New Report: Great Satan Not Defeated!

In a stunning setback to the Al Qaeda network, a new report by their internal departments indicate that the war against the Great Satan has only escalated.
“It was one of those Bin Laden myths that something like this would work,” said an Al Qaeda operative who insisted on being identified as Mohammed X.
This report is causing an uproar among the Al Qaeda intellectuals such as Osama Bin Laden and John F. Kerry (who served in Vietnam).
When asked for comment OBL had the following statement: “We apparently misjudged America. We figured that if we attacked them that this horrible Great Satan would somehow surrender. We are looking at our internal data reports to figure out what went wrong. By all rights, they should have thrown up their hands in surrender. At this point, we speculate that we grossly over counted the number of Democrats.”
Al Qaeda is currently analyzing all of its options including choosing easier targets such as the women, children, and the Pope. Other options available include converting Islam into a religion of peace. Unfortunately, all attempts at this have lead to violent protests.

6 Comments

  1. Islam is called the Religion of Peace because Muslims aren’t very good at making war. Which is why they’ve been getting their butts kicked for over two hundred years. They should just stick to making little Junior Jihadis, which they do very well. Demographics is their best weapon.

  2. Just to clarify not all of us (dems) are surrender monkeys or kneel to the image of the American chicken (peace sign) and some of us very big believers in the second admenment (as long as you register).

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