Losing the primary yesterday was bad, but things have gotten worse for Joe Lieberman…

“I’ve lost my MoJoe!”

IMAO scores again. I have discovered a job listing that will blow you away. If it doesn’t, you’ll LOOK blown away once we “touch up” the pictures.
**** JOB LISTING ****
Have you ever wanted to be a photographer but were afraid you’d spend your days chasing after Lindsay Lohan? Can you look at something through a viewfinder and click a button? Then do we have a job for you: Reuters Photographer. As a photographer for Reuters (Motto: It’s been 2 days since we’ve been busted with mistakes) you’ll travel the world.
Our most important demand? Objectivity. You must be as neutral as possible while documenting the latest atrocities inflicted by Israel upon an unsuspecting, innocent world.
Do you have what it takes to work for us?
Take this handy quiz and find out.
Do YOU Have What It Takes To Work For Reuters?
Employment Quiz

Continue reading ‘Job Openings at Reuters?’ »

It’s not the general election, but it’s quite a feat to defeat an incumbent in a primary. You have to give it to Kos; after seeing how good he is at making Democrats lose in the previous campaigns he worked on, this time he set out to purposely cause a Democrat to lose, and now loyal Democrat Lieberman has lost his primary because of his alleged gay tryst with President Bush (also, there was a whisper campaign about Lieberman being in fact Jewish).
So, unfortunately, today will not be “National Laugh at Kos Day.” Instead, we will just snigger at his gloating and the huge cluelessness behind it.
As for the anti-war millionaire primary winner not-Lieberman, he will now face Lieberman in the general election. If Lieberman wins, Kos will have effectively lost the Democrats one of the safest Senate seats they held. If Lamont wins, then Kos and his nutters will have spent all this time and energy just replacing one Democrat with another in an election year when Republicans were vulnerable. So, either way, the day after the general election will be “National Laugh at Kos Day.”
But, today, he stands victorious, a towering midget among gnomes.

So the tapes from the Mel Gibson incident won’t be released?

Audio and video tapes of Mel Gibson’s drunken driving arrest are exempt from the California Public Records Act and won’t be released, authorities said, despite requests from a celebrity news Web site.
The Web site, TMZ, had asked Los Angeles County Sheriff Lee Baca for tapes of the incident in which Gibson uttered obscenity-laced, anti-Semitic comments. TMZ argued the tapes should be seen and heard by the public to assess whether Gibson received preferential treatment from the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department.
“The records you have requested are records of the investigation and part of the investigatory file in this matter,” replied Gary P. Gross, principal deputy for the county counsel’s office. That means they must remain sealed, Gross said.

That’s rather sad, because I have it on good word that the tapes actually exonerate Mel Gibson.
How so?
Well, you see, the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department isn’t all that swift when it comes to writing reports and taking down statements. Add in the fact that Mel Gibson has a pretty thick Aussie accent and he was legally drunk.
Not completely drunk. Just legally.
Ever try to understand an Australian who wasn’t drunk? Might as well be from Mars for all it’ worth.
Anyway, he’s thought to have said: “F—king Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world.”
But the what he really said was: “F—king Jews are responsible for War Of The Worlds.”
You see, Mel Gibson is a huge fan of the original 1953 War Of The Worlds movie by George Pal and Cecil B. DeMille. And it broke his heart to see what Stephen Spielberg did with it in his 2005 remake.
As it did every cinema-loving American. That movie sucked.
So, who was responsible for that piece of crap? Well, it was directed by Stephen Spielberg.
Just in case you didn’t know, Stephen Spielberg is Jewish. And so is Paula Kauffman Wagner, who was the executive producer on the project.
Two Jews. Responsible for War Of The Worlds. Which had been released on DVD the week of Mel Gibson’s drunken driving incident.
Now does it make sense?
I think we all owe Mel Gibson an apology.

Continue reading ‘War Of The Mel’ »