Here’s a helpful list of phrases not to say in front of a Muslim like “Freedom” and “Assimilation”. Seems to miss a few obvious ones, though, like “Technological Parasites”, “Pork Sandwich”, and “Overly-Sensitive Whiny Babies”.
Here’s a helpful list of phrases not to say in front of a Muslim like “Freedom” and “Assimilation”. Seems to miss a few obvious ones, though, like “Technological Parasites”, “Pork Sandwich”, and “Overly-Sensitive Whiny Babies”.
“Hussein”
“Live long and prosper”
Note corrected headline, with opposite meaning. Last shot of departing editor?
“Ten reasons not to print CSM on paper anymore.”
“There is no God but Teleprompter and Obama is his prophet.”
*knock on door* “Hello. Have you heard about the Kingdom of Heaven?”
has anyone noticed how close imao.us is to imso.us, the islamic multi service organisation?
Is that satire? Is there a rational Muslim who does not find that article offensive? If I trade Black, or Mexican for Muslim – the author would be lampooned as a racist moron.
Oh, and add, “Good morning, have you heard of The Church of Jesus Christ and the Latter Day Saints?” to the list.
Yet more excuses and whining from pansies that want us to believe terrorists are good people.
Assimilation. Yes if you live in north America or the U.S. you should assimilate to OUR culture. Is that not why you fled from your backwards existance?
I may pay attention to that list if I were to visit one of their countries, but if they are here; assimilate and be tolerant of the poor seculars.
Wow, That will be helpful to keep in mind if I ever reach a point in my life that I care what a Muslim thinks.
#1 There is no “Clash of Civilizations” one has to be civil to have a clash of them. I see no civility in coming to my country and telling me what I can say
#2 Secular may be deemed as godless to muslims, but to me the Unsecular, it means you are not Christian so yes I will still use the word Secular
#3 ALL WHO WANT TO LIVE IN THE UNITED STATES SHOULD ASSIMILATE OR GET THE HE** OUT OF HERE -NUFF SAID
#4 I cant even think of using the word Reformation in a scentence regarding muslims
#5 Jihadi – to me that means anyone who is of muslim faith that does not believe they must assimilate
#6 Moderate this word is just as insulting to me as it is to a non Judeo Christian person. There are not moderate muslims -the intent is to take over, there is no moderation in taking over
#7 Interfaith – A study done 2 years ago – ALL AMERICAN GI’s who married War Brides from Iraq HAD TO CONVERT TO MUSLIM FAITH – NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND. One who was KIA was even put to rest in the muslim tradition per the muslim wifes instructions. God help us – Interfaith? Refer back to #6
#8 Freedom – this is what I have to say any damed thing I feel like about anyone
#9 Religious Freedom – Again – This is what I have – This is not what a muslim has – Refer to #7
#10 Tolerance – Something the muslim world will probably NEVER have or accept. If you are not muslim you are as John Wayne would say “only good dead”
Do you suppose that there’s a list of things for Muslims not to say to those of us who choose to live in the civilized world?
“Achmed, want some bacon on your sandwich?
“Ummm, allah… no thanks.”
“Hey, let my dog in while I get us some beers, will ya? (bark, bark…)
(Turns white, opens door, backs into table, petrified.)
(Large German shepherd bounds in and growls.)
“Bozo – BE NICE!”
(Wife enters room wearing a bikini.)
“Oh, hi, honey! Achmed, this is Molly. Molly, Achmed.”
(Polite, cold handshake staring straight ahead.)
“So, what do you think about mixed religious marriages, Achmed?”
“John’s Catholic and I’m Jewish. We get along just fine.”
“Umm…. allaaaa alaam allaa alllaaaa…”
I’ll be sure to avoid those words and phrases when I bring up child brides, legalization of rape in Pakistan recently, how someone can be a prophet and never prophesy anything in his lifetime (therefore making him a false prophet and subject to stoning under the laws at the time), how highway robbery is one of three capital offenses under Sharia law (along with being non-muslim or a woman who commits “sexual sin” by, um, setting foot in public without an escort, etc.), and Mohammed early in his career robbed the very caravans that he used to be a part of, so why shouldn’t he have been executed under his own law? Mohammed would be arrested under modern laws and beheaded under his own.
Hmm – I don’t think I’ve used any banned phrases, have I?
Perhaps we should discuss Saudi exports of radical muslim schools worldwide, dhimmitude, and other such “good for thee but not for me” offenses next. We should be respected as equals if we are to be expected to respect as equals, should we not?
Other words and Phrases to avoid:
1. Soap
2. Hey, I think my head looks good where it’s currently located
3. While I appreciate the offer of wearing the explodey vest, I think I will choose the sweater vest
1] Blessed be the Lord God, King of the Universe,He teacheth my hands to war, and my fingers to fight. 2]Gee Mr. Nigerian, is it true that Islamists have learned how to transform themselves into goats? 3] You know the quran is silent about female genital mutilation, so why do you persist in this barbarism? 4] Mr. Iranian, is that nuclear technology software on your laptop, or are you just glad to see me? 5] Pardon me Ms. Islamist, I thought you were a phone booth. 6] Have you ever seen Jeff Dunham’s ventriliquist act, the one with Achmed the dead terrorist? I’m sure it would be a big hit in Tehran. 7] You know God gave the land of Israel to the joos forever, right? 8] Mr.Imam, are the joos the pigs and the christians the apes,or is it the other way around? Enlighten me will you? 9]Sure America wil embrace the meanig of the word Islam, after all, it worked so well for King George back in the day. 10] Mr. Islamist, I’ve read the meaning of ‘al taqqiya’, so why am I to believe that Islam is the religion of peace, given the evidence to the contrary?>>>>>>> ( limited to 10, but we all can think of more)
What a stooge! The tolerance one was a hoot. “We need to…. respect one another enough to name our differences and commonalities, according to the inherent dignity we each have as fellow creations of God called to walk together in peace and justice, mercy and compassion.”
Um yeah and if you don’t, we will strap bombs to our children and send them into your midst.
Derka. Derka. Derka.
I bet you or your alter ego Harvey could compile a better list of What Not to Say to Muslims. Start with:
“Would you mind watching my bag for a minute while I check in with the ticket agent?”
… and go from there.
Muslims don’t like to be reminded of things that hit a little too close to home, such as…
Never talk about the 72 Virgins with your Muslim friend when passing an elementary school.
Never shake hands with a Muslim using your left hand. Remember that YOU wipe with your right hand, then say “salaam,” and smile quietly to yourself.
Never accompany a Muslim to a cutlery shop, a saw sharpening establishment, or a place that sells guillotines.
Don’t ask a Muslim if they would like to try the other white meat.
Don’t let your daughter sell Girl Scout Cookies during Ramadan if you live in Dearborn, Michigan.
Many Muslims carry a compass so they can find east when it’s time to pray. Try carrying a powerful magnet in your pocket just for the hell of it.
I don’t give a flying f#@k what the Jews, Christians,and galgamecians think of what I have to say — So what makes you think the a$$hole towel heads could make me curb my language. If saying that” Muhamed was the original terrorist ” pisses somone off I DONT CARE!!!!
“…Is that satire? Is there a rational Muslim who does not find that article offensive?…”
Is there a rational Muslim?
So, we’re not to mention TOLERANCE, RELIGIOUS FREEDOM, FREEDOM, or SECULARISM to Muslims.
It might radicalize them and turn them into JIHADIs.
I for one am going to alter my vocabulary…to use those terms at least 3 times more often than I have already.
I don’t suppose they have much use for classical poetry then.
‘As one I mark’d, torn from the chin throughout
Down to the hinder passage: ‘twixt the legs
Dangling his entrails hung, the midriff lay
Open to view, and wretched ventricle,
That turns the englutted aliment to dross.
Whilst eagerly I fix on him my gaze,
He eyed me, with his hands laid his breast bare,
and cried, “Now mark how I do rip me: lo!
How is Mahomet mangled: before me
Walks Ali weeping, from the chin his face
Cleft to the forelock: and the others all,
Whom here thou seest, while they lived, did sow
Scandal and schism, and therefore thus are rent.”‘
– Dante, The Divine Comedy, Canto XXVIII,
Hell, The eighth circle (Malebolge), The ninth gulf.
(sowers of scandal, schismatics and heretics).
Seriously, making generalizations about Muslims is just juvenile. If you spent any time researching their world, you’d find that about 5% of them are extremists. Among american christians, 25% are evangelicals who talk to god in tongues and refuse basic science. It takes a true person of faith to look within critically. Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.
These Muslims are contemptuous of the obsequious. They will actually respect you more if you take a principled stand; something such as “if you want to talk to me, then learn MY language.”
I’ve got a few things I don’t want to hear from them………like the sound of them breathing for one. The other is “Islam is a religion of peace”, and “convert or die” and “kill the infidel” (I apparently am one of the few American, with the exceptions of most of the folks here at IMAO, who understand that that term “infidel” means me, my family, my community, my church and my nation).
I tolerate their existence because as a Christian my God tells me I have to. Unlike their god who tells them they can maim. rape, destroy and murder. Huh……..I wonder which deity teaches correct principles. Kind’a makes you say Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm. But then since I’ve pointed that out I have firmly and decisively confirmed that I am a religious bigot. (I really only have a problem with people who threaten to harm all I hold dear, Buddists, Wiccans, Taoists et al, I’ve got no problem with them.
I like it when seanmahair posts here. Just sayin.
And LOL #14.
What not to say to Muslims: “Are you washed in the blood of the Lamb?” or “Do you know Jesus Christ as your personal savior?” (actually that’s probably what Christians should say)
This thread would be a funny spoof of TLC’s makeover show: What Not To Say To Muslims. Some clever conservative filmmaker should get right on it.
Having Muslims over at your house:
No, no, no! Ali! The diaper goes on the baby’s butt, not on your head.
No, you can’t borrow my checkered tablecloth or my bungee cords!
Please leave the neighbor’s goat alone!
And please take my jock strap off of your wife’s face.
shawn fleek,
Instead of “researching their world,” you should read their books: the Quran and the Hadith. Their religion is extreme, and anything but peaceful.
If Shawn fleek keeps getting his info on Evangelicals from Rosie ODonnel and Bill Mahr, he should plant a garden, because he’ll never lack for fertilizer.
Son of Bob – The Bible is also full of non-sensical bull. Stoning virgins and owning wives. Are you smart enough to overlook the questionable parts for the morals? I’ll bet you are. As are most Muslims able to overlook the worst parts for the better of the Quran. Hadith are oral traditions that are bastardized by certain extremists, the way a lot of Bible-thumpers used the Bible to justify slavery, war, segregation of schools, marriage, races, etc. You are probably a white person, living somewhere in America, likely belong to a religion you violate often, and have no respect for people who live in underdeveloped countries. It’s 1919 in some places, get used to it, start trying to accept that America is 5% of the planet. Three hundred million out of 6 and a half billion.
5 0f 7 – I don’t even watch TV, you jerk. And when I get my news, I get it the same place you do, a biased news outlet. I refuse to let celebrities dictate politics to me by virtue of being in front of a camera, or microphone for that matter.