“I want to introduce my new Supreme Court nominee,” President Bush told his staff. John Roberts then walked into the room.
“That’s not a woman!” Cheney shouted.
“And he looks pretty white,” Alberto Gonzales said.
“I think he’s a white man!” Condoleezza Rice exclaimed, “Did you know you nominated a white man?”
“Why? What?” Bush asked, quite confused.
“No one is more unpopular these days than white men,” Cheney explained.
“But I’m a white man!” Bush responded.
“And you’re not polling well right now,” Condi stated, “but everyone loves me. I’m a black woman.”
“And I’m a torturing Mexican,” Alberto said, “I poll through the roof.”
“I’m sure you’ll all like me when you get to know me,” John Roberts said.
“Wow! He’s boring sounding!” Alberto declared, “You nominated a boring, stupid gringo, you boring, stupid gringo.”
“Aww,” Bush moaned, “I thought I picked a nominee good.”
“Back in my day, white men did everything,” grumbled Rumsfeld, “They even played basketball.”
“That’s not how things work now,” Cheney said, “Dubya, just take your nominee in front of the press and you’ll see.”

“So why did you think the best new nominee for the Supreme Court is some dumb cracker?” asked the first reporter.
“John Roberts has many great qualifications,” Bush answered, pointing to John Roberts who stood next to him.
“But you will not deny that he is, in fact, a honkey?”
“Now, I think you’ll all find I could make a great Supreme Court Justice if you just interview me,” John Roberts said.
“Everyone get close!” a reporter shouted, “I bet he’s about to say something extremist!”
The reporters all crowded around John Roberts. “Get those mikes away from me!” he yelled.
“He’s against freedom of speech!” shrieked one reporter, “He thinks the freedom of speech is un-Constitutional!”
“That’s not what I said,” John Roberts stated indignantly.
“Be careful,” cautioned another reporter, “I hear if you corner a white man and make him angry, he may lash out and sue!”

“Bush’s new Supreme Court Justice is one of the most destructive forces known,” said the TV announcer as the screen showed scenes of devastation, “a white man! Not only has John Roberts taken the extreme position of being white man, but he also is against the environment, labor, children, and women. With him in the Supreme Court, he won’t rest until all humanity is dead – except for the babies women didn’t want! Tell the White House now that John Roberts is an unacceptable extremist and a cracker.”
“That makes him seem at least a little interesting,” Bush said as he turned off the T.V. and went to bed.
“I told you you should have nominated a woman,” Laura responded.
Bush chuckled. “A woman judge; now that’s wacky.”