Kim du Toit points out some big anti-gun hypocrisy (then again, you can’t swing a dead cat these days without hitting anti-gun hypocrisy).
Andrea Harris makes me realize I’ve been spelling “wacko” wrong all this time. I’m sorry.
Finally, I somehow missed this on The Spoons Experience from a number of days ago. It’s the most powerful optical illusion I think I’ve ever seen. I will never trust my eyes ever again.
Archive of entries posted on 8th October 2002
I Am the Greatest Blogger Ever!
John Hawkins made a list of best blogs based on the votes of 22 different bloggers, and I made honorable mention! Considering who is on the top fifteen, that’s pretty cool. Yeah, it’s probably some freak occurence and wouldn’t have happened with a larger sample, but I’ll take it.
Just in Case You Forgot: Other Countries Are Stupid
I tried hating the Germans for a change, but it just didn’t work out. I’m going back to hating the goddamn frogs. This poll in France had Israel ranked as the second biggest threat to world peace. Surprisingly, it was Iraq ranked number one and not America (perhaps they were too scared to list us). Rounding out the top five were Syria, Iran, and bathing daily. The French have some of the most screwed up values; I’d let a shoplifting eight year old sermonize me before a Frenchman (is that an oxymoron?). I hear the poll results had a significant margin of error, though, as many of the French, upon hearing the names of all the scary countries to choose from, ended up surrendering to the pollster instead of answering the question.
Also, though Tony Blair has been cool lately, I must point out that a lot of Brits are still idiots. Apparently this conversation happened in London at some point:
“We’ve banned handguns and now crime has gone up. I wonder why that happened?”
“I know! We forgot to ban replica guns!”
“Cheerio! Let’s ban replica guns and then have tea and crumpets!”
Yeah, they tried banning fake guns. They’re getting killed with real ones, and they’re worried about replica firearms! The Home Office decided that the legislation was too complicated so it got shelved, but what about the legislation being one of the most retarded ideas man has ever conceived? God, that is pathetic. I remember a debate in Britain over whether the police should be able to carry tasers. It’s like they all want to be killed by criminals. Luckily we have some sense here in America; if someone tried to take my replica gun or taser, I’d shoot them – and I don’t even have a replica gun or a taser. That’s just how much more freedom we have here in America.
October Surprise
I watched Bush’s speech last night, and, though it was good and straight to the point, it was all stuff we already knew. I thought it would have been awesome if he ended with some huge surprise.
“So, with everything I have outlined, it seems that Iraq is our biggest threat… but then I looked further into the issue. Where was Iraq getting all its funding? Where were they getting their intelligence data? Who was behind Saddam and his push for evil?” Bush then pointed to Gerhard Schroeder who sat among them in the audience. “It was Germany behind this all along! That’s why I use this opportunity not to declare war on Iraq, but on Germany!”
“This is absurd!” Schroeder exclaimed, trying to look shocked, “You unilateralist Americans have finally gone insane.”
“Germany never gave up their evil Nazi ways,” Bush continued, staring at the evil Schroeder, “They just hid them, using Iraq as their patsy as they pretended all they were interested in were making quality automobiles. But, the truth is, Schroeder is the son of Hitler and Saddam is his illegitimate half brother!”
“Lies! Lies!” Schroeder yelled, rising to his feet. He could then see that no one else believed him, his Hitler evil too obvious. He then began to laugh, a laugh of pure evil that curdled one’s blood. “We’ll bury you America! We’ll bury you all!” He then was propelled skyward by a jetpack hidden under his coat, crashing through the skylight for his escape.
I’m not saying the speech was bad; I’m just saying it should have had a bit more theatrics if it’s going to play in a prime time slot.