Ma Deuce Gunner, one of our brave soldiers currently in Iraq, has a moving story about an Iraqi patriot.
Apparently, some people require very basic enumeration of things to not stick into their mouths, so Brian J. has some help for the idiots out there.
Mean Mr. Mustard has good news from Iraq. All I can say is heh. (PG-13)
That’s all for tonight. Be honorable, ronin.
Archive of entries posted on 24th March 2005
Starving Songs
I often hear about songs to listen to while studying or driving. So I came up with some song lists related to starving.
Songs to listen to while starving your wife.
- I used to love her, but I had to kill her. (she got so inconvenient and after all I want to be the husband to the mother of my kids) – by Gun N Roses
- Hungry like the wolf. – by Duran Duran
- Stop (feeding her) in the name of love. – by the Supremes, the three women not the Stupid Court
- Live and let (slowly) die. – by Wings
Songs to listen to while your adulterous husband is starving you.
- Eat it. – by Weird Al Yankovich
- She’s got you. (and hey, she’s got your kids too) – by some country singer
- You don’t own me. (but you can still kill me) – by…I forget, but they sang it on ‘the First Wives’s Club’
Of course I’m sure there are more. So why not tell me in the comments?
Fun Trivia
Forging Ahead
Another obviously forged memo? (full details of the memo here) Has the media learned nothing? This time it’s about some supposed repulbican [sic] talking points on the Terri Shivo [sic] case, and Patrick Hynes wants a name for this scandal. I suggest “Super Fakey Talking Point Scandal Number One!”
Anyway, the American media is important to a working democracy, so I’ve decided to help out by explaining to the MSM how to make more competent forgeries. I’ve been forging things since an early age including pirate treasure maps, UFO photos, Syrian passports, and Bolvian currency. I even forged my own Rathergate memo– much more competently than CBS. Thus, I’ve learned a thing or two allowing me to write this guide.
THE DOs AND DON’Ts OF FORGING MEMOS
RWD’s News Round-Up, Thursday
Hello, I’m RightWingDuck,
I’m here to share the news.
Good stuff going on.
A Catholic school in South Australia has suspended one of several teachers who, believe it or not, attended an LSD party.
At first, Catholic officials were furious. Then they realized they misread the invitation – they thought it had said, LDS party.
They were returned to duty and were ordered to drink lots of Coca Cola.
LSD is fine. Especially when the flashback comes in the official school colors.
In Boston, a man who escaped prison twenty years ago was captured by police. The man was a poet of the month, and spent a lot of time in front of microphones reciting his poetry.
Police suspected something was wrong when he won a prize for his last poem, “I can’t believe it’s been twenty years since I escaped prison.”
Beatniks thought it was a metaphor for marriage!
Fischer-Spassky Highlights
Pretentious chess nerd Bobby Fischer was freed Wednesday from the Japanese detention center where he’s been held for the last 9 months for having an invalid US passport.
Fischer originally gained fame in 1972 by defeating Russian chess champion Boris Spassky in a stunning upset, giving America a symbolic Cold War victory and high school chess club geeks a brief respite from their daily beatings.
20 years and 15,000 Thunderbird & Sterno martinis later, a very broke Fischer challenged Spassky to a rematch in Sarajevo, Yugoslavia in violation of international sanctions. Being down to his last bottle of cheap vodka, Spassky accepted, and the rest is history.
By which I mean it was quickly forgotten by all except the geeks who longed for those halcyon days of not being punched in the stomach every time they quoted Monty Python.
How I miss those days…
But to keep myself from pining away like a Norwegian Blue parrot, I thought I’d share (in the extended entry) some of my fondest memories that 1992 match: