Since Barack Obama had his passport data illegally accessed, he is at risk for identity theft. If someone purchases something from you with a credit card and claims to be Barack Obama, it would be a good idea to do some extra checks on his identity by asking a few more questions to confirm he is who he says he is:
QUESTION #1: What is your middle name?
CORRECT ANSWER: “It’s racist to even bring that up.”
QUESTION #2: How would you describe your grandma?
CORRECT ANSWER: “Typical white person.”
QUESTION #3: If you found out someone is a hateful bigot, how quickly should you cut ties with him?
CORRECT ANSWER: “Within twenty years.”
QUESTION #4: I will say a series of words, and I want you to say the first thing that comes to mind with each. [Say five random words, waiting for a response for each.]
CORRECT ANSWER: He should answer “hope” or “change” no matter what the words.
Next, ask him a series of questions about foreign affairs. If he’s the real Barack Obama, he should have no idea what you’re talking about.
Also, make sure he is not wearing a flag pin, as that would immediately identify an impostor.
Slithering is also a dead giveaway for the real deal… watch for the forked tongue.
QUESTION: Do you think I am a racist?
CORRECT ANSWER: Yes, but I can no more disown you than my racist grandmother.
INCORRECT ANSWER: Nah, why would I think that, honkey crackah? Now, about your donation…
I really don’t understand what all the fuss is about. So what if someone looked up some innocuous information. If they weren’t supposed to see it, they shouldn’t have been granted access in the first place.
Also, you’ll know it’s an impostor if the guy claiming to be Obama is black.
Obama is kind of like sour half and half you buy at the store. You open it without smelling it, pour it on your cereal, taste it, and then… Gag.
Somehow, it’s been discovered that Keith Olbermann is going into full-on BDS mode, frothing at the mouth about who knew what and when did they know it. Pejman at Redstate.com is saying so, anyway.
He seems unaware or untroubled that McCain’s records were also accessed.
Weak.
I’m John McCain and I’ve just about had it with this blog! I have issued marching orders to my campaign that there will be no personal attacks against my close personal friends on the other side of the isle whom I have worked closely with on behalf of the American people (after I served in Vietnam and spent years as a POW, by the way) and you pricks on IMAO keep not following my orders and I’m getting really really mad! You just wait until I own the IRS, FBI and CIA! I will have each agency crawling up each one of your asses for the next 4 years. I will put my VP, Hillary Clinton…err…shhhh…don’t tell anyone about that ok!!!
The correct answer to #3 is, “It depends. If the bigot is white, he must be fired immediately. If he is black, then you keep him around until enough of the public finds out what a moron he is that you have no choice but to pretend you don’t know how bad of a bigot he is.”