“On today’s agenda,” Dick Cheney announced at the meeting of Big Oil, “Evil!”
“We should raise prices again!” Skeletor suggested.
“Excellent!” Cheney said. “Anymore ideas for evil?”
“We should propose drilling in more national parks,” Black Manta stated. “How about Disney World?”
“Great idea,” Cheney said. “But there is still the problem of Barack Obama. Let’s face it: We’re no match for his hope and change.”
“I can handle him,” Lex Luthor remarked. He held up a strange looking device. “This is my new shrink ray I’ve perfected. With it we can shrink Barack Obama down to miniature size.”
Cheney touch his fingertips together and smiled with glee. “And then we can place him in our pocket!”
“Robble robble robble!” the Hamburglar agreed.
“Muh ha ha ha!”
Obama played with toy trucks in a sandbox. “I’m going to be a fireman when I grow up!” he exclaimed.
Cheney wearing a mustache disguise approached Obama. He held out a wad of bills. “I have a campaign contribution for you if you come with me.”
“Ooh!” Obama exclaimed. He reached for the bills, but then he took a long look at Cheney. “Something seems to be suspicious about you.”
“I also have a lollipop for you.” Cheney held up a Tootsie Roll.
“Yay!” Obama ran to follow Cheney.
“So, in conclusion, real hope and change means letting the oil companies drill wherever they want and randomly raise prices for no reason,” Obama told the press. “Also, we should destroy all alternative energy cars with hammers and fire. This is what I support, and what I’ve always supported.”
“Should we conclude anything by the fact that you’re giving this speech from Dick Cheney’s front pocket?” a reporter asked.
“You’re a racist!” Obama responded.
“Robble robble robble!” the Hamburglar agreed.
Am I mistaken, or is there a Ron Paul reference in this post? Great stuff Harvey, keep it up.
These are my favorite part of IMAO. Oh how I’ve missed them.
Brilliant. Keep ’em coming!
Long live the Hamburglar! Robble! Robble!
Your world must be an interesting place.
Good one Frank, but seems like it’s missing something; maybe a good mauling or strangling… used to be if a IMW was coming, you could count on Rumsfeld strangling someone…
sigh.
I miss the strangling…
Mr. PotatoHead is Barack Obamas love child.
hey, I’m new to your site and none of the images seem to be showing up. Is this a regular problem with firefox?
Love the content though.
I would never play with toy trucks in My sandbox. Only racist redneck crackers play with trucks. I only play with toy Mercedes sedans with spinning rims and pink ground effect lighting.
I am happy to read an IMW!! These were always my favorite back in 2004 when we were getting ready for the election. I also miss Rumsfeld is there a way to bring him back??
Condi Rice announced today that America would be safe with Obama. Yeah, honey, in Cheney’s pocket.
I use to post here but was then banned for some reason and therefore do not now…
[Strangely enough, Harvey found himself banned the other day. The comment spam filter might be on the fritz. -Ed.]
Hey, ussjimmycarter!! Come on back, guy. Write to the blog owner and get unbanned. We need some of your good, old-fashioned head rippin’ and stuffin’ around here. BTW, both McCain and Obama called and left messages for you. They sounded confused. It’ll take a while to relay them all, you know.
The Tootsie Roll that Cheney offered Barry proably tasted a little better than the ones he’d been finding and eating in the sandbox. Not as chewy either.
You will vote for Jane Goodall for President. Forget all this Obama/McCain hype. Only Goodall will advance simian rights.
That story sounds suspiciously similar to cheese-flavored Hot Pockets…