The North Korean missile fell into the ocean, but North Korea claims they put a satellite into orbit and that it’s “broadcasting patriotic songs”. Why does the media even tell us what North Korea claims? Why don’t just say, “And North Korea claimed some deluded crap that no one believes.” Still, it got me thinking: What are North Korean patriotic songs? I did some Googling and here is what I found:
* “North Korea: The Second Best Korea”
* “I’m Starving, But I Don’t Care,
‘Cause My Leader’s Got Poofy Hair”
* “Fear Our Powerful Dongs!”
Anyway, I assume Obama will respond forcefully to all this as soon as he gets his head unstuck from a bucket.
Some songs I play to annoy people:
We shall hold our Bayonets more Firmly
Wish of Health to Kim Jung Il
Peasant’s Ballad
Song of Kim Il Sung
Song of Kim Jung Il
These songs are a either military marches or pop music performed by a big (Korean style) band
Sling….
Sling a dong…
It ain’t nasty….
It ain’t wrooooongggg.
Who cares if they’re not good enough,
For anyone else but Kim…
Just sling….
Sling a dooooooonnnnnngggg!
Song of Kim Jung Il:
1.Mt. Paektu reaches across
To shape our beautiful land.
Cheers resound all over the land,
Hailing our dear General.
He’s the leader of the people,
Carrying forward the Sun’s cause.
Long live, long live, General Kim Jong Il.
2. All blossoms on this earth
Tell of his love, broad and warm.
Blue East and West Seas sing
His exploits in their song.
He is the artist of great joy,
Glorifying the garden of Juche.
Long live, long live, General Kim Jong Il.
3. Socialist cause he defends
With iron will and courage.
He raises national honour
Far and wide throughout the world.
He is the champion of justice,
Standing for independence.
Long live, long live, General Kim Jong Il.
[This is for real? Wow. -Ed.]
#3 Ed.,
Yes. You can download it for free online, because we don’t care about North Korean copyright laws (if they have any), the lyrics can be found online as well, and it can be found on YouTube:
“Dear Leader Comrade Generalissimo Kim Jong Il is the great brilliant commander of Songun, the invincible strategist twenty-eight thousand times victorious against the criminal US imperialist, the reactionary Japanese militarists, and the US-puppet south Korean dictatorship. Under the flawless Songun-based leadership of Dear Leader Comrade Generalissimo Kim Jong Il the brilliant statesman, political genius, prodigious humanist, and invincible military commander, the Korean people vow eternal undying loyalty of single-minded unity to the leader, pledging to hurl their lives at the outsider aggressors in defence of the leader who is more precious than their own lives.”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hp7RkdvyDDI&feature=related
I, for one, agree with Barry. We can reason with these people.
Almost as a general principle of statecraft, these goofs should get a complete smackdown – just on the basis of disabusing them of such preposterous claptrap. “Twenty-eight thousand times victorious” – really? It’s not 25,726, or 31,008? EXACTLY 28,000? This missile was the big round number?
I do believe that such songs exist as Michael R. has listed. It’s too bad that our President and his supporters think the lyrics apply to HIM. (Though what a Finnish goth-rock band has to do with it is anybody’s guess.)
I’m So Ronery
So ronery
So ronery and sadry arone
There’s no one
Just me onry
Sitting on my rittle throne
I work rearry hard and make up great prans
But nobody ristens, no one understands
Seems like no one takes me serirousry
And so I’m ronery
A rittle ronery
Poor rittle me
There’s nobody
I can rerate to
Feel rike a bird in a cage
It’s kinda sihry
But not rearry
Because it’s fihring my body with rage
I’m the smartest most crever most physicarry fit
But nobody else seems to rearize it
When I change the world maybe they’ll notice me
But until then I’rr just be ronery
Rittle ronery, poor rittle me
I’m so ronery
Korea is the mother of the world
Kim Jong-Il is our dad
We have more than you in every way
That is why your jealous and so sad
Join the people in all their glory
We even shot a rocket in the air
The abundance of Korea is overflowing
Help us to revere Kim’s
Hey! What the hell? I wasn’t done. I want a reset button. Besides I was just getting warmed up. Last words were “splended hair”.
But really, when the choice is Barry or Kim Jong-Il I’m not so sure Kim doesn’t have something going for him. I hear he like John Wayne? And lat least we know how he treats the citizens. We really have’nt found out what Barry has in mind for us. It could be Kim has something to offer???
Just a matter of days before that one bows to the little retard. Counting down in 6 … 5 …
This begs the question: When will bho launch his own satellite to broadcast his own patriotic songs (and previous speeches)?
So if you sing off key, does that make you il? do they send you into orbit in their new patriotic stelite? Are you given an Ipod with that one’s speaches as punishmnet?
Idaho Spud-
I thought you left the last part of the refrain so that we may insert a lyric ourselves. I was thinking “derriere” as the last word. It just seems to fit & it rhymes with “in the air”.
With the bucket on O-bah-muhh’s head, he receives the transmissions from Kim Il Jong’s favorite hits( some of which have been listed above ). O-bah-muhh is going to have to install a band frequency knob on his bucket, so he can choose between Laika the space dog”s transmissions(sending signals to liberal tinfoil hats since 1957), and the dulcit tones of Kim Il Jong’s Long March Rocket songs.
(With deepest apologies to Flatt and Scruggs)
Let me tell you all a story of a man named Kim.
The free world folks can’t get a shot at him.
Th’other day his people were beggin for some food,
when up from the ground shot a big missle, dude.
Dong, that is.
Three stage.
Japan Sea.
The next thing you know Obama runs in there,
wags his index finger gives him a cold stare.
said, “What you, uh, did makes me um, uh , puke.
So what, um, we will do is, give up all our nukes.
Let’s give, you see,
er,um ,
peace a chance.”
~~~~
Now it’s time to say goodbye to Barack’s Hawaiian kin,
Thank to a random missle shot of Kim’s that’s droppin’ in.
You’re never gonna want to take a trip to that locality
Of smoldering glass and lava where Hawaii used to be.
Kim says,
“Be like
Barack now, y’hear?”
Obama will now write Kim another, more strern email. And this time he’s using ALL CAPS BABY!
Dong were is my Automobile?
Ding Dong! The Dong is dead. Which old Dong? The Korean Dong!
Ding Dong! The Korean Dong is dead.
(Okay, that’s all I got.)
CAPS LOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR FOREIGN RELATIONS.
#15 – Terry_Jim, Sa-Lute!
Just follow the yellowcake road!
I tried to make a missile,
but all it did was fizzle.
Where did I go wrong?
And now Obama won’t quit crying
about how I’m not complying…
If I only had a dong!
“There’s no prace rike home…and Obama can be my cowaldry rion!”
“Just follow the yellowcake road!” – AlanABQ
You made me snort, Alan.
Anything from the discography of Yoko Ono.