Blimey Times Three!

Maybe I should start having a pool about how many e-mails (here is one and two for those joining us late) it takes until Tony Pentin gets a clue. I’m hoping a lot, because this stuff writes itself.
Anyhoo, once again vulgar nouns are replaced with “ronin”, f’ing with “hippy-dippy”, the s-word with “linguini”, piss-off with “have a nice day”, and the f-word with “I challenge”. All for The Children™. Enjoy:

I’d already sent this email when I thought I’d better send it again with the red background to symbolise socialism. I bet you hate this! [Ed. Note: Sorry I couldn’t do the red background of his e-mail for you. Just use your imagination.]
Well, I see you haven’t changed in the last three days since you wrote your latest drivel! And neither has your countries stupid interventionalist foreign policy as you storm into Haiti like a bunch of macho bastards. What most surprises me is that Bush hasn’t supported that fascist Aristide! And you self-gratifying bastards are only going there to protect your precious embassy!
You’re a sick ronin! I was hoping the poor would invade Hollywood at the awards last night and make a speech!
Everything’s bombing with you! If you’re not on about bombing then you’re on about bombing! Change the hippy-dippy tune! You sound like the backwoodsman rural hick that you are!
So it took you two emails to work out who Rage Against the Machine were? They were only one of the biggest bands in the world in the 90’s you dumb ronin!
And what’s this drivel about France should not be allowed their own foreign policy no matter what China says? I’m not from China so you’ve just lost your own argument you silly little boy! I’m not a communist – who was that who condemned North Korea in the last email? That was me! And your attitude is the reason why everybody hates your country – you’re a bunch of self-important lying ronins that contradict yourselves!
Have a nice day redneck!
Remember what I was saying about American greed? Have a look at the lyrics to the brilliant parody by Rage Against the Machine for “Sleep Now in the Fire” which was done in 1999 as a warning that the linguini was gonna hit the fan if that ronin Bush was elected. It’s a parody of that redneck murdering ronin known as Bush. Do you know what a parody is? It’s when somebody imitates somebody else. Just thought I’d point that out.
Look at when Rage condemn the lack of democracy in your country with the brilliant lines “there is no other pill to take, so swallow the one that makes you ill”. Very true. I mean there’s many parties in America – the socialist parties and the environmental parties with people running for president but it’s either the democrats or the republicans for everybody – as if nobody else exists.
Outstanding lines from THE LEFT.
www.musicfanclubs.org/rage/lyrics/sleep.htm
I CHALLENGE YOU YOU RONIN!

What can I possibly say to that…

Hey! It’s Limey! Nice to hear from you. How are the folks? How is London? I thought I heard that it’s being bombed by Germany again, but I might have just accidentally turned on the History Channel instead of Fox News.
The red background is pretty neat, but you need to use a lighter text color against it for better readability. Some reason I’m thinking yellow; I don’t know why.
No, I haven’t changed in past three days. The doctor said the meds will take at least two weeks before my body gets used to them, and then the voices should be more quiet. Thanks for caring, though, limey.
You’re right about us liking to protect our embassies, limey. That’s where we keep our gold and diamonds we still from the indigenous people. As soon as that is secured, we’ll get out of there and leave the people to fester in their misery just as you want, so don’t worry, limey. No more being all macho for us.
No, the poor didn’t invade Hollywood; we keep them too starving to have energy for riots. That’s called strategery. Lord of the Rings won best picture though, and it was a great film about killing evil people… just like America does! And it was filmed in New Zealand (what happened to the old Zealand?) which I think is near where you live, limey. I don’t look at maps much, though, because they’re just full of other countries which don’t serve much purpose to us.
I didn’t mean to imply that an upstanding, red socialist like you might have anything to do with Communsim, limey. I was just saying I don’t care about China’s opinion the same as I don’t care about the evil, genocidal French. I think we’ll have war with them next; won’t that be fun! I wonder if we can make the Eiffel Tower fall on something. They just better film it, or the war will be for nothing. Does France have much oil, BTW?
And you don’t like rednecks? I thought you liked red, limey?
Thanks for telling what a parody is, limey my friend. I’ve heard all about those and they sound fun. Maybe I’ll try one of these days. Will you tell what you think about it? I always wanted the opinion of a limey.
Wow! Those lyrics are cool and symbolic. They’re almost as good as the lyrics from Toby Keith’s (was he in Angry at the Machine before they broke up?) “Courtesy of the Red White and Blue”. Look at this line:
“And you’ll be sorry that you messed with
The U.S. of A.
‘Cause we’ll put a boot in your ass
It’s the American way”
It’s symbolic, because we’re not actually putting any boots up any one’s ass, but instead are going to bomb the crap out of them and shoot them with bullets (though some of our enemies may get pegged with tracer rounds; won’t that be funny). Here’s the rest of it with more symbolism just like the Machine Ragers.
http://www.werismyki.com/writings/angry_american.html
I hope you enjoy.
Cordially,
Stupiud Bastrad
http://imao.us
P.S. Another thing with great symbolism is the poem the Jabberwocky.
http://www.jabberwocky.com/carroll/jabber/jabberwocky.html
“Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.”
I think if you look at it carefully, it’s a commentary about how unfair our social class system is and that the oppression of the poor can’t go on forever. Or, maybe I’m just reading it all wrong and it’s actually about how small your penis is.
Wanker.

I bet every blogger wants their own pet limey now.

No Comments

  1. “…How is London? I thought I heard that it’s being bombed by Germany again, but I might have just accidentally turned on the History Channel instead of Fox News…..”
    LOL damn I spilt my drink laughing at that one! Oh well I gotta head for the air-raid shelter now…they always start a raid just when I’m about to print off my coursework dammit!

  2. To the esteemed Mr. Pentin:
    1) Typically, one’s politics come from observation of the world & human history, followed by reflection upon the human condition infused with moral values; not by listening to second rate rock bands after the 30th bong hit….or was it 50th? oh wait I can’t remember [giggles and bubbling sound heard].
    2) The definition of parody includes the element of humor, which is only unintentionally present in your work (a self-parody) and totally lacking in Whine Against the Machine lyrics.
    3) Everybody else check out the lyrics. You can see Howard Dean’s scream at the end!

  3. 1) I wouldn’t necessarily call Rage Against The Machine one of the “biggest bands of the 90’s”.
    2) Rage Against The Machine achieved popularity in the 90’s, so I would assume the machine they were raging against was the Clinton/Gore Tax-Muncher Machine
    3) So we suck because we’re going to Haiti like “Macho Rednecks”, then we suck because we aren’t going to war with North Korea like Macho Rednecks….did I miss something?
    4) Who cares if the poor invade Hollywood….is he too stupid to realize that real Americans only like Hollywood when they make a good movie like 2 Fast 2 Furious (where was IT’S Oscar on Sunday night….ronins)
    5) So he’s a socialist but not a commie? I thought a Socialist was just a commie who was too lazy to fill out his “So-You-Wanna-Be-A-Commie Application”
    6) He’s awfully angry for someone who hates violence.
    7) Does he often form his Welteschung from bad, image driven, mid-90’s Corporate Rock Bands (yea, I’m talkin’ about Rage Against The Machine limey)? Funny, I’m enough of a person to form my OWN opinions, not get it from CD Liner Notes.
    8) No wonder we whupped their butts in the American Revolution.
    9) I wonder who would win in a wrestling match between Limeyman and Aquaman.
    10) Every list needs a number 10, so here it is.

  4. I’ve got my own limey…she’s called The Wife. She’s great around the house and with pets. Not so good with children (you know, that whole dental issue). But, once past that, there’s no problems. Only that she needs to suck up my bandwidth by endlessly downloading episodes of the Brit soap “East Enders” (which, by the way, is “linguini”).

  5. Frank:
    Please interview Limey for your blog – that would be the funniest.
    Actually I am glad I don’t have my own limey writing me because I wouldn’t be as funny as you. Just angry.
    But then again all us Canadians are angry, macho, bomb crazy rednecks.,
    We just don’t have any bombs.
    Or “stategery”.

  6. Frank,
    How about this Willie/Toby reference:
    Justice is the one thing you should always find
    You got to saddle up your boys
    You got to draw a hard line
    When the gun smoke settles we’ll sing a victory tune
    We’ll all meet back at the local saloon
    We’ll raise up our glasses against evil forces
    Singing whiskey for my men, beer for my horses

  7. Hmm, something is wrong here. Pentin is a french name, translated it means miniscule penis. So the truth is out, this a french Limey, or half a limey at best. Wonder if that would be a lemon-limey? Will have to watch this closely, I am thinking he will surrender much to quickly.

  8. I wish he’d quit going on and on about the poor–every culture or society has a bottom layer, and ours is no different. Well, actually, it is different, because instead of that bottom layer being the biggest layer like in a pyramid (which is what most of the world looks like) our bottom layer (the truly poor, not who the IRS says is poor) is very, very small compared to the rest of our layers, except for the layer of the filthy, obscenely rich, which makes our societal shape a diamond. And I mean, let’s face it, 35 million out of 270 million isn’t all that bad. I just wish people would quit demanding perfection from us; it’s the whole “pointing out the speck in your brother’s eye when there is a plank in your own” thing. I don’t think Jesus would approve.

  9. “…how small your penis is.”
    *** snort! cough! hack! chortle! snort! ***
    D@amn it! Do you have ANY idea how much it hurts to have hot coffee shoot out your nose?!?!?
    More word substitution suggestions:
    – “bangers and mash” for fecal matter.
    – “polo-playing” for fing when used as an adjective
    – “correcting the grammer of” for f
    ing when used as a verb
    – “Tower of London” for @ss or the opening there of.
    – “Abba” or “The Bee Gees” for “Rage Against the Machine”

  10. Rent-A-Limey Service!
    For those who would like their own limey but can’t afford a real one, I offer a service where I can send you e-mail which “appears” to be from a limey complete with nasty Limey Talk® brand slang. Get one message for $5 USD or get five messages $20 USD.
    Act now before I get bored with the idea.

  11. My God, what moronic drivel comes leaking out the keyboard of that limey! Going on and on with his high-school fixated pseudo intellectualism that comes from reading the lyrics of a marginally successful rock band? Wow, that’s deep, limey! Next we’ll be discussing how the lyrics from Nina’s 99 Luft Ballons are really a metaphor for the firebombing of Dresden.
    He is just another example of the Old European envy bubbling up due to one of their former colonies far exceeding the wildest dreams of “the motherland.” In other words, they hate the fact that America is the greatest hippy-dippy country in the world and we don’t have to give a flying ronin what other countries think if we don’t agree with them. They should be happy that not agreeing does not always equal carpet bombing.

  12. Frank,
    I really think Limey needs his own section on IMAO now. Maybe an “Ask The Limey” area where we can find out all the intricacies of bands like Rage Against My Toothbrush and the like.

  13. BTW, we should contrast this limey with the vast majority of Brits who, though they might not always agree, have the good sense to keep their gobs shut. They want the same things as most Americans, freedom and a good standard of living and recognize that truly evil people like Hussein and OBL must be eliminated from the face of the earth. They have stood with us in conflicts that were both popular and unpopular. We like these Brits and thank them. Ronin the limeys.

  14. Just to answer your question – yes, there is an Old Zealand. (Zeeland, actually.) It’s in Holland. They’ve been acting pretty French lately (I think the Hague was sighted there recently) but I don’t believe they have any monkeys. At least not any obvious ones – it’s possible that they’re the secret Dutch Masters.

  15. Frnak:
    I challenge your lexicon, ronin! “Blimey Times Three!” is the hippy-dippy linguini!
    For Limey 4.0, could we try “lubricate,” “rutabaga,” or “piebald?”
    Have a nice day, and I mean that in a nice way.

  16. I don’t know about a pet limey. I’d have to constantly hear about third rate bands from the ninties, which would piss me off royally. I mean, I’d say, “Hey you want to listen to some Pumpkins, Stones, or Hank Williams?,” and they’d say, “No, I must hear more Rage, more, more, MORE!” Then I’d have to slap them around with a newspaper. Whenever I’d play music which was vastly superior than Rage, my pet limey would pee on the carpet, and I’d have to rub their nose in it. Or whenever I’d take my pet limey on a walk (limey leash laws), I’d have to constantly keep them from trying to help out our local bums. Also I don’t think that my pit bull Rumsfeld would get along well with him.
    No, I don’t think that a pet limey is for me. However if you hear anything about a pet French Maid in her late teens, early twenties, let me know. The place is getting a little dirty.

  17. RottsoRuck,
    I thought I was the only one who saw the symbolism in “99 Luft Ballons” as it pertains to our horrific bombing of Dresden. On top of which, Nina has talent, more than Rage Against the Machine could claim.

  18. Nice job Frank, but let me just kick him once:
    Limey says that music tells him “there is no other pill to take, so swallow the one that makes you ill”.
    Limey, you just need to quit looking for pills to take, get up and brush your linguini-stained teeth, and go get a hippy-dippy job!! You’re ill because you’re not contributing anything to your fellow human beings. No, wanking to Rage Against The Machine doesn’t count.

  19. If we’re going to get our ideologies from songs, why not pick something nice from Wierd Al Yankovic. The conservatives will like his humor, the liberals will like that he’s in California, and the communists will think, with a name like Yankovic, he must be one of them.

  20. Liberty Bob:
    How about “Genius in France”?
    I may not be the sharpest hunk of cheese
    I got a negative number on my SATs
    I’m not good looking and I don’t know how to dance
    But nevertheless and in spite of the evidence I am still widely considered to be
    A genius in France, a genius in France, a genius in France

    Question is, do I have to pay Michael Moore royalties for using his theme song?

  21. “we still from the indigenous people”
    Misspelling “steal” but spelling “indigenous” correctly! That’s just mean. The poor ‘fellar’ cannot even get the blatant jokes; you know he’s going to miss the subtle ones.

  22. Speaking of hypocritical musicians. I heard an article on NPR yesterday where MTV and some musicians are up in arms because a clothing store for kids called Urban Outfiters has a shirt that says “Voting is for Old People.” So Al Jorgensen of Ministry comes on and says that it’s a “disgusting attempt to profit from cynicism.” Isn’t that what Ministry and MTV are? Am I just crazy?

  23. Frnak
    To confuse the Limey, ask him if he’s'”Taking the piss”.
    Not sure what it means, as this is secret limey slang, but he will be scared that you know it.
    Also, “Grotty wanking Oik” is a term of endearment you may want to use to calm him down.

  24. frank you’re killin me. this guys so funny, im starting to wonder if you’re actually the limey. ooo what a twist. obviously not tho cuz he sounds so stupid.
    your biggest fan
    mt

  25. Limey Baby:
    Yes, we have many poor people in Amurka. In Texas, we call them middle-class. They live in houses, many of which they own. They have at least one car.(In Texas, most of them are pick-ups.) 99% of the poor own at least one television, and eat barbecue (mmmmmmm! barbecue!)at least once or twice a week at a restaurant.
    Compare this with the poor in jolly old England, who DONT HAVE A POT TO PISS IN OR WINDOW TO THROW IT OUT OF. (oops, sorry for the screaming. Screaming offends liberals, i understand)
    I dont believe anyone has officially posted an invitation to you to come and visit us here in this country. If you do, please come to Texas first. I have my 9mm and 12 gauge loaded. Plan to stay a loooooooong time, you limey twit.
    P.S.
    I’m sure Liberty Bob and the Angry Texan would also to shoo, er, see you also.
    (Begins loading 12 gauge rounds with nail heads)

  26. Frank, you need to separate the Limey emails into their own section. I want readers of my blog to read them, but it’s a pain to explain how to find each one, in order, etc. Would that be possible?
    BTW, definitely the funniest thing ever to happen on IMAO.

  27. I base my political philosophy on the wisdom of Weird Al Yankovic:
    “Another One Rides the Bus” is a parody illustrating the oppression of African Americans in the time of segregation, and how it took somebody like Rosa Parks to make a stand against its immorality.
    Either that, or a parody of a song by Queen.

  28. Frank you are so lucky. I have to try and think about what to write and this Limey just writes it for you! Can you tell if he is reading your responses…I would figure that he wasn’t or he wouldn’t keep beating himself up by sending you material to mock him with. I hope he doesn’t stop back!
    If he dries up just e-mail him a picture of some dying peasants, claim the U.S. military industrial machine caused it, to increase revenue at giant corporations so that they can pay a dividend to rich lazy republicans and wind him up again.
    You’ve struck gold!

  29. Brilliantly funny Frank, but this shot might have been a bit too direct. Even a Blimey Limey might be smart enough to pick up on the Toby Keith lyrics — not exactly over anyone’s head with that one, I don’t think. Might have been better to go with a Madonna “like a virgin” reference, just to keep him hooked.
    Anyway, I liked the comment in issue #2 about the poor “some of them juggle”. Absolutely masterful.
    Ask him if he’ll send you some chips!

  30. I bet our Socialist Briton friend doesn’t have anything resembling a social life whatsoever. Probably hasn’t even been kissed. Only the Shut-in Linux nerd-types bother arguing with someone over the Internet for this long. One thing that pisses me off is the costant barrage of “AMERIKKKA IS FACIST!!1!!11!” opinions from people who probably haven’t even set foot on US soil, but just rely on editorials by Labour Party members and reports from the BBC (Biased Bullshit Channel) to decide what we are. If we’re Facist, then why the hell are our media outlets allowed to criticize the state endlessly without censorship, no matter how rediculous the accusations get? If we’re Facist, then why have the Democrats been allowed to flame George Bush for over 2 years without one of them being assassinated? WAKE UP. Facist countries never have tolerance for more than one party, one opinion, and one supreme commander who completely censors any opposition directed towards him.
    Nonetheless, the Soci-Limey is once again the funniest thing to come out of England since Monty Python.

  31. I don’t know about you guys, but isn’t there something hilariously funny about a band that spends all their time decrying the hateful murderous despotic rule of a country that has never once tried to kill them. hell, if we are all they say we are, then they sure as hell better be in a great hiding place…but I don’t think that is it either because i am sure that they desecrated a perfectly good U2 concert i went to in 98…

  32. anybody wanna guess how old this kid is? i say 15, maybe 16 at the most. Mob i agree, probably never been kissed or left the country. frank im bettin all the other, lesser bloggers out there are furious this guys makin it so easy for you

  33. And he’s probably a Goth, to boot.
    Create your own Goth Poetry with the Goth-O-Matic Poetry Generator.
    Remembrance of My Death
    Around, all around, the shadows gather.
    My dread grows as the headsman’s axe falls against my naked soul.
    It wounds me, and darkly my vitae drips to the wicked earth that is my prison.
    In a strange and terrible glee I dance while nothingness surrounds me.
    Now alone, my cascade of tears falls upon dead eyes.
    This is my salvation

  34. Damn. I want one of those limeys. They’re absolutely hysterical! But then, I always did like Dr. Who… Hey, wait a minute. NOBODY could possibly REALLY be that stupid. You’re just making all of this up as you go along….

  35. Gee I prefer Metallica’s DON’T TREAD on ME:
    iberty or death, what we so proudly hail
    Once you provoke her, rattling of her tail
    Never begins it, never, but once engaged
    Never surrenders, showing the fangs of rage
    Don’t tread on me
    So be it
    Threaten no more
    To secure peace is to prepare for war
    So be it
    Settle the score
    Touch me again for the words that you will hear evermore
    Don’t tread on me
    Love it or live it, she with the deadly bite
    Quick is the blue tongue, forked as the lighting strike
    Shining with brightness, always on surveillance
    The eyes, they never close, emblem of vigilance
    Don’t tread on me
    So be it
    Threaten no more
    To secure peace is to prepare for war
    So be it
    Settle the score
    Touch me again for the words that you will hear evermore
    Don’t tread on me
    So be it
    Threaten no more
    To secure peace is to prepare for war
    Liberty or death, what we so proudly hail
    Once you provoke her, rattling
    of her tail
    So be it
    Threaten no more
    To secure peace is to prepare for war
    So be it
    Settle the score
    Touch me again for the words that you will hear evermore
    Don’t tread on me
    Words and Music by James Hetfield and Lars Ulrich
    Copyright ® 1991 Creeping Death Music (ASCAP)
    International Copyright Secured All Rights Reserved

  36. Man, I always just assumed that people in other countries were stupid/retarded/commie/hippie/french/or and combination of the five. But now we have proof, and I didn’t even have to leave my home. Dam glad we invented the Internet.

  37. Better hate mail than mine

    Frank J. gets more hate mail than me, and his hate mail is crazier than the stuff I get anyway. If you haven’t been following IMAO lately, you should check out the string of episodes involving a limey! Episode I…

  38. “My only fear is that the limey will stop writing back. This stuff is nearly the funniest you’ve ever penned. Keep it up.”
    Angry Texan:
    Not ALL non-US citizens are “stupid/retarded/commie/hippie/french/or and combination of the five”
    matt: Metallica rule! It’s no wonder they aren’t that popular in France…
    On the NEW subject…
    New York – Where’s York? (Scotland maybe?)
    New Holland – Holland = Dutch
    New Zealand – Zealand (See above post.)
    New England – obvious really…
    New South Wales – South Wales, that’s pretty specific (I wonder what South Wales looks like, probably nothing like Australia!)
    New Hampshire – Hampshire (place in England.)
    New Jersey – Jersey (another place in England.)
    New Mexico – obvious…
    Finally and most importantly:
    RATM suck ass! They are a walking epitome of hypocrisy. They are US citizens playing commie music. Do you think they would ever have got where they are in China, North Korea, Vietnam or Soviet-era Russia? F*** NO! They use deluded teenage losers, like Limey here, to make a buck singing about things that would prevent them from singing! It’s crazy.
    Frank J. keep f***ing up this dickwad’s head! It’s close to imploding…

  39. “My only fear is that the limey will stop writing back. This stuff is nearly the funniest you’ve ever penned. Keep it up.”
    Angry Texan:
    Not ALL non-US citizens are “stupid/retarded/commie/hippie/french/or and combination of the five”
    matt: Metallica rule! It’s no wonder they aren’t that popular in France…
    On the NEW subject…
    New York – Where’s York? (Scotland maybe?)
    New Holland – Holland = Dutch
    New Zealand – Zealand (See above post.)
    New England – obvious really…
    New South Wales – South Wales, that’s pretty specific (I wonder what South Wales looks like, probably nothing like Australia!)
    New Hampshire – Hampshire (place in England.)
    New Jersey – Jersey (another place in England.)
    New Mexico – obvious…
    Finally and most importantly:
    RATM suck ass! They are a walking epitome of hypocrisy. They are US citizens playing commie music. Do you think they would ever have got where they are in China, North Korea, Vietnam or Soviet-era Russia? F*** NO! They use deluded teenage losers, like Limey here, to make a buck singing about things that would prevent them from singing! It’s crazy.
    Frank J. keep f***ing up this dickwad’s head! It’s close to imploding…

  40. On the subject of music, it was pleasing to see that even an old-school whiney Limey pinko like Joe Strummer can grow up and grow a brain! If you notice at the end of the spectacular “Black Hawk Down” (directed by a Limey remarkably – they aren’t all bad), Joe weighs in with a wonderful version of the auld Irish ditty “The Minstrel Boy”. One of the last things he did before he died I gather, which really helps make up for all the ludicrous embarrassing crapola he did in the ’80s like “Working For The Clampdown”. I get quite teary hearing Joe bellowing
    “Land of song” cried the warrior bard,
    “though all the world betrays thee,
    one sword, at least, thy rights shall guard,
    one faithful harp shall praise thee!”
    I’m happy to report that I can’t help thinking of America when I hear that – especially post-9/11. I am getting choked up right now in fact, and am going to go drink a nice expensive Irish whisky. Erin go bragh!

  41. hey i’m from the UK, rage are the greatest band ever to come out of your corporate country. it’s ok 4 you to talk about living a comfortable life, with your job at ‘something corporate’. the US lifestyle stinks, i feel sorry for you guys, you think your free, ha, you only know how to take other peoples freedom. OBL was a great leader, know who’s the one shooting coffee out their nose. you facist wanna be’s, the thing is your too busy, buying your designer clothing, heck it looks terrible, go for quality, not name. Stop following everyone else, or are you too damn weak to make your own choices? thought so. i’m glad i’m not in the US, i like living a free life.

  42. Hey, the ever-stinking LIMEY posted right here! So, besides being 14, spotty, and malformed physically and psychologically, what do you do for fun? Oh that’s right, you’re a pinko, and therefore have no sense of fun or humour.
    Hope one of your next smack shots is a hot one, you baby-diddling scum. Hope you end up on a slab soon, another pointless blob of life-hating protoplasm. Pfft!

  43. Oh, BTW I’m between jobs right now, but fortunately I’m not lazy or stupid like you Limeys, so should have something nice again really soon. Blaming other people for my situation has never been my forte either, so I maintain an extreemely positive attitude about it.
    Back to the one-hand mags for you now, you sad sack of s***! 🙂

    • Limey’s definition of “Fascist” (the inarticulate person’s fallback term; I was once called a “musical Fascist” because I said I hated Bob Dylan): anyone who cherishes freedom.
    • The Limey’s definition of “great leader”: anyone who murders in order to decrease freedom, e.g. bin Laden.
      I have uncovered the nature of Limey’s deformity: his brain is wired backwards!
  44. As of yesterday, I had not experienced the so called ms (messy screen) syndrom. Your reply changed all of that.
    “I think if you look at it carefully, it’s a commentary about how unfair our social class system is and that the oppression of the poor can’t go on forever. Or, maybe I’m just reading it all wrong and it’s actually about how small your penis is.”
    I cannot put into words the feelings of mirth that welled up inside of me upon the reading of that sentance. This is both a happy and a sad moment for me, for though this has confirmed what I already knew; that you are indeed the funniest blogger on the internet, I cannot see how you will ever be able to top it.
    Please don’t stop trying.

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