I totally called that. You NEVER say “I’ll be right back.” And you CERTAINLY don’t say it twice. And I did say exactly who would be behind that door.
BTW, I decided to take tonight off from 24 blogging. I didn’t want the 2-hour season finale to take us 4 hours to watch, because um… ALIAS series finale tonight. WHOA! Special guest star Merrin Dungey, are you kidding? Didn’t she die? Twice?
I’ll get to blogging 24 tomorrow some time. But you know, I’ve got cleaning, dog training, a massage, and probably a few seizures on the way tomorrow, so it might not be early.
Archive of entries posted on 22nd May 2006
Odds
According to Kentucky Derby winner and tragic lose of the Preakness Barbaro’s surgeon, the horse has a fifty-fifty change of survival.
That’s nice, but I’ll wait for Vegas to publish their odds before placing any bets.
I Love America
If you spend too much time watching politics you forget that the politicians are not America… other than that they run America… but only the unimportant parts… other than deploying the military, that is.
Okay, I already confused myself.
Anyway, my point, whether I can come up with an appropriate intro or not, is that, even though it seems like we have no heroes in politics right now, America is still full of heroes and things worth fighting for. We have the liberty earned by our forefathers, our innovation, our spirit, our awesome economy, and our general kick-assery – and that should be more than enough to get anyone out of bed and glad to be alive each morning. As bad as things may get in Washington and on the world stage, there’s always a supermarket nearby with at least eight different types of Oreo cookies to choose from – and this week they’re buy one get one free!
Maybe my point is that you should never forget that America is really really awesome. We have apple pies and right to carry laws. We have boundless opportunity and a Walgreens at every intersection. We have constant technical innovation and no native species of monkeys. And this is the only nation that has me! If you said there was another country even half as great as the United States, I’d punch you in your dumb, lying monkey face.
And you’d deserve it for such slander.
And did I mention that no military is better at killing its enemies than America’s military? We had all those years of “peace” during the Clinton years, and the military went right back to killing bad people without missing a beat. And, with new technology in the works, we’ll kill people in need of killing even more efficiently.
So be happy (unless you’re one of IMAO’s international readers; I don’t know how you should feel then). The United States of America still kicks ass. We must continue to fight for what’s right, but we should have smiles on our faces because we fight from positions of strength. And no matter what terrorists do, no matter how liberals try to weaken us and put this country down, the two-hour season finale of 24 will still air tonight.
Because we’re America.
Truthout to Change Name, Keep Format
Because only Guatemalans are illegal…
What do you do when your country is overwhelmed by illegal immigration?
In America you hunt them down and talk them into voting for you. In Mexico, they build more DETENTION CENTERS!!!
Here’s a headline right from the front page of our local spanish paper La Opinion (Motto: Habla Espanol?).
It turns that Mexico is having a bit of a problem dealing with illegal immigrants. Thankfully, it occured to them to send the illegals back. This is much better than creating an express lane to Tijuana, with a free pass to the underground tunnel.
Here’s a translation of the first few paragraphs.
Mexico will construct more deportation centers . Between 2002 and 2006 the total number of undocumenteds rose 74%.
The Mexican government plans to build at least 13 detention centers to deal with the increasing number of foreign migrants on their way to the United States. In the last 4 years this total has risen 74%.
There’s more.. it goes on to detail that …
Mexico has committed to an agreement with four other countries stipulating that deportation be safe, dignified, and fast.
…All deportations will occur within 24 hours. That is, between the time a person is caught and the time they are on a bus on their way back to their country, there should not pass more than 24 hours.”
Somebody call Harry Reid. Not only is Mexico forcing illegals to go back home but I’m sure that they aslo require the illegals to speak in Spanish. That has to be racist.
IMAO: The Place to Discuss the Issues
I think we here at IMAO should continue to encourage reader discussion… not just to drive up hits to the site so we can charge more with advertisers… but because we want to know what you think.
Today’s issue: Did you think the end to Huckleberry Finn was just tacked on? I mean, the book was great and seemed to cover many important themes, but it’s like Twain just ran out of ideas when he got to the end. Actually, after finishing the book, I just wanted to punch Mark Twain in his big stupid mustache.
Discuss amongst yourselves.
Having Your Chocolate and Eating It Too
I guess with his reelection, Mayor Ray Nagin is now the Marion Barry of the new millennium. This raises the important question: Do we really need a New Orleans for anything? I mean, people can get drunk and make women take off their tops for beads about anywhere… and most of those other places won’t be ruined deathtraps run by the incompetent. Thus, I want to be the first to start a campaign to have New Orleans razed to the ground. Why spend countless dollars rebuilding the city and making new, stronger levies when it can be abandoned for free?
Am I talking anything other than sense here?