[photo courtesy of Jimmy]

A holiday ponderment:

Why would Sarah Palin kill Rudolph?

Here are my theories:

* He wouldn’t stop humming “Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer”.

* She found out he was the real father of Bristol’s baby.

* He called her “Tina”.

* She does that to everyone who claims that Article I of the Constitution defines the role of the Vice President. Haven’t you noticed how twitchy Biden’s been since the debate?

* It wasn’t Palin. Cheney mistook Rudolph for a lawyer.

* We’ll never know the real reason, because it’s locked up in a vault in Hawaii next to Obama’s birth certificate.

* From a distance, that nose can easily be mistaken for a laser sight. Any sane jury would call that self-defense.

* Halloween, a moose costume, and someone who didn’t say “trick or treat” fast enough.

* Sarah’s just the patsy. It was really the guy on the grassy knoll.

* Palin hates political corruption, and Rudolph was Senate Candidate Number 5

* He was the one who told George Lucas “Episode I really needs a goofy animated character to act as the plucky comic relief”.

What’s YOUR conspiracy theory?