NASA & the incoming Obama team are having a tiff about cutting funds for Project Constellation – the effort to return astronauts to the moon by 2020. I speculate thusly about what else may be on the chopping block:

NASA’s new production facility brings much-needed jobs to Alabama

* Project Gore – Searching for conclusive proof that the global warming on Mars is man-made.

* Project Foxworthy – getting rednecks drunk and luring them out into the woods for a good probin’.

* Project Blagojevich – Selling that valuable @#$%ing NASA directorship to the highest bidder.

* Project Lewinsky – investigating whether NASA could actually operate at a profit if it started making & selling zero-G pr0n.

* Project Big 3 – loaning $15 billion to any car company that agrees to start producing hybrid space shuttles.

* Project Gitmo – placing terrorists in the ultimate secure holding facility: the inescapable gravitation of the sun’s surface.

* Project NotBush – using mind-control space lasers to brainwash people into voting for McCain. Probably SHOULD ax it, since it only worked for the first six months of 2008, anyway.

* Project Marlboro – retrofitting a space shuttle with a smoking section so that Obama can be the first President in space.

* Project Klaatu – searching for extraterrestrial life forms primitive enough to consider Keanu Reeves to have acting skills. Probably something in the amoeba or lichen range.

* Project IMAO – testing uncontrolled fission reactions on natural planetary satellites.

All I know is that until they work the bugs out of the zero-G toilets, I’m staying indoors during “meteor showers”.