Straight Line of the Day: The Most Popular Halloween Costume in DC This Year…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

The most popular Halloween costume in DC this year…

43 Comments

  1. … is the Type 2 Diabetic (DC residents give them the most candy).

    … is made up of a large circular front piece, typically light brown with colorful spots, with a matching back piece. The wearer goes door to door reading the original Contract For America, or the Constitution, or a script from the Rush Limbaugh show. I call it The Anonymiss Cookie. (Wearers should be careful as they may be exceptionally popular, especially among those with low blood sugar.)

  2. …is an Undertaker. There going to be a lot of “dead”* politicians in DC in a little over a week.

    * DISCLAIMER – This is not to be construed as a direct or indirect threat against anyone real or imagined. It is a literary reference used to indicate that many political careers will be ending on Tuesday, November 4, 2014 due to the exercise of constitutional rights through the power of the citizen to vote. No claims are made against individuals found in the local DC parks.

  3. It’s not the costumes, per se, but what the kids are saying this year. It’s not “Trick or Treat!” as usual. For some reason this year, it’s “Obama sucks. Now give me all yo mofo candy!”

  4. … is a “law” suit. (Hint: it’s more full of holes than Charlie Brown’s.)

    … is Ebola Lugosi.

    … is someone who doesn’t show up at all: Malaysia Airlines flight 370.

    … is a Halloween czar, a trick-or-treating czar, a candy czar, a doorbell-ringing czar, and a prank czar. (All with government paychecks and retirement plans.)

  5. …normally, if somewhat casually dressed people saying trick-or-vote as they stroll across the “border”.

    …will once again be anything but a dog.

    …cats. Or, in Washington speech, obese DC felines..

    …Bill Clinton mask wearing white guys saying get it, I’m the Washington Monument. Usually right before they get kicked in the junk.

  6. … is Sgt. Bergdahl, a.k.a. Occupy AWOL Street.

    … is Obama as Mr. Isis Miser.

    … is Zombie Obama as a Corpse-Man.
    … is Zombie Hillary as someone Dead Broke.

    … is an Obamacare bus full of 26-year-olds sporting a sign that says “Baby On Board.”
    … is a Hillary bus with the wheels off, because it’s no ways tired. (h/t Jimmy, because I can’t hear that phrase without thinking of him!)

  7. …an empty chair, a pen and a phone. You’re dressed as pure evil.

    …Reggie Love’s old clothes, but you’re Ebola, Obama’s NEW best friend.

    …an axe wielding walnut, out to kill some yummy cookie taste.

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