I am outraged by United Nations Relief Coordinator Jan Egeland’s statement that Gaza is a “ticking time bomb.”

Continue reading ‘Ticking Time Bomb’ »

Forget “The Juice Box”

I’m still vacationing, but a crazy troll left us an excellent playing field for Faux-Troll Patrol in this post. So, go find the added sentences (there are bunch of them, this time) and then reward yourself by buying the new IMAO shirt.
Also, an insecure Canadian (is that redundant?) spammed a bunch of our posts with the same comment, but it’s funny enough as is.
Did you know that Nintendo was made in Canada?
Anyone, it’s such a retarded way to try and anger Americans that I don’t even know where to begin to start… thus I’ll leave it to you guys since I’m on vacation.
Be honorable, ronin.

Brand new IMAO T-Shirt from ThoseShirts.com: Know Thy Enemy: Terrorists!
I know what you’re thinking: “Bah! There was already a KTE: Terrorists shirt, and I was smart enough to buy one before it went out of print.”
Fool! This list of fun facts is ALL NEW! Check it out now!

Click to see the list and buy the shirt.
You buy many shirts because the Js need money (and you need to inform whomever is behind you about terrorists)!

According to the Staw Poll results so far, Giuliani is pretty popular among IMAO readers and conservatives at large. John Hawkins has his case about Giuliani, though, and really questions whether he is electable.
I ain’t gonna say nothing against Giuliani, though, because I’m afraid he’ll beat me to death with a tire iron.

Man, I wanted SarahK to post I was captured by Mormon extremists here in Idaho and then put up a video of me converting to Mormonism at gunpoint, but I’m on vacation, so no time for sketch comedy. I do have some rants brewing, but I’ll get to them when I get back to Florida (stupid Earnesto trying to ruin our vacation).
Anyhoo, if you’re wondering what the lovely and talented SarahK and I are up to, Sarah has been blogging it (with pictures).
Be honorable, ronin.
UPDATE: BTW, the new shirt design for ThoseShirts.com has been finalized on, and will premiere soon.

When somebody in the entertainment industry says something wrong and offensive, I feel it my duty to speak out and give that person a good talking to. Recently, Comedian Conan O’Brien received complaints from a TV affiliate in Kentucky over a spoof of the TV show – Lost. In this sketch, Conan O’Brien had his plane crash and he washed up on shore.
This led to complaints from local affiliates in Kentucky, who are still covering the most recent airplane crash that left all of the passengers dead and the co-pilot in critical condition. KLEX President and General Manager Gilbert said he’ll complain to NBC, but he said an apology won’t make up for insensitivity. “They could have killed the opening and it wouldn’t have hurt the show at all,” Gilbert said.
This leads me to my complaint: Mr. Gilbert – one does not use the term Kill An Opening, especially after so many innocent people have lost their lives. I expected more from people, even if they are TV executives.
Other inappropriate expressions include:
“That joke fell flatter than Comair.”
and
“Conan’s sketch could have used another 3,000 feet of runway.”
However, we will dismiss this offensive remark since it’s so hard to keep track of all the latest tragedies. We at IMAO will petition TV stations for greater sensitivity towards Kentuckians. We will also ask them, as a courtesy to Kentuckians, to not feature any shows where young women sleep with their brothers unless it’s a necessary plot twist for Desperate Housewives.
Remember folks – Let’s try to be a bit more sensitive: Because being sensitive to the feelings of others is what IMAO is all about.

When I convert to Islam, my new Muslim name will be “Omar.” What will be your Muslim name?
UPDATE: On second thought, I want to be “Abizaid”. Abizaid kicks ass!