Straight Line of the Day: It’s Come Out That the NSA Spied on Mexico’s President. They Learned…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

It’s come out that the NSA spied on Mexico’s President. They learned…

72 Comments

  1. It’s come out that the NSA spied on Mexico’s President. They learned…

    Way down here you need a reason to move
    Feel a fool running your stateside games
    Lose your load, leave your mind behind, Baby James

  2. It’s come out that the NSA spied on Mexico’s President. They learned…

    Davey Crockett went out to Texas
    To fight at the Alamo
    Old Will Travis never told him
    Texas is in Mexico
    It’s a bloody mess
    You know the rest

  3. …that he is not only white; He’s in charge of the drug cartels. Therefore making him the de facto white villain in the next Hollywood Mexploitation flick: “El Frijole Blanco!” – once you smell him coming…it’s too late.

  4. It’s come out that the NSA spied on Mexico’s President. They learned…
    Deedn’t your mother tell you to look both ways before crosseeng the railroad tracks? You could get hurt!

  5. It’s come out that the NSA spied on Mexico’s President. They learned…Badges? We ain’t got no badges. We don’t need no badges! I don’t have to show you any stinkin’ badges!

  6. It’s come out that the NSA spied on Mexico’s President. They learned…

    All the burning bridges that have fallen after me
    All the lonely feelings and the burning memories
    Everyone I left behind each time I closed the door
    Burning bridges lost forevermore

  7. ….. that all that earned money the illegals make here is really not sent to their families in Mexico.
    The President gets his cut, and they have the Gov’t Workers engage in Death Matches to distribute the rest of the dough……..

  8. It’s come out that the NSA spied on Mexico’s President. They learned…

    He lives on a cul de sac with his family, parents, brother and his wife and family as well as his wife’s sister husband and their kids…..and there is only one car in the driveway!

  9. …that the presidents limo has a ladder and two leaf blowers on top to blend in with the local traffic.

    …Mexicans must show a drivers license from their US state of residence to vote in Mexican elections.

    …every other person in Mexico is there illegally, but are just passing through.

    …nothing.

    …Def Leppard will give their final performance somewhere, anywhere in Mexico.

  10. It’s come out that the NSA spied on Mexico’s President. They learned…

    …his name is Enrique Peña Nieto.

    …that he’s been sexting with Dilma Rousseff.

    …that he has no plans to sneak across the border.

    …that he might own a couple of Fast & Furious guns.

    …that he has no drug cartel.

    …that they speak Spanish in Mexico.

  11. It’s come out that the NSA spied on Mexico’s President. They learned…

    …he is devoutly Catholic; tired of hearing about the Battle of the Alamo; eats tacos, nachos, and beans and rice; drinks tequila and beer; enjoys a daily siesta in his hammock; wears a sombrero, serape and sandals around the house; owns a chihuahua, has an affinity for Cinco de Mayo, mariachi, bullfights, hat dances, and soccer.

    …that in a secret meeting, he told Eric Holder and Janet Napolitano: “Badges? We don’t need no stinkin’ badges!” (or more accurately, “Badges, to god-damned hell with badges! We have no badges. In fact, we don’t need badges. I don’t have to show you any stinking badges, you god-damned cabrón and chinga tu madre!”)

    …he loves to tell American law enforcement officials e.g. DEA, ICE, and Homeland Security: “Badges? We don’t need no stinkin’ badges!” (or more accurately, “Badges, to god-damned hell with badges! We have no badges. In fact, we don’t need badges. I don’t have to show you any stinking badges, you god-damned cabrón and chinga tu madre!”)

    …he enjoys asking American dignitaries: “Hey meester, would you like to meet my seester?”

    …he does not sport a mustache and he does not drink Dos Equis; therefore he is not the “most interesting man in the world.”

    …he once considered dropping out of law school to become a landscaper or pool boy in Hollywood — where the pay was better.

    …he is a member of the Institutional Revolutionary Party — whatever the hell that is.

  12. Pingback: IMAO » Blog Archive » You’ve Been Judged!

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