Straight Line of the Day: Nancy Pelosi Said People Should Vote Democrat Next Week Because…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

Nancy Pelosi said people should vote Democrat next week because…

67 Comments

  1. …it may be the last time you get to vote.

    …her face has fallen and can’t get up to the polling place.

    …it’s a good way to self late term abort since Obamacare is taking too long.

    …because how else can you get right wing extremists to stop being first.

    …nothing says liberal like destroying world around your enemies.

  2. …”After this, the Deluge!”

    …”nice little country you got here – it would be too bad if something were to happen…”

    …at this point, what difference does it make?

    …we’re keeping a list…

    …IRS agents are standing by…

  3. … you can do it so often!

    … that’s how your vote is going to be registered anyway.

    … if you’re going to become one of the unemployed, you might as well vote like them too.

    … if you’re not part of dissolution (or disillusion), you’re part of the problem.

  4. . . . otherwise the oceans will rise, the planet will stop healing, the Rethuglicans will confiscate your condoms and force wymyn into pregnancy at gunpoint, mass shootings with assault weapons will occur daily in elementary schools (outside of Chicago, even!), African Americans will be called Negroes again (oh, the indignity!), men will openly leer at attractive wymyn, wymyn will be called women again (oh, the indignity!), people will openly drink 32-oz. Big Gulps and refused to be shamed into good health, people will have to pay for their own gender reassignment surgeries, college tuition debts will be collected, gay marriage will be openly questioned, people will be free to express religious opinions that are not favored by the intelligentsia, the borders will be closed, Europeans will laugh at us, NASA will stop reaching out to Muslims, the Armed Forces will stop trying to combat climate change, the CDC won’t care if lesbians get fat, school lunches will be edible again (oh, the childhood obesity!), and our terrorist chickens will all come home to roost.

  5. . . . it’s less effort than making an informed choice.

    . . . they know where you live and where your children attend school.

    . . . it’s the part of Teddy Kennedy, Jimmy Carter, Christopher Dodd, Al Gore, and John Kerry.

  6. Nancy Pelosi said people should vote Democrat next week because…

    that’s how we are going to be counting them anyway.

    most of their usual illegal voters will be back in Mexico visiting relatives.

    SQUIRRELS!!!!!!!!

    the world is round it turns me on…..

    otherwise she’s doing that “spread” in next month’s Playboy.

    otherwise she will have Anonymiss audited and there will be no more cookies!

    I’m be coming for you, and you’re little dog too!

  7. @37 Bob B: That’s what happens when you incompletely replace “have gotten” with “are”.

    Plus, “hare” sounds more like a pirate than “are”!

    And, as for bunny abuse, they wouldn’t just be losing their jobs, but also their bunny-fits.

  8. HokieGomer #34 says: …because if you don’t, Hillary is going to come by and take your won’t be able to take other people’s cookies and redistribute them more fairly to you!

    Fixed it.

  9. Nancy Pelosi said people should vote Democrat next week because…

    If America is going to continue its path to Hell as envisioned by the current White House idiocracy, people should elect history’s most proficient shuttle handbasket service as a support group.

  10. …face it, you’re too darn lazy to add moaning and groaning to your begging and pleading.

    …if the Rethuglicans win who they gonna call? GHOSTBUSTERS!!! Then we will never win another election.

  11. …she’ll get you and your little dog Toto too!

    …democrat voters are so lazy they’ll put off voting till the following week.

    …democrat voters are so stupid they’ll forget which party to vote for and the next thing you know, Pat Buchanan wins in a landslide.

  12. Nancy Pelosi said people should vote Democrat next week because…
    … otherwise she will eat your children!
    … useless nitwits like to feel needed.
    … dial 2 for potato (seems as good as any other reason, sorry).

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