The whole stunt the House Republicans pulled Friday to keep debating drilling after the Democrats left for vacation actually reminded me of why I ever liked Republicans in the first place. I even heard that, after the lights were turned out, Shadegg actually hacked the system to get the microphones back on for a brief bit.
The Democrats were furious. When Pelosi was asked about it, she reportedly turned to the camera, shook her fist, and screamed, “Republicans!”
Michelle Malkin has some ideas of what the Republicans can do as follow up, but here is my idea: A huge heist caper ala Ocean’s Eleven. The House Republican can combine their individual skills to break into the IRS building and stealing all the tax money from its vaults to give back to the taxpayers. It will be hilarious! The Democrats won’t know about it, and when Pelosi has a big ceremony to open the IRS vault to give billions in tax money for abortions for the gay community, she’ll find it empty! She’ll probably turn to the camera, shake her fist, and scream, “Republicans!”
Another idea is for the Republicans to rig the House voting system so it registers a “Yes” vote as a “No” and vice versa. Then the Republicans can introduce a really unpopular bill and get the Democrats to pass it. Can you imagine Pelosi’s face when she sees the voting result on drilling for oil in the heads of baby polar bears and find, on a party line vote, it was overwhelmingly passed by the Democrats. She’ll probably turn to camera, shake her fist, and scream, “Republicans!”
So what do you think the House Republicans should do to help get their mojo back?
I would love to see them build an oil rig inside the Capitol. Black gold!
Hire a celebrity impersonator of Pelosi and have her dress up as Marie Antonette and have her call the House to Order.
Then she can reenact the “let them eat solar” routine for CSPAN and youtube…
“But Madame Speaker, the people need gas..”
“Let them run solar…”
This could be fun, and very good media coverage!
Uh, Frank, your link to the drilling in polar bears is misconstrued as an e-mail address. Fix please.
Republicans could get their mojo back by reading new installments of Hell Bender.
Could pour water on Pelosi, she’d scream “Republicans!” while she was melting.
Republicans could get their mojo back by dropping a Hiroshima/Nagasaki-type Enforcer onto the Middle East and “liberating” the oil from that new parking lot into American hands.
I still wanna do that as my last official act in Office.
Sacrifice some donkeys on a makeshift altar in the House while chanting anti-Pelosi phrases in a sing-song manner?
Olivespeak
Um… They ever HAD any mojo?
Anyway, I’ve been thinking about it. The GOP in Congress want SanFran Nan and the filthy dems to come back, right? To reconvene Congress to “do something” about oil?
Do we REALLY want Congress to “do something” about oil? CONGRESS IS WHY WE’RE IN THIS FIX IN THE FIRST PLACE. The last thing we need is for that gang of thieves, idiots, and wardheelers to further meddle in our energy policy. It’s akin to asking the mafia to ensure fair and open elections for the Teamsters.
If the Republicans want to get their rumored mojo back, they simply need to take the money they’ve been spending to try to convince us that The Annointed One is a pampered idiot and run lots of commercials showing SanFran Nan on her jetsetting book tour:
“We want to drill for oil in America to ease the cost of energy. All Nancy Pelosi and the democrats want to do is burn oil so they can take vacations and go on book tours.
“Think about this when you vote in November.”
Republicans always perform ahem better when they are in the minority. Let’s keep it that way.
They’ve been miserable as majority leaders; they adapted to the prestige of power way too quickly and entirely. They helped give away our prosperity in the form of electoral largesse and bankrupted our future by dragging their feet on important issues like energy and maritime law, sovereignty of the individual, and in case anyone’s forgetten Kelso…
#2: Why even bother with an impersonator? Give someone a cheap plastic halloween mask and you wouldn’t be able to tell the difference.
When I see Republicans in Congress beheading Democrats and/or driving stakes through their terrorist lovin’ hearts, or at least introducing legislation declaring May 10th Democrats Are Total Douchebags Day, THEN I’ll believe they’ve got some mojo. Debating in the dark while no one pays attention, isn’t that what Congress does normally? Bah!
Pelosi could counterattack with the O.J. Tactic used in Las Vegas.
Recruit some thugs, or DNC staffers, and burst in screaming ‘the Capitol belongs to me.’
Hell, she could probably rout the entire GOP House by herself. Just by shouting ‘boo’.
I suggest that Congress pass the “one gun a month” law and then add that as an entitlement. Every person in the U.S. gets ONE GUN A MONTH, FREE! That would perk up the economy!
Make bumper stickers that show up all over the country depicting a drill through Pelosi’s head with the word “Drill” under it.
I try to be optomistic, I really do, that’s what Reagan taught us optimism! the can do spirit, get off your ass and do something about it! I have to admit I get really demorilized when one political hack from San Francisco can shut down the elected part of our government AND GET AWAY WITH IT!!!
I say the B@T&H can’t get away with it, not for long, congress has a lower approval rating than Bush does! Bush isn’t running for re-election the House of Representatives is! Pass the word to your friends (as if you’ll be telling them something thay don’t know already) throw the Dem bums out. Here’s a selling point; given what the Dems have done while in control of congress i.e. doubling the pump price of gasoline, and nothing else with the single exception of raising the minimum wage for high school students which means last years high school gradutes got fired to hire lower wage workers that hadn’t graduated yet or even cheaper illegal aliens.
OK my finger tips are getting sore … where’s Gingrich when you need him, I still think the only reason he didn’t enter the race was Fred Thompson got in … and even Newt didn’t want to take on Fred!
Until then, I’m registered as Independent.
Let’s abandon the Republican party and start a new party comprised of serial practical jokers. I mean devastatingly sick pranksters. They could superglue so many lib toilet seats, perform unnecessary surgery, use decayed lib corpses hooked up with animatronics. Hey, stop me if I’m wrong here.
Bush isn’t running for re-election the House of Representatives is!
#15 – Posted by: Wild Bill Kelsoe on August 4, 2008 10:22 PM
Therein lies the problem. All they really do is run for re-election. Let’s drop some term limits on them like in the Articles of Confederation. Or, maybe We the People convene a new Constitutional Convention and spell out the limitations on the Federal government so clearly that even Dems, big government apologists, socialists, etc. can understand them.
I might even vote for that kind of mojo.
THAT’S mojo, #19.
Change the locks and the phone numbers for every congressman who left Washington.
Better yet, leave them unlocked and let the homeless denizens of DC claim squatters rights in their absence.
Heck, swear in the homeless as temporary substitutes and call the House to order!
Honestly crazy people in charge of making our laws would be a refreshing change from the crazy but too arrogant to admit it bunch we’re laboring under now!
Lol. That’s all I can say – Lol.
The Democrat’s motto and emblem for drilling for more oil is a drilling rig with a giant condom over it. Theme is safe drilling for the 21st. Century.
A cowboy sees a fancy car approach. It’s a shiny now BMW. A guy steps out wearing an Armoni suit, patent leather shoes, a silk tie and gold cuff-links. The guy says, “Hey! If I can tell you exactly how many cattle are in this field, can I have one of the calves?” The cowboy says, “OK.”
The guy accesses his GPS through his I-phone, feeds his exact coordinates into his laptop, gets a NASA satelite scan of the field, punches some numbers into a spread-sheet and prints out a 150 page report on his laser printer and says, “There are exactly 1,053 animals in this field!”. The cowboy says, “that’s right.”
The guy walks into the field, grabs one of the animals and puts it in his trunk. The cowboy says, “Wait! If I can tell you what you do for a living, can I have that animal back?”. The guy says, “OK.”. The cowboy says, “You’re a U.S. Congressman.”. The guy says, “That’s right. How did you know?”
The cowboys says, “Well…,
1. You expect to get paid for answering a question I didn’t ask and which I already knew the answer to.
2. You went to great expense to prove you know my business better than I do.
3. These aren’t cows, they’re sheep; and I want my dog back!”