … a ‘decrease’ in violence to climate change.

    In the 70s it was Global Cooling. Wrong.
    In the 90s and until just a year or so ago, it was Global Warming. Wrong again.
    Today it is Climate Change, because the climate is always changing, so surely they’ll get it right.
    But I still wouldn’t trust them… because whatever they say… it is always proven wrong.

  9. …the sweat on Chris Matthews upper lip has increased from a stream to a creek.

    …Fight Club changed the first rule to: When it’s this hot it’s OK to pee into the wind.

    …hyperventilation by scientists worried about violence from overly warm people, plain old ventilating violent people by an armed society.

    …serial killer Buffalo Bill has been concentrating strictly on Democrats due to their thin skin.

    …wilting, melting and fear of sparking a forest fire are perfectly believable excuses for ED, making for a 100% stress free American male population.

  10. A new study links an increase in violence to climate change. Also linked to climate change…

    … the number of horrible SyFy movies like ‘Sharknado’.
    … the personal credibility of serious scientists turned into Chicken-Little alarmists.
    … rumors that Punxsutawney Phil accepts payoff from Big Oil to predict colder winters.
    … graphs resembling hockey sticks showing the money earned by climate hucksters like Al Gore.
    … sedation levels required by eco-weenies on MSNBC screaming ‘Deniers!’
    … any damn thing they can think of to divert attention from Obama’s constant failures.

  11. A New Study Links an Increase in Violence to Climate Change. Also Linked to Climate Change…

    … a rapid widening of the FLOTUS’ gluteus maximus.

    … a decrease in ammunition availability.

  12. Pingback: IMAO » Blog Archive » You’ve Been Judged!

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