The IMAO Presidential Endorsement

Posted by on

In the course of this long campaign, you’ve been asking yourself one question, “Who will IMAO tell me to vote for?” Well, that time has come, and the person you should vote for is President George W. Bush.

Domestically, he has given me tax cuts.

He may have done lots of spending, but I don’t know how that affects me so I don’t care.

Most importantly, though, he’s killed terrorists.

Even stopping the evil Saddam.

The war on terrorism is very important, so he even teamed up with great allies like Tony Blair.

Together they fought terrorists and ninjas.

Bush’s opponent, Senator John Kerry, is scared of terrorists and ninjas.

That’s why I enthusiastically endorse Bush and say that Kerry is a goober. We need four more years of tax cuts and dead terrorists.

No Comments

  6. And to think, I spent all of that time over the past 6 months, reading newspapers, news magazines, watching news programs, surfing the political blogs, trying to figure out who to vote for, and all I had to do was wait for today and let you tell me how to vote. We’ll I’ll know next time.
    Actually I knew who I’d vote for, or at least who I’d vote against in this election, back in ’84.

    Reply to this comment

  10. I don’t know which endorsement has surprised me more – yours or Sully’s …I’m just gonna have sit down and assess my evaluative skills.
    OT, but there is great new Bush ad I saw today – part of his speech at the convention -THAT be a powerful ad (don’t I sound like John Kerry when I say that?)

    Reply to this comment

  19. phew i already voted, luckily i voted as the mighty frank has commanded. i don’t know what came over me, voting before someone told me how to vote. you know how we idiot americans can’t do anything good or do it properly all by ourselves.
    /sarcasm

    Reply to this comment

  21. Dear Tim,
    What do Ninjas have to do with anything? Prime Minister Koizumi of Japan has been a staunch ally of the U.S. and President Bush from day one of the war on terror. On Bush’s first visit to Japan he gave Bush a painting of the President riding a horse, Potus all decked out in Samurai gear, and shooting arrows at the enemy. If you could understand Japanese you’d realize he and his government have been positively Blair-like (and Howard-like) in their support of an ally in word. If you could read Japanese newspapers you’d realize how Koizumi and his government have driven the vocal minority and MSM here bonkers through orchestrating Japan’s support of the U.S. in deed. He has actually publicly stated his preference for Bush over Kerry recently. In fact Ninjas would be directly kicking some terrorist butt except for the fact of article 9 of the Japanese Constitution, imposed on Japan by some Kerry-ish members of the State Departments after World War 2, which disallows said butt-kicking. Be this as it may, and the Constitution is on its way to being amended, “Ninjas” are with the coalition not the terrorists, the U.N., or France!
    Sincerely,
    A friend of a few Ninjas.

    Reply to this comment

  28. Dear Editor,
    You must understand it is four in the morning over here in Japan and I have been drinking all night. The mistake was because I scrolled up to learn the name of the wonderful creator of this wonderful blog’s superb entry and passed out on the way up. When I awoke I was at the name Tim and thought he was the person I was commenting to. Not coherent enough to realize he was like me but a mere reader of this fantastic blog. In any case, before I pass out agai

    Reply to this comment

  41. Frank,
    Thank you for the n. I feel awake enough now to pour myself another drink and toast your wise endorsement. (But for historical accuracy I do wish you’d get the Ninjas on the proper side of the fight. They got Bush and Blair’s back!) America: make P.M. Koizumi’s day–vote Bush!!

    Reply to this comment

  42. Thanks for making this choice easy to understand. I’m a conservative, and so I don’t understand nuanced positions on issues. I need stick drawings so that I can see what to do.
    Hang on, my Karl Rove brain stem implant is beeping…must go…

    Reply to this comment

  44. Hey y.i.e,
    You said Koizumi “gave Bush a painting of the President riding a horse, Potus all decked out in Samurai gear, and shooting arrows at the enemy”
    Can you dig up a jpg of it? I’d love to see that!

    Reply to this comment

  50. “Four more years of tax cuts and dead terrorists.”
    YES! I’ve yet to hear a more simply and precisely correct explanation of why to vote for George Bush. Is it too late to make a tee-shirt?

    Reply to this comment

  55. P.M. Koizumi has been more of a Samauri than a ninja. Samauri do things honorably, while ninjas are sneaky and do what they do for the highest bidder (French ninjas?). I don’t think the reference to ninjas reflect the actions of P.M. Koizumi in any way.

    Reply to this comment

  58. Dead terrorists are only to be shown blown to bits. Arms ,legs and heads blown apart, unrecognizable by grandmothers or Yasser. You showed their bodies intact. In direct violation of Karl Rove’s Prime Directive #5.

    Reply to this comment

  60. I find it interesting that our snide liberal art critic has no sense of humor or sarcasm. Its just like Al Gores “HEE PLAYED ON OUR FEARS!!” OR TED KENNEDYS “THE WAR WAS CONCOCTED IN TEXAS FOR POLITICAL PURPOSES!!”. Those are NOT mean spirited but bringing up a 19 year voting record or stating the fact that “If we make the wrong decision we risk being attacked again by terrorists” is mean and spiteful. Those wasawwy wepubwicans!!!

    Reply to this comment

  61. The comment about Koizumi and honor and his being more like a samurai than a ninja is entirely true. But such fine historical sensibilities most people lack. My only point was that “ninja” often equals “Japanese” in the popular conscience and I wanted to draw attention to the fact of Japan’s unyielding support of the U.S. during the war on terror (including Iraq!). If you read my first comment on this subject I did try to bring “Samurai” into the mix.

    Reply to this comment

  62. y.i.e.
    PM Koizumi has been a shining star in a constellation of good allies, too bad the left and the MSM in this country has lost the balls to report truth about warrior-statesmen like Koizumi.
    Kerry doesn’t deserve to walk among the US and coalition forces let alone command them.

    Reply to this comment

  63. I’m with you Frank – some people need guidance today – I had to explain the benefits of the electoral college to 3 of my co-workers, and I basically said the same thing – if you are for tax cuts and killing terrorists, vote for Bush. (I threw Social Security in there too – younger workers) So there are a few more votes for Bush.
    Wow – Frank J. and I on the same page – it is like getting a peak of heaven. : )

    Reply to this comment

  64. y.i.e.
    PM Koizumi has been a shining star in a constellation of good allies, too bad the left and the MSM in this country has lost the balls to report truth about warrior-statesmen like Koizumi.
    Kerry doesn’t deserve to walk among the US and coalition forces let alone command them.

    Reply to this comment

  67. Hello,
    This is my first visit here and I was surprised to see that you are an idiot. After reading the comments I find that you are not alone, there are a lot of idiots here to keep you company.
    Don’t forget to enlist! Your country needs you!

    Reply to this comment

  69. Edward,
    It’s a mix of sake and Jack. Delicious. And you are so right about the MSM and the left. And clutch cargo. It is now well into the morning over here in Japan and I really must go to sleep. Thankfully it is Saturday and I don’t have to go to work. Again. America make Koizumi’s day: vote Bush!

    Reply to this comment

  71. This is an endorsement of John Kerry right? I’m assuming that the child’s scrawl in which this is presented is meant to remind the reader that Bush’s (and many of his supporters) understanding of world events operates at a child’s level.

    Reply to this comment

  75. As we have had so many comments on your artistic and mental talent, tonight, Frank, I just wanted to mention that “Frank the Artist” is one of my favorite categories of all time, along with “IMW”! And if the loony left has their disdainful feathers ruffled, you must be doing something right!! Thank you for the funny!

    Reply to this comment

  76. Translation of Frank (obviously too nuanced) for Scott:
    As stated in New Testament:
    Render unto Caesar those things that are Caesar’s, and to God those things that are God’s. IOW: Kill terrorists and thank God for our success in killing terrorists.
    As stated by Founding Father:
    Give me liberty or give me death. IOW: Kill terrorists.
    As stated by Julie:
    Kill more terrorists, faster please. Oh! And thanks for not taking any more of my money in taxes than is required to KILL MORE TERRORISTS FASTER.

    Reply to this comment

  79. You cannot argue with logic like that.
    Excellent endorsement. There should be a rule that all political endorsements should include stick figures. Very hard to obfuscate when the idea must be conveyed by sticks and circles!

    Reply to this comment

  82. y.i.e.,
    I think that what Frank was referring to in his cartoons was evil ninjas. Good ninjas will stand with the samurai and the Coalition. Just so you know. 🙂
    (Can you imagine what it would have been like if Frank had gotten it into his head to get into giant mecha?)

    Reply to this comment

  87. Frank, you also picked up an endorsement at Polipundit. It was tested by an eight year old who really liked it. He thought it was hilarious that the Ninjas were the only ones wearing clothes. I bet they were evil MONKEY Ninjas in disguise. I too voted early on Monday…straight Republican ticket insteqd of my Republican, Libertarian Split. The monkey business has gotten out of hand. I suspect FrankJ keeps his cartoon style as simple as he can get it so the Trolls won’t slobber so much as they try to understand it.

    Reply to this comment

  89. REally, I think we shouldn’t care what the trolls (liberals) think … I mean, do any of them own guns? What are they gonna do, come after us with their Dixie Chicks Cds? If a war between the left and right occured, Barbara Strienstand wouldn’t even come OUT of her air conditioned mansion.

    Reply to this comment

  92. Simply pathetic. I think you need to draw as well some of the 1000 american soldiers that Bush sent to die in Irak (not with the smiling face, I guess). The iraqui children and women killed there maybe would deserve also one of your drawings. And what about Osama Bin Laden?, he was responsible of 11-S, Did you forget him (like Bush did)?. Al Qaeda killed 3000 people in America and you are proud because your president killed some ninjas. Human intelligence is amazing.

    Reply to this comment

  94. I don’t want to get too deep or too serious for this website but….
    Eduard (if you’re still here), we all know war stinks. I have alot of friends who are military and I’ve seen some death. But doing nothing is not the solution. “We don’t want war so let’s not take action” is a very poor response and is not what the people who frequent this site want to see in the leader of this nation. If John Kerry were our President in the early 1940s, I believe Hitler would have conquered most of the world. Even then we probably didn’t get in soon enough; we waited until U.S. soil was attacked (was it wrong for us to declare war on nations who had already declared war on us?).
    What you need to understand is that we all want peace. But the opposite of peace isn’t war. The opposite of peace is confusion.
    It’s easy to look at problems and throw the blame on anybody convenient, but it does not solve anything. It actually adds to confusion. Sometimes action is necessary.
    By the way. When our troops were over there during the Clinton administration and many died because we had backed off and were engaged with half-measures, did the death bother you so much? Or do you think it didn’t happen because the networks you watch didn’t talk about it as much on the news? Have you though this through, or did the TV tell you what to believe?
    By the way, many of the people on this webste understand these things better than you. It’s just not a debate format; they’re just bowing off steam and trying to have fun. Personal attacks do not help your argument; they usually just help to undermine it when the audience is intelligent.

    Reply to this comment

  98. The iraqui children and women killed
    there maybe would deserve also one of
    your drawings.
    I wonder whether you think the million Iraqi men, women and children tortured, raped and murdered by Saddam and his brutal thug sons deserve so much as a stick-figure drawing in remembrance. I wonder whether you think the mass graves deserve a cartoon panel. Probably not.

    Reply to this comment

  100. Kerry has a record of Anti American conduct ,,Anti Military and anti Support for the Military ..He is supported by The American Communist Party and the Un American Civil Liberty`s Union ..He spoils everything he comes in contact with ,,,He will destroy our Country for his associates …He gave comfort to the Enemy in time of War …..

    Reply to this comment

  101. As a firefighter/emt, veteran airborne ranger, and have an i.q. of 134, I cannot vote for Bush. He was opposed to the Department of Homeland Security when it was proposed by Clinton – then 9/11 happened – then it was a GREAT IDEA! (flip/flop anyone???) During his term he has failed balance the budget, he has run up the national debt, read http://www.newamericancentury.org – its a neocon website – and notice Rumsfeld’s proposed U.S. policy toward iraq dated 1998 – its strikingly similar to our current policy – only it makes no reference to WMDs. But, I guess Bush does have the NASCAR endorsement, and that is the best qualifier for leader of the free world!

    Reply to this comment

  102. If I may reply to ” ,” the brave EMT/Ranger who couldn’t be bothered to leave his name…
    “Four More Years of Tax Cuts and Dead Terrorists.”
    ‘Nuff said. If you’re not for dead terrorists, what ARE you for?

    Reply to this comment

  104. …and what does IQ have to do with common sense or real-world intelligence? I run a college bookstore; I see IQs higher than 134 every other faculty member, and I wouldn’t trust many of them to balance my checkbook. And your “NASCAR” crack just shows that you’re a biased pseudointellectual prig who gets his kneejerk reactions from other pseudointellectuals who think ANY form of mass entertainment that isn’t “classical” is declasse’.
    And considering the popularity of NASCAR amongst people North and South, and this political structure we call “Democracy” values one vote no more or less than another, maybe it IS the best qualifier for the leader of the free world. Or do you believe that YOUR opinion is worth more than mine?
    (For the record: IQ 140, Hospice volunteer, and voting Republican for president for the first time. Because I don’t think terrorism is something one can “police.”)

    Reply to this comment

  106. Wonderduck, Sorry about omitting my name. I am for a prosperous economy, in the U.S.. Not exporting jobs. The United States has a higher standard of living because American workers have historically had higher unemployment rates and higher wages than most other nations. Under Bush unemployment has gone up and wages have not kept up with inflation while costs for health care, energy, raw goods – those things that make our standard of living better than the rest of the world – have greatly out-paced inflation. Put a lot of thought into the vote you cast, its a privledge earned by the blood of those who serve our Great Nation. The vote you cast should not be taken lightly, it is not a popularity contest for the best good-ol’-boy, or the candidate with the best ads. Please take time to read the candidates policies, study the effects of those policies on our nation. Make an INFORMED decision. Campaign rhetoric and ads are only used to gain the position. What the elected official actually does – “By, of, and for the people” is what matters.

    Reply to this comment

  107. I’d thank you not to talk down to me, Sarge. Assuming that I haven’t read the candidates’ policies, or that I think this is a popularity contest only, and that I’m making an “uninformed decision” is fairly rude. I don’t know why, but I had HOPED for something better from you.
    My vote ISN’T cast lightly, and I know exactly what it cost for us to be able to use that vote: my grandfather, one of my uncles, a great uncle, and two cousins.
    And in THIS election, I’m a single-issue voter, Sarge. The economy isn’t going to fail anytime soon, unemployment is almost back to the pre-recession levels of 2001(according to an AP story from 10/28. Heck, my personal wages have actually gone UP substantially since then), and our standard of living is STILL better than the rest of the world.
    So the single issue in my mind? To put it flippantly, “dead terrorists.” Oh, I could also say that John Kerry instills me with as much confidence as a piece of string cheese, but that’s beside the point.
    And, as others have pointed out in other places, bin Laden’s latest videotape echoes many of the Left’s standard talking points. If THAT’S the company they keep, I’ll vote for Bush quite happily, thank you very much.

    Reply to this comment

  108. The United States has a higher standard of living because American workers have historically had higher unemployment rates … Under Bush unemployment has gone up
    huh? so that’s good right?
    What the elected official actually does – “By, of, and for the people” is what matters.
    and what did Kerry do the last 20 years in the senate? I missed his healthcare ,social security , and intelligence reform bills.(also noticed that he hasn’t shown up to vote for other’s bills on these issues this year) I also missed Clinton’s homeland security proposal. could you cite these for me? I’ve been huntin’ for ’em but can’t seem to find them.

    Reply to this comment

  109. August 6, 2001:”Bin Laden determined to Attack In US”
    Action by President Bush: Absolutely Nothing
    Yep, this is the man with foresight I want protecting me. What are the PDBs saying now? What is Bush ignoring today?

    Reply to this comment

  111. Now I’m hungry for String Cheese. Thanks.
    And don’t EVEN talk about anything positive Clinton wanted to do for the protection of America. IF he wanted some “homeland security” org. it must have been in some rare and latent sense of GUILT over selling out America to Communists for more campaign money!
    Get the facts Bucko!
    p.s. I LOVE “sKerry!” Who came up with that!?

    Reply to this comment

  112. Stracke said ‘August 6, 2001:”Bin Laden determined to Attack In US” ‘
    Yes, there WAS such a threat. Never mind the FACTS that it didn’t say anything about target, method, time period of the attack, or indeed, any sort of information that the US could react to, other than bin Laden wanted to kill Americans… and we already KNEW that, since he had done it quite a bit during the Clinton years.
    Stracke went on to blather: “Action by President Bush: Absolutely Nothing.”
    Right. Because if he HAD decided to react to that article, he’d’ve been laughed out of town without something firm to work from. WE HAD NO SUCH INFORMATION.
    How is this hard to understand? WHY is this hard to understand? Good lord, look at the 3+ years since 9/11: when al-Qaeda threatens, they DON’T DO ANYTHING! When they attack some place, they don’t announce it first.
    I know your reaction is simply knee-jerk Bush hating, but c’mon, rub two neurons together for once. There are plenty of things to attack W with, don’t go reaching for something that weak.
    And then Ted had the unmitigated stupidity to say “He kills terrorists? OBL was alive last time I checked.”
    Ted? ObL is not the only terrorist in the world, bucko. And there are a helluva lot fewer of them now, due to Afghanistan and Iraq. Indeed, I’d be perfectly happy with ObL living, if he’s the ONLY terrorist living. Of course, can’t expect much more from someone who’s last name is probably “Rall.”
    …and yes, I’m talking down to you guys. Intentionally. Until you can bring a valid argument to the Adults, you get to sit at the kiddy table.

    Reply to this comment

  114. hey frank it’s me Tamika from sarahk’s trip to l.v anyway she sent me a link to your sight and i think you are hilarious. by the way i would like a t-shirt. oh and i guess i’ll keep my political opinions to myself. i’ll just sit back and read your web-site and lol.

    Reply to this comment

  116. MAKE THE DIFFERENCE!!
    From The Los Angeles Times:
    “Nationwide, at least two polls in the last week showed that newly registered voters favored Democratic presidential candidate John F. Kerry by double-digit margins. The Massachusetts senator holds an even greater lead, the polls found, among voters 29 and younger– The conclusion is that the new voters and younger voters favor Kerry by a large margin, but historically they don’t actually bother to vote. If they do this time, it could make a big difference.”
    Your vote is essential!
    GET TO THE POLLS — VOTE ON TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 2ND!!
    AND VOTE FOR KERRY!!!!
    Why? Check this out: http://www.thenation.com/doc.mhtml?i=20041108&s=facts
    Send the above message to your friends, including those at other schools. Urge them to
    VOTE FOR KERRY!!
     YOU CAN MAKE THE DIFFERENCE IN THIS ELECTION!
    http://www.moveon.org/front/ has put together the numbers and information you need if someone tries to stop you from exercising your right to vote.

    Reply to this comment

  118. Sorry for the ” delay ” Herb…
    OK here we go ;
    Americans free , prosperous and alive =
    GOOD
    You , american ,free, prosperous and alive =
    GOOD
    terrorists killing americans =
    BAD
    terrorists killing you ( even if we don’t think alike )=
    BAD
    This completes lesson # 1
    Thank you Herb.

    Reply to this comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.