The Cato Institute is taking Washington D.C.’s handgun ban to court. There are people who actually argue that allowing law abiding citizens to have handguns in D.C. would cause more deaths, but I don’t believe that is actually possible since, if the murder rate were any higher, then the murderers would be killing each other causing violent crime to level off. While I think challenging the law in court is a good idea, I propose an even more dynamic idea to fight for gun rights. What the NRA should adopt is a policy of shooting people who disagree with them. It’s a much simpler solution than trying to force logic on to people who are apparently morally opposed to it.
“If we limit gun purchases to one a month, that will stop murders.”
BANG!
“Convoluted statistics show you’re more likely to shoot yourself than blah blah blah.”
BANG! BANG! BANG!
“If we make a gun free school zone, that will stop people from shooting children.”
STAB! BANG! (that gun had a bayonet)
I don’t care how idiotic an argument or how much statistics someone can produce, it won’t stop a bullet. The only rebuttal to a gun is another gun, but if gun control nuts starting using guns, they lose their argument. So, shooting people who are for gun control both defeats them physically and philosophically. See, isn’t this a brilliant, win-win idea? I don’t know why someone hasn’t used it yet. Well, I guess some people would say it’s not right to shoot people, but they wouldn’t say that if I had a gun pointed at them. Makes you think, doesn’t it?
Actually, I have thought about your ‘win-win’ idea, but then I get to the part where the criminal enablers start bitching and moaning about how firearms are being used to kill people.
So I remember that they like to equate the licensing of gun owners to the licensing of automobile drivers, so I figure I can run them over with my 8mpg truck. But then I think of how I might get blood and hair on my POW-MIA front license plate.
I then go through all the other ways unarmed people have been murdered in the past. All the way from knives to baseball bats. And then I remember that my father taught me to only kill in self-defense and that sometimes its entertaining to just sit back and laugh my ass off at the asinine bile that these people spew on a daily basis. Even though its all lies and half-truths.
But then I remember that they have almost unlimited control of broadcast media and the ‘if you tell a lie often enough it becomes the truth’ theory and it starts all over again.
This vicious circle allways ends up with me at the local pistol range, which is not a bad thing. I’m happy, the guy who runs the range is happy, I’m becoming a better shot and the economy is being stimulated by my ammo purchaces.
That sounds about right.
Nope. Mistaken logic. If we shot All the people who wanted to take away our guns, then all the whining would stop. Gun owners never complain about gun ownership, just like SUV drivers never moan about gas-guzzling SUVs either.
I have first dibs on Mayor Daley when this policy becomes law.
Unless the gun control folks were handed light-sabers. Unlikely, maybe, but who knows… Then you just know who’d win the inevitable battle.
The gun-control people better not be Jedi. I don’t think Jedi are that whiny, though.
If they are, to hell with guns. I want to battle evil at the furthurest corners of the universe. Or battle anything, really. As long as I get a light-saber.
Don’t ever say to hell with guns. Though a lightsaber may seem cooler, it’s just not practical without force powers.
I wouldn’t worry about lightsaber-wielding Jedi. They only want to protect the politician. Kinda like the Swiss Guard in the Vatican: colorful, but largely irrelevant.
The anti-gun crowd would never do something so honorable as join the Jedi Knights.
“I don’t think Jedi are that whiny, though”
Yeah, because, you know, everyone knows that a whiny little brat of a farm kid could never become a jedi, right?
Oh, yeah, the original article. Good idea! Passing out lightsabers to gun control folks: Also a good idea! I like to see self-decapitations, they’re entertaining.
Gun control is a wonderful thing. Gun control is an idea whose time has come. Real, meaningful gun control will save countless lives.
BTW, gun control is keeping control over your gun at all times. It’s keeping it safe from theft and it’s using it to hit what you’re aiming at.
Ancient weapons and hoaky religion are no match for a good blaster in your hand.
NUKE THE MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONN