At what point do Republicans have to step in and stop the Democrat slap fight? You have people whose politics dictate they be meek little wusses when it comes to confrontation, and now they’re pitted against each other in a fight for their political lives? It’s like putting two kittens in a pit and trying to goad them into killing each other. Barack Obama, same as anyone with liberal beliefs like that, can’t have testes larger than sesame seeds. Hillary at least has a mean streak, but still the Democrats’ politics of surrender just don’t relate well to going for the throat.
“I’ll best ensure us defeat in Iraq!”
“I’ll get us extra defeat!”
(slap slap slap)
Neither of them is going to be able to deliver a death blow, and this is going to continue to go on until its gone from amusing to sad. To think that one of these people could be representing us on the world stage. There are people out there plotting to kill us; what are they going to think?
TERRORIST 1: Oh no! The Americans have a new president, and he is armed with both hope and change!
TERRORIST 2: Surely after he is done creating billions in new spending, he will be after us!
TERRORIST 3: We are doomed!
TERRORIST 1: Nothing will save us from his clean articulateness!
TERRORIST 2: I love muffins!
TERRORIST 3: What? Why are talking about muffins at a time like this?
TERRORIST 2: I just really like muffins and wanted to say so before it was too late. I especially like blueberry.
TERRORIST 1: Infidel!
TERRORIST 2: What? Where in the Koran does it say I can’t like muffins?
TERRORIST 1: …
TERRORIST 1: I…
TERRORIST 1: I can’t read! (sobs)
TERRORIST 3: It’s brave of you to admit that, Habib.
TERRORIST 1: (sobs)
TERRORIST 2: Illiteracy is the true terrorist.
Okay… um… I forget what I was talking about again.
I have to protest, Frank…..I really WANT to see it go from amusing to sad. Saying that they are like kittens is just inflammatory. Think of them as being more like something disgusting that you would want to pit in a death match…..like monkeys or hippies or something.
“Illiteracy is the true terrorist”
Frank, your genius is a gift to us.
The vile liberal habit* of redefinition is most annoying. “Isn’t the true racist the one who doesn’t pay his fair share of taxes?”
As if terrorists, if taught to read, would suddenly realize that those passages in the Koran telling them to kill infidels actually say to kill infidels, and so would be our friends.
I both agree and disagree with cowgirl.
Disagree: The Dhimmicrats are already sad.
Agree: Sadness among Dhimmicrats is ALWAYS amusing.
You put off a new installment of Hellbender for this 4-star filler?
Stop the slap fight? The point of Operation Chaos is to prolong the slap fight.
This post made me laugh mainly because I couldn’t help imagining what you were really thinking! Five enchiladas.
“”
Actually, you only have one reader. I just use a bunch of different IPs and comment under a bunch of different names to make you feel good about yourself, as if anybody would actually read this site! So what I guess I’m trying to say is, go ahead and put only Hellbender stuff.
Mmmm… I really do love muffins. Crap! Does this mean I agree with terrorists?!
I find that I agree with the terrorists on a number of issues to some extent. Remember, hippies are infidels too
If liking muffins is terrorism, I am a terrorist. They are that good! Hurray for posts dedicated to muffin-love!
hey frank!!–have you found a real job yet?—cuz we are rooting for yaz!
Bravo Frank. That Terrorist banter is some of your best work.
Go post that on the comments section of the HuffPo somewhere.
If Habib and pals were to find a place in “In my world”, I might be forced to buy more IMAO shirts.
(Who am I kidding, I’m moving to DC in 2 weeks and need to set the tone)
It’s like a really bad reality TV show and Americans love really bad reality TV.
Host. “Tonight on Fear Factor Survivor, it’s the Battle of the Socialists between Honkey-Hatin’ Barack NoMiddleName Obama and and Hillary “The Snipe” Clinton. You’ll see these two Tax Raisers compete in three disgusting challenges …” The challenges would include who could sit in a phone booth with a hippie the longest before they passed out, which candidate would crawl through a tunnel filled with scorpions to reach the briefcase of bribe money fastest, and watching a Michael Moore movie.
At the end of the show, Joe Rogan would award the victor the Democratic Nomination and a medal that says “Biggest Chicken Turd On the Planet”.
People would so tune in to see that. Except for the swimsuit competition.
Death by slapping can happen. Haven’t you seen Manos: Hands of Fate?
I just got a call from the Hillary campaign and I’m sorry to report that our friend Jimmy is not yet out of the woods. Although Hillary herself is not available it seems that there is a large contingent of…well…large, hairy, well muscled and fairly masculine women that seem interested in a protracted “romp” and although I protested strongly it seems that the Ford F-350 Dually is steaming your way…
#14 – Posted by: on March 27, 2008 02:48 PM
Ha! One of my favorite MST3Ks.
Barack Obama, same as anyone with liberal beliefs like that, can’t have testes larger than sesame seeds.
Frank,
It is my understanding that hilldebeast has difficulty concealing her testes, so surely they are larger than sesame seeds.
(Who am I kidding, I’m moving to DC in 2 weeks and need to set the tone)
#12 – Posted by: Ringmaster on March 27, 2008 02:21 PM
Don’t you mean set the “timer” for the detonator?
#14: “Death by slapping can happen. Haven’t you seen Manos: Hands of Fate?”
Of course, the only watchable version of that movie is the Mystery Science Theater 3K version.
I can’t handle the onslaught of women, ussjc! Tell ’em to stop in Seattle and use their cell phone to call my radio program, MSNoSex, tonight at 01:22. At least thay way, I’ll know who they are and will direct them to the proper Seattle AM station, KJIM MCDERMOTT. He NEEDS a working over.
Don’t feel bad. I suffer from ADD too. And when you seriously sit down and think about all the people affected by – LOOK A SQUIRREL!
Somehow, I find the bitter struggle between actual respectable conservatism (low taxes, low spending, staying out of foreign affairs, limited government) and your bullshit neo-con stupidity (low taxes, spending that makes democrats look frugal, invading any country that looks at us funny, bureaucracy run amok as in the Dept of Homeland Security et al) far more entertaining than Hillary and Barrack. Maybe that’s why the congress keeps slipping away one seat at a time and all the donations are drying up….
“Neither of them is going to be able to deliver a death blow, and this is going to continue to go on until its gone from amusing to sad.”
Yes but they might bruise their delicate skin with a particularly hard slap.
Chris, get out from under your wet blanket. Since when is “looking at us funny” ok? You let these countries have an inch, next thing you know, they take a mile.
By the way, that weird clicky-crackly sound that you here when you are talking to your mom?
Homeland Security. For realsies.
Chris –
We aren’t NeoCons here. And Ron Paul isn’t a true conservative, either. He’s a fruit loop wrapped in Laffy Taffy surrounded by crrrrrazy topped off with a tin foil hat.
#22 Ronulan? You are the one we have been waiting for. (Sound familiar? Gosh, there aren’t many left around here, are there?)
Jimmy, they sent a follow-up email to tell me to let you know that they like to have fun. They are BIG fans of the WNBA and the LPGA and they are going to take you along to several “events” as their “boy toy”. I think that that means something about male repression and I would be prepared for the serious end of sex-slave play as the one getting his ass literally whipped!!! These women do appear from their emails, however quite friendly and I have established a quite humorous bond if that matters! They mentioned “Strap-On’s”… Any idea what they may have in mind for my good friend?
You be having some very strange female connections, indeed, oh great master of the sternplanes. Now, the part about the WNBA I kinda like since many of those women are cute and really can kick my a$$. Although, in my hayday (Jan 3, 1943), as a basketball player for the New York Knitted Boxers, I was known to lay down some pretty heavy ball myself. They might appreciate that and recognize it immediately. I HOPE this it doesn’t interfere with my schedule (might have to CHANGE it), however, as I’ve got prospects lined up across Puget Sound (yes, they literally are coming by the boatloads) just waiting to meet the late night talkshow sexpert. Most of them, hopefully, are wearing strap-on life jackets which is probably the source of their question. They’ll need those for flotation, warmth and cushioning against the rough ride they’ll no doubt receive.
I am truely impressed by the path this thread has taken … from the Democrate candidates fighting each other to determine who gets the honor of giving the consession speech in November to Amazons with strap-ons.
The Ronulan comments are my favorite tangent.
Terrorists argueing are the funniest though.
you can’t make this stuff up …
OH LOOK ANOTHER SQUIRREL …
my mistake the Ron Paul comments were on a different thread …
imagine that another squirrel …
“Neo-con” is shorthand for “secular and/or Jewish pro-American and pro-Israel libertarian conservative”.
It wasn’t the “neo-con” idea to let loose on the growth of spending and bureaucracy. The spending came about due to crooked populists like DeLay and Cunningham. The bureaucracy was demanded by Democrats who, let’s not forget, held the Senate by one Dem-caucusing “maverick” in 2001-2 and again in 2007 on.
Chris: Go back to chanting “Perle! Feith! Wolfowitz!” at your rally and leave us the hell alone.
“Illiteracy is the true terrorist.”
Best Line Ever.