Besides “Would you prefer to stand?”
Early-Breaking News
Bond Girlathon Friday : Results from 6/5/2026 : New Matches for 6/12/2026

Hello, we still going with this? I hope so.
Results from 6/5/2026
| Denise Perrier | No Preference | Mie Hama |
| 94 | 3 | 34 |
| (16) Izabella Scorupco | No Preference | Akiko Wakabayashi |
| 128 | 1 | 44 |
New Matches for 6/12/2026
Match 1
Tsai Chin (Ling) vs (4) Famke Janssen (Xenia Onatopp)
| Contestant | Record | Total Scores |
| Tsai Chin | 0 – 6 – 0 | 252 – 9 – 844 |

Actress: Tsai Chin Nationality: Chinese Bond Movie: You Only Live Twice (1967) Synopsis:
In the opening scenes of the film, Bond is shown in bed with Ling, as the two discuss why Chinese girls taste different from all other girls. Ling gets up and presses a button that rockets the bed upwards into the wall, and two gunmen enter the room to kill Bond. It is later revealed to the audience that Ling was helping to stage Bond’s death in order to keep his enemies off his back.

VS
| Contestant | Record | Total Scores |
|---|---|---|
| (4) Famke Janssen | 6 – 0 – 0 | 864 – 8 – 284 |

Actress: Famke Janssen Nationality: Dutch Bond Movie: Goldeneye (1995) Synopsis:
Xenia Onatopp was a henchwoman working alongside the traitor General Ourumov. She stole a Tiger Helicopter, a new prototype that was resistant to electromagnetic pulses. She then helped Ourumov steal the codes and launch key for the Goldeneye satellite weapon from the Severnaya Space Control Centre. She killed the staff and programmed Goldeneye to destroy the facility with electromagnetic pulses that wouldn’t effect the Tiger. She flirted with Bond and tried to kill him on multiple occasions, but Bond ended up onatopp.

Match 2
Karin Dor (Helga Brandt) vs Serena Gordon (Caroline)
| Contestant | Record | Total Scores |
|---|---|---|
| Karin Dor | 1 – 5 – 0 | 365 – 10 – 790 |

Actress: Karin Dor Nationality: German Bond Movie: You Only Live Twice (1967) Synopsis:
Helga Brandt was a SPECTRE henchwoman who pretended to fall in love with Bond and switch to his side, only to try and kill him the next morning. For failing to kill Bond, Brandt is killed by head of SPECTRE Blofeld, who drops her into a pool of piranha fish. Helga Brandt was very similar to prior Bond girl Fiona Volpe, as the producers tried to replicate their prior success.

VS
| Contestant | Record | Total Scores |
|---|---|---|
| Serena Gordon | 1 – 5 – 0 | 405 – 15 – 674 |

Actress: Serena Gordon Nationality: English Bond Movie: Goldeneye (1995) Synopsis:
Caroline was a psychological evaluator working for MI6. She was sent by M to evaluate Bond, who took her for a drive in his Aston Martin DB5. Bond drove very fast and engaged in a race with Xenia Onatopp, making Caroline very uncomfortable. After screaming at Bond to slow down, Bond came to an abrupt stop, and seduced Caroline with a bottle of Bollinger champagne hidden in an armrest. The two proceed with a “very thorough evaluation.”

Straight Line of the Day: I Can’t Prove It, But I Suspect…
- … that when street-corner protesters hold up their signs from exactly 11:00 to exactly 1:00 and then go home, it is no mere coincidence. They are being paid.
- … some liberal group, somewhere, gets residuals every time the “B” in “Black” is upper-case. Capitalization is key in a market economy!
- … women secretly lust after me.
Welcome to IMAO! We’re Tinkering With Some New Technology…
Cartoons and Memes
Straight Line of the Day: Per Bob B, “Don’t Listen To This Guy, He’s Nuts!” For Instance, He Claims …
Here’s the Key: After the Straight Line, Take the Rest of the Day Off
Bond Girlathon Wednesday : Results from 6/3/2026 : New Matches for 6/10/2026

Does not look like I can do a table format for information. THings might look a bit weird.
Results for 6/3/2026
(2) Diana Rigg 167 Defeats Carmen du Sautoy 8 No Preference 2
(15) Maud Adams 157 Defeats Francoise Therry 22 No Preference 1
Matches for 6/10/2026
Match 1
(1) Barbara Bach (Anya Amasova) vs (7) Britt Ekland (Mary Goodnight)
(1) Barbara Bach (Record) 8 – 0 – 0 (Total Scores) 1765 – 8 – 217

Anya Amasova
Actress: Barbara Bach Nationality: American Bond Movie: The Spy Who Loved Me (1977) Synopsis:
Anya Amasova, code name ‘Triple X’, was a KGB agent working under General Gogol. She had the same mission as Bond, to retrieve stolen microfilms for a submarine tracking system. After half co-operating and half getting in the way of each other, Bond and Amasova meet their bosses at the Egyptian HQ, who tell them that MI6 and the KGB are now co-operating, and the two should work together.

Barbara Bach
VS
(7) Britt Ekland (Record) 6 – 2 – 0 (Total Scores) 1270 – 15 – 496

Mary Goodnight
Actress: Britt Ekland Nationality: Swedish Bond Movie: The Man with the Golden Gun (1974) Synopsis:
Mary Goodnight was Bond’s assistant in Hong Kong, and previously his secretary in London. She helps Bond to locate Miss Anders, the girlfriend of hitman Scaramanga. The two almost spend the night together on multiple occasions, and at one point Goodnight is embarrassingly shoved into a cupboard when Miss Anders pays Bond a surprise visit. Goodnight is eventually kidnapped by Scaramanga, but after Bond kills him, Goodnight helps Bond escape his Island.

Britt Ekland
Match 2
(16) Sue Vanner (Log Cabin Girl) vs (11) Madelaine Smith (Miss Caruso)
(16) Sue Vanner (Record) 5 – 3 – 0 (Total Scores) 931 – 12 – 757

Log Cabin Girl
Actress: Sue Vanner Nationality: English Bond Movie: The Spy Who Loved Me (1977) Synopsis:
The log cabin girl, played by Sue Vanner, was a KGB agent, and a lover of James Bond. While Bond and the girl were curled up under some furs on the floor of an isolated log cabin, M sent a message to Bond’s wrist watch that he was needed at once at HQ. As Bond got up to leave, the girl said “But James, I need you.”, to which Bond replied “So does England.” After he left, the girl radioed to KGB henchmen that Bond had let.

Sue Vanner
VS
(11) Madelaine Smith (Record) 5 – 3 – 0 (Total Scores) 1049 – 5 – 723

Miss Caruso
Actress: Madeline Smith Nationality: English Bond Movie: Live and Let Die (1973) Synopsis:
Miss Caruso was an agent of the Italian Secret Service. She was asleep with Bond at his home when, just before 6am, the doorbell rang. Bond answered the door to find M, who announced an urgent mission. He also casually mentioned that the Italian’s were complaining about their missing agent, Miss Caruso. In a scene lit with humour, Bond continually distracts M to avoid him finding Caruso, with a little help from Miss Moneypenny, who had accompanied M.

Madeline Smith
Hate Crime? Man Arrested for Australopithecussing
Straight Line of the Day: How Not To Appear Insane: …
Caption This!
Babesleaga Group AM : Week 6 : Tuesday Weld vs Eva Renzi
Good night.
Tuesday Weld vs Eva Renzi
Tuesday Weld (4-1-0 Pts. 235 Avg. 47.00)
- Week 1 Lost to Elke Sommer 44-47
- Week 2 Defeated Dyan Cannon 51-29
- Week 3 Defeated Jean Seberg 58-12
- Week 4 Defeated Sharon Tate 36-27
- Week 5 Defeated Ursula Andress 46-26

VS
Eva Renzi (2-3-0 Pts. 193 Avg. 38.60)
- Week 1 Defeated Jean Seberg 54-25
- Week 2 Lost to Elke Sommer 26-56
- Week 3 Lost to Sharon Tate 27-42
- Week 4 Lost to Ursula Andress 37-41
- Week 5 Defeated Mary Ure 49-19

Babesleaga Group AM : Week 6 : Sharon Tate vs Mary Ure
Good evening.
Sharon Tate vs Mary Ure
Sharon Tate (3-2-0 Pts. 227 Avg. 45.40)
- Week 1 Lost to Ursula Andress 44-48
- Week 2 Defeated Jean Seberg 64-23
- Week 3 Defeated Eva Renzi 42-27
- Week 4 Lost to Tuesday Weld 27-36
- Week 5 Defeated Dyan Cannon 50-29

VS
Mary Ure (0-5-0 Pts. 105 Avg. 21.00)
- Week 1 Lost to Dyan Cannon 26-57
- Week 2 Lost to Ursula Andress 24-58
- Week 3 Lost to Elke Sommer 12-58
- Week 4 Lost to Jean Seberg 24-27
- Week 5 Lost to Eva Renzi 19-49

Breaking News! Trump Must Stand Down as President — Final Count From California Shows Nithya Raman Actually Won 2024 Election















