Ever envy those people who just snap and kill someone? Me, killing always takes lots of planning and fretting and sleepless nights… and many times something comes up that completely distracts me and I never even get to the actual killing.
So how is your day?
I have the same problem. One of the weak links in my snap-you’re-dead chain is unreliable minions, currently two teenage sons and several apathetic cats. When I hand down a procalamation of doom on someone, say, the Fat Dixie Chick, the cats yawn and blink, and my sons whine, “i’ll do it laaaaaaater! Jeez!”
I must have these lazy minons eliminated. Maybe hired goons…
I’m kind of distracted right now. I was listening to some cool jazz and snapping my fingers as I walked down the hall. As soon as the coroner and ambulances leave, I have to hire a new office staff.
Franks over intellectualizing again. Just let your senses and instincts be your guide. The next time you run into a smelly hippie that assaults your senses, beat him senseless.
Ya know,
I really shouldn’t do these hostile jokes and paperwork for the office at the same time. I just accidentally pasted some of that crap right into the middle of a report. One of these days I’m not going to catch my mistake.
Frank, you just need to convert to Islam. All murder, all the time!
Well, since I heard Michael Moore’ is getting sued for $75 Million, I’m a bit more chipper.
Are you kidding? I am on my sixth spontanious murder! I guess it isn’t such a great idea to post that info, but if I see you, you may be the lucky #7!
I have this brand new man in my life. He is the best thing that’s happened to me for about 10 years( he’s 1 month old).
Being so very blessed helps me not to go on murderous rages. That and since I conquered the “Change” I am no longer a candidate for “Psycho War Witch from Hades with an Attitude.” At least not on a regular basis.
I can’t wait until I snap. I already have it all planned out. First, no guns.
I’m going to my friend’s house and taking his 1977 Ford van with the 460, then, I’m going to drive around the beltway making the world a better place.
Idiot in the left lane not passing? Off the road with you.
Jerk pole-positioning in tight traffic? Off the road.
Tailgaiter? Off the road.
Reading the paper or putting on make-up? Off the road.
Change lanes with no signal? Off the road.
That’s going to be one fun day and for a week at least, the beltway will be a better place to drive.