Basil of Basil’s Blog has made a theme for me, so hopefully I’ll be ready to make the blog move to WordPress this weekend. It’s still crashing and not allowing comments a couple times a day… plus comments have always been a bit wonky. Sometime, I really vulgar troll gets his comment moved to junk but it’s still published on the site — just I don’t get the comment e-mailed to me and only see everyone reacting to it. Recently, I saw a whole bunch of people got their e-mail junked by using the word “whore” (responding to a troll who used the word who apparently did get his comment published), and some might have even got automatically banned… though I have no idea how to check. It’s very annoying. Harvey got banned a little while ago and I could never find out why and had to manually add his IP to a safe list.
Anyway, good times ahead when I move. Hopefully I can even get the site to load faster.

Palin’s e-mail getting hacked is the perfect opportunity for McCain to seize control of an issue that affects all Americans. Obviously, current law has not been effective with the internet considering the amount of hackers and spammers and spyware. With the anonymity people get on the internet, they think they can do anything, and prosecuting a person or two every so often is just not slowing them down. It’s time for new tactics. It’s time to enter the twenty-first century. It’s time for a secret police that is above the law and answers to no one.
McCain’s first act of president should be to sign a bill to create the Internet Secret Police — or ISP for short unless that acronym is already used on the internet. “After signing this bill,” McCain will announce, “I will have no more control over these people. They are above the law, can use whatever tactics they want, and cannot be stopped. God help you weirdos on the internet.”
When they find who broke into Palin’s e-mail account, the ISP will burn down their houses and connect the hackers tiny gonads to car batteries — and they will post video of it all on YouTube. Inevitably, there will be an outcry, to which McCain can reply, “Hey, there’s nothing I can do about it. It’s not out of my hands.”
“But won’t they go crazy with their power and commit even more horrific acts?” some will ask.
To which McCain will smile and say, “Inevitably.”
Everyone will then get a final e-mail from spammers with pictures of them being flayed alive. Whole villages in Nigeria will be razed to the ground. People online will fear uttering l33t speak like wizards fear saying the name Voldemort.
When spam is destroyed and hackers are reduced to curling up in the corner of their parents’ basements with fear, who will the ISP target next? Anonymous trolls, maybe? You may think it will be horrific what will happen to them and a violation of human rights and basic human decency, but you have to admit it will help the economy to be rid of a few more useless people.
So this should be what McCain will promise: A reduction of spam, a reduction of cyber-attacks, and a reduction of annoying little goober kids. We will have a new, cleaner, more efficient internet, and that’s hope and change we can all believe in. As for anonymity on the internet, that’s still fine. Just don’t use it to annoy anyone, because then you die.

I remember when the first Knight Rider came out–back in the day, Dukes of Hazzard ruled the redneck roost. Can you imagine if people came to school today with the General Lee with the Confederate flag on it? All hell would surely break loose. Anyway, before it came out, they had this marketing campaign comparing the capabilities of the General Lee to KITT, and they showed this scene where they throw a brick at KITT. The next day, this idiot kid (easily the stupidest kid in my class, and probably in the running for stupidest kid in school), came up to me and said “Did you see the new KITT car? ::yokle chuckle:: They threw a brick at the windshield at it and it BOUNCED OFF!” This was the same kid, who in third grade, when asked what “extinct” meant, said “smelly?”. Not surprisingly, the poor guy got killed in an accident when he got sucked into some industrial machinery a couple years back. They never put “Most likely to die in an occupational accident” in yearbooks, but if they did, it would most definitely have been bestowed upon this guy. Ah, good times.

If you look at the poll averages, Obama is back ahead. The trolls were right: Palin has a liability for the ticket. McCain was a fool to ever nominate her. Now the Democrats are going to win because we had too much hubris to listen the trolls who visit here. Just think of their little troll laughter when Obama wins and how much we will deserve their mockery.
I guess the conservative movement will have to wait until 2012, but I think it’s too optimistic to believe we’ll have things together by then. 2016 is more likely… if America is still around in any form we still recognize. Me, I’m going to look for material to make my floating platform out in the sea that I shall name Frank J-istan. The military force of one shotgun should be enough to keep hippies off of it at least.