The U.N. needs some work, including an image change. In the spirit of helpfulness, I came up with some brand new slogans for the U.N. (do they even have one now). Here they are:
PROPOSED SLOGANS FOR THE U.N.
* If a corrupt, bloated bureaucracy can’t solve it, then it’s best left festering.
* Genocidal dictators, beware our harshly worded letters.
* Having discussed at length almost every major crisis in the past 60 years.
* If our baby-blue helmets don’t scream seriousness, then are non-binding resolutions do.
* Chosen by 4 out of 5 oppressed peoples for peacekeeping over Sprite in a blind taste test.
* The U.N. – U.N.fair, U.N.balanced, U.N.medicated.
* Try our world famous cheesy fries.
* Defeating evil… as long as the cowardly French and the evil Chinese Commies don’t use their veto power.
* Pointless squabbling brought to an art form.
* Check with our job opportunities center for great benefits and embezzlement opportunities.
* If troubles abound, we’ll be nearby doing nothing.
* You can’t spell “unethical” without U.N.
* Honest; those people were raped before we got here.
* If you don’t like us, our 156-4 vote says it’s the fault of Israel.
* Ignoring the irony of cronies of pissant dictatorships voting in a democratic fashion for 60 years.
* If this is an emergency, please hang up and dial America.
The UN – Who else could get vaunted Cuba to serve on a committee for human rights?
The U.N., an idea whose time has gone.
The U.N., Solving the world’s problems one under the table payoff at a time.
The U.N., We didn’t invent red tape we made it longer and harder to cut. We also may have soiled it a little.
The U.N., For when talk is all you need.
Frank, you make this into a T-shirt and I’ll buy it TODAY! I’m going on a trip to Germany and Prague later this year, and I’d absolutely love to show it off there! MWA-HAHAHA!
Charles.
the U.N. – Hoping to turn Americans into U.N.Americans
I’ll kill you for stealing my thunder, spacemonkey!
U.N. – League of Nations Reloaded
Dammit now I want cheesy fries. Curse you!
Now I want cheesy fries. Curse you!
Sorry Frank, Yours were better I just got on a roll. And please no murder-death-kill.
Hard to beat Frank on this one….
How about – The UN, for when you need a totally useless and corrupt band of thieves with ridiculously weird names to confuse the herds of idiots who pay taxes in your country into thinking that there is ‘someone in charge’ and ‘being a watchdog’ in all dimensions of human existence on the Earth so the dumb sumbitches can sleep at night.
Posting in comments is slow. It timed out on me the first time and I had to repost, then saw that both posts got through 🙁
t-shirt material, well done
Kinda sucks that Frank J.’s gonna kill spacemonkey, I liked having him around. Except when he was throwing fecal matter.
My favorites:
* Having discussed at length almost every major crisis in the past 60 years.
* You can’t spell “unethical” without U.N.
* The U.N. – U.N.fair, U.N.balanced, U.N.medicated.
But the best one is:
* If this is an emergency, please hang up and dial America.
Definitely T-Shirt worthy.
“The best agression is passive agression.”
I’m w/Tracey – “if an emergency hang up and dail America” is CLASSIC!!! And good stuff too, Spacemonkey “the UN, when talk is all you need” LMAO!!!!
The U.N. if we didn’t waste the space who would?
A true slogan:
The U.N.–we’re not a very effective roadblock or counterbalance to the U.S., but we try our best and, if you’re a tin horn dictator, we’re the only one you’ve got (please ignore the fact that Saddam bribed us with billions of dollars in oil vouchers and we still couldn’t save him when push came to shove).
A more effective slogan (though untrue):
The U.N.–we now hate the French too.
“If a corrupt, bloated bureaucracy can’t solve it, then it’s best left festering.”
Words to live by!
“The best way to stay out of a rut is to walk in the middle of the road” – Mediocrates
Would that the UN should have such aspirations.
U.N. Because a 60% majority of dictatorships can’t be wrong.
*the UN – we’re going to rule the world someday, but only after Bill Clinton becomes General Secretary and supervises the nuclear destruction of America.
Drink 7up.