Who hear misses The Limey? For those who missed that famous pen pal friendship, here’s a link to the final episode that has links to the previous episodes (they need to be read in order for full effect). I have to admit, I do scan the comments of the trolls we get today in hopes there is a Rage Against the Machine reference, but there won’t be another like The Limey. Also, I’ve came to the conclusion a while ago that stringing trolls on for public humiliation is just a little too mean for me.
Still, if you want to engage trolls, I have some advice. Now, I’m no troll expert – IMAO doesn’t get as many trolls as the serious political sites – but I think I have some experience to impart. Anyway, here’s the main rule:
NEVER TRY TO ENGAGE A TROLL DIRECTLY.
Trying to debate a troll is a big a waste of time as the troll’s postings themselves. These people are out to vent and get attention – that’s all. It doesn’t matter how dumb a pronouncement one makes – he could say 2+2=5 – they are completely immune to reason. You cannot debate a troll. You cannot educate a troll by playing on his terms. Trying to refute his points is an exercise in futility. Someone who goes around looking for sites to stir up attention is not someone in a healthy state of mind looking for an intelligent discussion. What trolling is is a verbal tantrum, and you can’t reason with a screaming child who has no reason in the first place. This brings us to our second rule.
DON’T GET ANGRY.
If you actually got angry from something a troll writes, step back. Do not respond. What is there to get angry about? It’s just a few words and the person saying them has no influence over anything. That a person is drawn to troll is funny in itself; what the person says about any particular topic is beside the point. You have to accept the troll will not understand how silly he is, and just be able to laugh at him while he flails around trying to anger you. If you don’t detach yourself and think of the troll like a rational person, you can get frustrated and angry. This gives him what he wants and lets the troll set the terms. Crazy people should not be in charge.
So what can you do? Ignoring is the highest form of dominance, but a whole post about ignoring trolls would be boring. Anyway, here is what I find you can do, but it’s for entertainment purposes only. Maybe, with practice, these skills can be used to actually train trolls away from trollery, but if you just set your goal to confuse and bewilder the troll, you’ll be less likely to get frustrated.
Anyway, remember the two rules: you’re not angry and you’re not taking the troll head on. So what are you doing? You redirect. The Dog Whisperer does this all the time with aggressive dogs. They bark and snap their teeth, and yelling back would only make it worse. Instead, he taps them in the neck with two fingers and yells, “Tsst!” The dog then calms down and looks at the Dog Whisperer with confusion. This is basically what you do with a troll. The troll is hoping you’ll come back as angry as he is head on, but instead come in calmly from the side. There are numerous ways to do this, but here’s an example from one of the first hate mails I posted publicly:
Dopegirl (laguage warning; my language standards have changed over time)
It’s not the prefect example, but I take the troll seriously and then play with what that means in a calm fashion. Now look at the response:
Dopegirl Response (language warning)
Much calmer, and that’s all I think one should hope to achieve with a troll. That’s what made the Limey special; he never got the joke and would come back just as crazy no matter what.
“There’s no Fascist McFascist!”
He still makes me smile.