It’s time to recognize IMAO commenter Jimmy. His comments help me know my craft is appreciated and motivates me to continue writing. Also, his comments means there is more material to read even when Harvey or I haven’t posted. Jimmy is an important part of IMAO, and it’s high time we all recognize that. So why don’t you comment here on how much you like Jimmy and in the future learn from Jimmy’s examples and be a good IMAO commenter (though probably not as good as Jimmy). Without commenters like Jimmy, there would be no IMAO.
And with no IMAO, there is only death to look forward to.
JImmy isn’t very honest but when he’s sober he’s a damn good commenter! I do question his “taste” in women having exposed a huge crush on the one with thunderous thighs. I think it’s a mommy issue or something. Congrats, Jimmy!
I thought you had a day job, Frank.
Well, at least ALL the freaky people aren’t enamored with me. Jimmy’s clearly got his share, as well.
How do we now “Jimmy” isn’t just another persona of that Frank/Harvey person?
Really, hats off to IMAO, Frank and Harvey! I’ve never had 8 tabs open here before! I guess politics and a lazy August (for me) are recipes for laughter.
Very few other blogs make me laugh. And compared to veteran commenters here, I’m a novice. But thanks for the compliment, Frank.
Now get back to writing. After all, the Republican National Convention is coming up!
Sorry Frank, you can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you need. Just standing in line……….
Mick, you wanker, get off of Jimmys cloud.
Whenever I read a comment from Jimmy, a little thrill runs up my leg. Or maybe that’s the dog wanting to be let out, I’m not sure. But I do feel something down there, let me be clear on that.
It’s about time you let the Greek out here.
I don’t read comments. I don’t even read your posts Frank. I just come to IMAO because I like the red color.
Who’s Jimmy? Isn’t he the guy that mows my lawn?
All hail Jimmy! Move over Obama, Jimmy is The One.
Jimmy just ordered his wife to build him a Greek “temple” out in his back yard. To this Jimmy’s wife said something to the effect of “F…You, you prick” “what do you think you are the second coming…yea…like you could think about a first coming if you know what I’m talking about”…and then she promptly kicked Jimmy in the stones…
Wasn’t “Jimmy” Clark Kent’s gay butt boy in all the comics?
Sorry…this is Jimmy on South Park…I should NOT be making fun! My Bad!
And taxes. Death and taxes.
And more, if the Dems have their way with us next January.
We are Barack Great and Glorious Leader (May He Live Forever) and John McAmnesty and we both want to congratulate our good close personal friend that prick “Jimmy” whom we have NOT reached across the aisle to “get work done on behalf of the American People” and we have both issue our congratulations! Enjoy your freedom, Jimmy as it is about to come to an end you anti-American scum! We have you on our watch list as someone who will not submit to the “collective” of Obama-McAmnesy and we shall hunt your ass down and…well…when we are done…you will wish to live in SF…
Jimmy gonna sick his chopper pilot to drop a whole lotta Hellfire whupass on ussjimmycarter. He’s not all that far from the great, giant-horned Mosquito state and that crazy town of Minneapoloosa where they nominate gray-haired, long-horned Repubicans.
Recently unconfirmed rumors have started circulating around the Obama campaign that there might be a “male friend” to the Illinois Senator… When confronted with this “rumor” the Obama campaign, commented that “Jimmy is just a towel boy to the Senator” and the whole thing has been a huge…well…whoops!”
I’m Hillary Clinton, and as my first comment on this blog (looks like a “blah-g” to me!), I’d just like to thank that ussjimmycarter for all his warm support and encouragement during my campaign. Without his little nudges (oooh!) and friendly pokes (aaah!) about my cackling and beautiful posterior (let alone their proportions), I just could have made it as far as I did. Hey, ussjc, I got a special warm spot for you, sweetie!!
Having been “turned” Jimmy was bent over the table, pants around ankles in anticipation (of James Carville and Keith Olberman), and then She walked in the door and slapped the shit him…hard and dirty…the way that Jimmy liked it! Only Hillary could turn him on like this! “Pull your damn pants up you weenie” she howled! Jimmy pulled his pants up in a slow, but sexy and “you know you like it this way you biatch” way”…. Jimmy found himself if the middle of a problem…he loved Hillary with a love that burned like a hot rod that just wasted a group of stiffs, but…but…she was…married…what to do?
Just then, Baracko Bang-Bang Obama walked in and performed a grand Hillary-Interruptus. “You’ve gone too far here, Senator!” he scolded her. “If there’s anything I can’t stand it’s a typical white woman picking on some poor engineer from the great State of Washington, our 57th state? Come with me. The bus with your name on it is outside.” With her head down, Hillary took her place under the bus. “I knew I liked that ussjimmycarter guy better” she muttered in her orange suit.
“Fools” cackled Hillary! “This nomination is MINE, MINE, MINE, MIN…slap…just then Jimmy walked in and slapped Hillary to her “senses”… Jimmy then asked “Hillary my most high and glorious leader the best looking woman ever, how may I serve you today”… to which Hillary let out the most hideous cackle ever heard in the history of man… “Muwhahahahahahah” “You are such feeble, humans with tiny penises and you bore me”… “Muwhahahahahah”… Major butt kissers like our friend Jimmy are left “hanging on” to whatever is left of the world after this evil shrew exerts her will on America! “The nation wonders…”If only Jimmy had done his duty as a man…”
As Hillary stared at Jimmy the “bulge” in his pants continued to “grow”… Jimmy thought about this and as Hillary tore at his “rod”, Jimmy said “No” “What will MSNBC say” MSNBC issued a statement today that Keith Olberman has fired Jimmy on the basis of his relationship with Barack Olbama! It’s been reported that Barack is a superior lover and that Jimmy is “sub-standard ” and therefore has been dismissed. Jimmy issued a statement today that he “loves Obama with a love that sur…” the statement was cut-off… MSNBC promises to keep you up-to-date on this story…comrades…
After that last group of exchanges, I just want to stay far away from both of you.
Jeepers it’s taken a long time for SuperFrankj to say something nice, Jimmy!
*** FLASH ***
AP – 08-27-2008 – Denver: A blogger with the handle “ussjimmycarter” was caught red-handed and red-faced today at Invesco Field right during preparations for Barack Obama’s Thursday night speech. “We found him pimping hot dogs,” said Noah Mustardo, chief of United Press International’s field team. “But his shirt was caught on the BBQ handle and he was yelling ‘Get it off me!’ meaning, the fire, apparently.” Police quickly arrived on the scene finding the man’s pockets and shirt stuffed with flaming, oversized wieners, including several in his mouth. They quickly extinguished the flames. “The man wasn’t coherent,” continued Noah. Something about the wrong mustard and heads being ripped off and stuffed in the wrong place.”
Jimmy, your comments are all that keep me alive after seeing Harvey’s last post. Keep it up.
This might be a little of-topic, but:
FINALLY! A place where noone hates America! Thank you,
GodIMAO!Hmmm…
Question: How do the codes work here ? :S
#30 – use “>” brackets instead of “]”
Jimmy, ussjc – roflmbo
Ok, I watched Bubba.
Actually, mykidsmommy, we could put ussjimmycarter up against Slick Willy in a debate and ussjc would rip-off Willy’s head and shove it up his ass (in more ways than one).
Sounds like Clinton bought-in – and added to – the media fantasy story about Obama. But then, he never passes up an occasion to make himself look better than he is (trash lying around).
So do we get a Ronin Profile of Jimmy?
Congrats Jimmy! First South Park, now IMAO. Which is the most thrilling and/or personally satisfying?
It’s funny reading Ace’s live blog but hoping people are still here.
No, roamingfirehydrant, Frank quit those last year.
I’m watching Stinky Shorts Biden now, Gbear, I can’t comment any more – as my popcorn just fell off the table. And I’ve got a fire in the TV…
I want to show my appreciation of jimmy’s comments also, and believe me, I don’t say what I don’t mean, plus I have a little crush on you, because of your — it’s hard thinking with that boring pot of shlub mouthing his teeth, I’ve bin Bidin my Timex, but I see you are married, oh well…
Nope, not married any more, island girl. Free range chicken.
Isn’t Biden just awful? He makes Slick Willy look good.
“Wow… what a great audience. Boy, B-B-Bill Clinton sure talked about oil tonight… that must be why they call him Slick whuh-whuh-wheahhh… wheahhh… W-Willy. Thanks, you’re a terrific audience… very much.”
C’mon Jimmy, I was waiting for you to do it, but I gotta go to bed soon!
HAHA! Jinx!
well that’s good news Jimmy. I see bomb in bin laddin couldn’t take being a hadin so he grabbed that spotlight
Well, I was waitin’ for you RedWhiteAndTrue.
Hey!
Does anyone have a puke mop? Mine is full now and I need to finish cleaning up from those speeches.
They were the biggest evasion of reality in the history of American politics, in my arrogant opinion.
(After tonight, I lose my high status here so you all will have to put up with me until (a.) I retire for the evening; (b.) Drink too much beer; (c.) Puke-up my gall bladder; (d.) All of the above. No, actually, I’m totally sober here.)
Whew…that was some fast banter…..these exchanges is why I come here… And Jimmy and USSJC: not the same person? Frank and Harvey: not the same? Michelle and Barack, Hillary and Bill: I think are the same only 5 shades and 20 years.
I’m sorry I’m late Jimmy boyo. You know you are my very favorite poster here at IMAO. Frank couldn’t say nicer things about you.
If it wasn’t for you and your encouragement I would have bagged this whole political satire business after the Mitt/ Mormon debacle back in the spring. YOU are the reason I came back and one of the reasons I stay around.
God bless you, you darling man.
PammyV: I come here because I like to laugh every day and know I’m in good company and really enjoy the comments from everyone. I simply don’t have as many friends in real life who think like I do as I can count here (and write like Frank and Harvey and everyone else, like ussjc – yeah, he IS separate, but we’re close in age). The internet really is an amazing place.
IMAO is a too-well-kept secret, IMO.
Oh, and seanmahair. You are the sanest person here, you you you seanmahair.
August 27th – Jimmy Day!
Congrats!
On the subject of Biden’s speech, this was my favorite excerpt:
“Four score and seven years ago, I had a dream that the only thing we had to fear was fear itself; it was the best of times, it was the worst of times.
These are the times that try men’s souls and I haven’t yet begun to fight!”
Such inspirational words.
…..who’s Jimmy? 😉
He’s under you, Bob in Feenicks. (oh no)
Thanks for everyone’s kind words. I had no idea this post by Frank was going to happen (neither did he, I’ll wager). As this day unfolded, I found myself unable to work as I had more tabs open in Firefox than ever before and pushed my one Meg of RAM to the limit, I think. But laughing sure feels good at the end of the day.
Now, personally, I’d also love to read some people who haven’t commented here in a long while. Like Desert Elephant, Wolf, AlanABQ. And Socrates, I don’t think you realize just how much we enjoy reading your stuff. You need to write here more often, too. For those that we haven’t seen much of lately, I hope you are well.
In my many years, I have never been more concerned about the future of our Republic. We laugh, we joke… but on the inside, we boil. Without the laughter, Frank and Harvey, we might just boil over. Thanks for making this here blog the best sanctuary on the Internet! ~Jimmy
I like you too Jimmy, even if I do envy you ability to always make your comments witty, and/or understandable.
Gracious words, Jimmy.
Is this the same Jimmy that punched Kramer out on ‘Seinfeld’?
Get Reddy Jimmy. If you don’t go into shock from throwing up, you’ll be laughing too hard from Obama trying to make sence of his platform.
Sure I’d by this crap if my history knowledge was that of a 4th grader.
Yes, I’ve always been fond Jammies–especially the kind with the footies so I don’t have to put my shoes on to walk the dog at night.
What? Jimmy? Oh, of course. Jimmies are good too, but only on chocolate frosted donuts.
AAAhhhh-JIMMEH!!!
Enjoy your fifteen minutes, brah. You’re doing yeoman’s work.
More Jimmy related quotes:
“She’s got the Jimmy legs.”
“Jimmy’s down!”
“Those aren’t pillows!”
BigRichardSmall – I figure that I’m just gonna pass out from a combination of laughing too hard while crying and swearing at the same time. It’s a terrible combination.
PaleoMedic: Did you ever have that drink when you got home?
God, you people make me laugh. Who ARE all of you?
Well, I’m sure you weren’t talking to me but I’ll answer anyway. : )
I live in WA, home of cheating liberal governor Christine Gregoire and the moonbats who protest the war by using their children as human shields in block the way of moving tanks.
I’m one of the only conservatives I know who live in this God-forsaken county.
I’m orignally from OK (Go Sooners!) but came up here to be near MIL when FIL went to Iraq.
Me? Drink? Been on the wagon for four, no, five days now. But it is almost Friday, so I expect this sobriety thing will lapse for a couple of days.
It’s a disease, you know.
Way to go Jimmy! Yay Jimmy!
RightWingTink – are you running a Tink Tank? It would be a good ting to. Go Rossi!! Gov. Christine Gregoire is the northwest Obama Girl.
It sounds like PeleoMedic was off the wagon before he was on it! Hey, wait a minute. I’m out of the good stuff. Damn.
John WHO? McCain?? Yay John! If you lose, we’re screwed.
Congradulations. Now get a life.
George, I have a coffee mug that says:
“Genuine Antique Person:
Been There, Done That, Can’t Remember”
And to AlanABQ, besides asking “Where you been?” I’ve just got this to say:
RON PAUL RON PAUL RON PAUL RON PAUL RON PAUL?
Hey yeah, Frank, whatever happened to Ronin Profiles? Getting my own Ronin Profile was one of the greatest events of my life! …or at least of that week. I still have the “I am Ronin” logo up on my blog. We need more Ronin Profiles!!!
Oh yeah, and YAAAYYY for Jimmy.
How do YOU know about Rossi? Are you spying on us?
Rossi’s running again. Maybe this time when he wins again he’ll actually get into office rather than having to give in to some whiny monkey-faced liberal who, on the second recount, manages to come up with 1,000 votes that weren’t there previously. But I digress.
We were talking about Jimmy.
Makes Jimmy a democrat
Whoa there Freedom Fries. You need to use bold letters if you’re gonna say that and mean it! I’ll have to call out the Minnesota Secretary of No Buggerin’ (ussjc) and get him in here for another round.
Also, I’m confused now, Tink. I’m in the south-central Sound, Tink. Relatively close to that bastion-town, Olympiass (you know, the one that, if it went away, everyone in Eastern WA would cheer?). So, I know about Rossi. Actually, I have a sister who KNOWS Christiniwienie G. But that’s a whole ‘nother story.
I don’t know how to use codes 🙁
One of the frustrating things about instructing people about HTML, Freedom, is that you can’t use an HTML “control” (like this text box we type into that then displays on the site) to show the control characters required.
The less-than and greater-than sign keys are the “brackets.” To start a bold, enclose the letter b in brackets. Type the word or phrase and end it with /b in brackets.
Then get “HTML For Dummies” for the rest of the codes. Or use Google.
What kind of brackets? Round brackets, square brackets, curly brackets, or angle brackets?
🙂
Well boyo, you’ve certainly come up in the world. Couldn’t happen to a nicer, more gracious, generous and erudite fellow.
However you and ussjimmy are beginning to sound like on old married couple. (hehehehehehe)
Maybe ussjc and I are distant brotherly sparring partners, seanmahair, who just enjoy ribbing each other. (How can I say that without using loaded words??)
Actually, seanmahair, I’ve more-or-less been on vacation this whole month. And with the conventions and all the politics and stuff, I’ve been spending a lot of time on the web. I was willing to not comment anymore today here, but, this is soooo strange: people won’t let it drop!
Ok, there. Now it’ll drop. It’s dead, Jim. “The man’s not only dead, his brain is gone!”
#70 – angle brackets, like this “>”
I see…
Btw, looky what I found:
Anti-Bush Bumper Stickers
anti-Bush anti-War pro-Democracy pro-America pro-Freedom Stickers!
http://www.antibushbumperstickers.com
I forgot to add this:
Kinda contradicts itself, doesn’t it? 😉
Congrats Jimmy.
I concur that a Ronin Profile is in order (unless of course it would violate national security).
Jimmy, and JimmyUSSCarter and Frank and Harvey and everyone else here, it is astounding to me that BarktheRack is seamlessly weaving lies, dreams, and figure 8’s up the yin yang, and these mindless, foolish robotic well meaning people are cheering his scamming butt with breathless screaming. Here in NYC I bump into so many nonsensical examples of this. I am aghast at the number of people that are this dense. PLEASE click my name and learn about this sheister.
Jimmy~ I’m in Tacoma, Lakewood to be specific. Been to Olympiyuck many times. I think I’d rather be there than seattle, though.
Your sis knows Gag-oire? How long was in the hospital after meeting her?
I’m supposed to be dead already. But thanks Rightjabs. And island girl, just remember, roughly half of all people have a below average IQ. Joe Biden knows this well; It’s why he’s there. And RightWingTink, my sister is hopelessly in the GagWire camp. She doesn’t like Obama, however. Ok, I’m going back to the grave now.
“May you be in heaven an hour before the devil even knows you’re dead”- Old Irish Blessing.
Seemed appropriate.
Yeah, I’m always early. But I’ll take it with me, seanmahair. Maybe it get me a reserved seat.
The Devil decides who goes to hell and who doesn’t?
:O
No, but I Am the Accuser.
It’s kind of like traffic court. If the officer who wrote your ticket doesn’t appear in court, you stand a better chance of getting out of paying your fine. Do you have any idea how much it costs to keep all those fires burning? And unlike Planned Parenthood, I don’t get any government subsidies! It’s hard being an independent businessman these days!
Sympathy for the Devil, anyone?
Is this some kind of test here? ‘Cause I got news for The Devil: I make you nervous!
Not a bad line, if I don’t say so myself.
Could Jimmy be the Devil in disguise?
No, but I am afraid that if Heaven won’t have him, then he’ll try to take over down here! I’ll have no other options but to go back to my old job, cleaning spittoons in the pubs at Fiddlers Green!
“Now Fiddlers Green is a place I’ve heard tell
Where old sailors go when they don’t go to hell.
Where the skies always fair and the dolphins do play,
And the cold coasts of Greenland are far, far away.
Wrap me up in me oilskins and jumper!
No more on the docks I’ll be seen!
Tell me old shipmates
I’m taking a trip, mates
And I’ll see you someday on Fiddlers Green!”
How can Heaven not have him? I mean, just take a look at his cute little face…he’s adorable.
I like that, Da Debil. Thank you. I do plan on taking a “last sail” some day and perhaps I will happen on Fiddlers Green. Meet me there, matie.
Neither Out Far Nor In Deep
The people along the sand
All turn and look one way.
They turn their back on the land.
They look at the sea all day.
As long as it takes to pass
A ship keeps raising its hull;
The wetter ground like glass
Reflects a standing gull
The land may vary more;
But wherever the truth may be–
The water comes ashore,
And the people look at the sea.
They cannot look out far.
They cannot look in deep.
Btu when was that ever a bar
To any watch they keep?
Robert Frost
“But” was mispelt.
Sounds good!
“When you come to the dock and your long trip is through,
There’s pubs and there’s clubs and there’s lassies there too.
Where the girls are all pretty and the beer is all free,
And there’s bottles of rum growing on every tree.”
(There’s more verses to the song but you get the idea!)
Robert Frost is cool, Let’s invite him too!
Heck! Hey everybody! We’re all meeting at Fiddlers Green in the sweet by-and-by! See ya there! (No trolls).
Can I invite Obama?
Oh and Hilary, too!
“The morbid, the merrier! Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk!”
Curley Howard