Makin’ Bacon out of a Molehill

Well, well, well.

It’s seems I got somebody’s goat. Or pig. Or something.

A post I wrote that appeared both on my little blog and at IMAO has garnered the attention of Ace of Spades HQ. Okay, it was the IMAO posting. They’ve never heard of my little blog.

The took extreme exception to my ridiculing the purchase of ham by the government. The government didn’t like people poking fun at them either. The Secretary of Agriculture went so far as to issue a statement that they bought a lot of ham for that price, not just 2 pounds. They said they paid $1.50/lb., which is about twice what you can find it for on sale at your favorite grocery store.

Heck, I thought we did good, poking fun at government spending. I even got a jab in on the Twitter, saying that “In 6 months, Obama has taken government spending from pork to ham.” Some folks didn’t get it, completely unaware that ham is a special cut of pork, missing the backhanded jab.

So, what’s Ace of Spades HQ — good folks, by the way — got to do with all this?

It seems they’ve declared war on IMAO over it. Because I “dared to insult ham and by association all other delicious pork products (including bacon) by questioning its value under current economic recovery programs.”

I understand why they’re targeting IMAO. It’s one of the big fish. My little blog is … well, small. It’s not worth their efforts. They’re targeting the big boys. Like when weasel lawyers go after big companies when some regular guy does something to offend some thin-skinned cry-baby. IMAO is the big blog, so Frank J., Harvey, SarahK, spacemonkey, Right Wing Duck, et al, are now targeted. Over something that I wrote.

Well, let’s set the record straight, shall we?

I was called “a blogger named after an herb.” They are referring to “basil,” pronounced “BAY-sill.” In fact, my name is “Basil,” pronounced “BAZ-il,” a name of Latin origin that means “kingly.”

My love of pork? I would not say that it’s legendary, but I would say it goes back as far as I can remember. I dare say I’ve slopped more hogs than most of the commenters … and bloggers … at Ace of Spades HQ. I’d wager that many of them have never heard of slopping hogs.

Most of them have only been to pig barbeques in just one state, much less in multiple countries, as have I.

How many of them, I wonder, can say that their relatives were known for the pork products they served in their hometown?

Yeah, that’s what I thought.

Bacon is a regular around here at breakfast. As it should be.

Unless I eat breakfast on the way to work. Then, it’s either bacon or sausage, depending on my mood. And where I eat. If it’s Cracker Barrel, then it’s ham, bacon, and sausage (the Sunrise Sampler®).

And, it’s just not Christmas around the house here without ham sandwiches while we open presents. Ah, the smell of the Christmas ham cooking when morning comes!

Heck, I bet these supposed pig experts don’t even know the words to Peter Percival Patterson’s Pet Pig Porky. I had the album.

However, I will say that I’m not ape-sh*t crazy over pork products. And, I like Spam®, because it’s made of pork shoulder and ham. It tastes great. It’s spam (UCE) that I don’t like. Many pork purists don’t care for Spam®. But they probably don’t like peanut butter and jelly.

So, if the folks at Ace of Spades HQ have a problem with anyone, it’s with me. Not with the good folks at IMAO. Heck, guys, check out the sidebar! I’m listed on the blogroll, not as one of the official bloggers list. I’m merely a guest. Frank J. has been kind enough to allow me to post from time to time. Taking aim at Frank J. is unfair.

If any of the pork posers at Ace of Spades HQ have a problem, it’s with me.

And, if any want to settle this, we can settle it like men. That’s right: Barbeque pork ribs at 20 paces. Warning: I’m from Georgia; I’ll make you squeal like a pig.

47 Comments

  1. Give it up, Basil – the AoS overnight morons do not feel pity, or remorse, or fear, or some of our extremities. And we absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are assimilated, then wrapped in bacon, and then maybe tempura-fried.

    Because that’s they way we roll.

  2. Oh heck! I can’t go to war without my dinosaur! What is going on with that program? Well, if it’s a food fight they want, I should forewarn them that I am an expert in several forms of potluck. As a Baptist pastor’s wife, it has been required of me that I learn many forms of pork casserole. Not bragging or anything, just sayin’…you could all probably kick my shins out from under me with your uber ronin ways, but if we’re talking a pork fight, I come prepared from many little blue haired ladies before me.

  3. Pingback: Hot Red-on-Red Action. | Little Miss Attila

  4. Most of them have only been to pig barbeques in just one state, much less in multiple countries, as have I.

    I resemble that remark. I’ve been to pig BBQs in 3 states: drunk, hammered, & coma.

  5. AoS is advocating for pork and pork related products. As my cardiologist can attest, I love pork in most all of it’s various delicious iterations, but if AoS is including chitlins then they are in for a fight!

  6. Do I have free reign to post a comment about something I clearly know little about, probably miss some comical satire, and insult everyone on multiple threads by questioning patriotism and sexuality?

    Or should I just mention that we need more lemon Pledge?

  7. Basil : I too spent much of my childhood slopping hogs. I worked feeding the pigs and cows from the 5th grade untill I got out of school. Best part was we always had pork and beef in the freezer. RightWingKiller said it best”Joke’em if they can’t take a f**k”

  8. BHO gets insulted if you question his love of pork spending. Basil loves him some him, but likes his pork too. And AoS turns out to be Bazilbub: The pork lovin’ terrizt Devil? Yeah, sounds about right.

    You can have my hock when you pry it from my cold greasy ……….. ooffffff ouch ……. that big guys hands.

  9. I was torn, I comment and read both blogs.

    I totally understand your point about attacking the big blogs.

    Nobody around here would do anything like, oh say, making up filthy lies to get a bigger blogger to link to them to get their name out.

    But I might have to declare for Ace O Spades after you said this
    If it’s Cracker Barrel,

    And you eat pork products there? Next you’ll be telling me you like those nutty, cheese rolls.

    Dude. That’s not food, that’s food-ish.

  10. IMAO insulted pork products? Hardly! No blog has done more to defend the honor of pork by demanding that its good name not be sullied by association with the govermnment.

    When people here demand that Congress and the Obama administration stop filling bills with pork it isn’t because we expect to improve government – we know that won’t happen any time soon. No, it is because we don’t wish for the good and noble pig to be defiled by association with Democrats.

    Take it back, Ace.

  11. Peter Percival Pattersons’ Pet Pig Porky? I haven’t heard that in many decades. Thanks for reminding me.

    NOW I remember where it was from…The Monkees! Oh you bastard! That’s like remembering a specific hangnail.
    But I was a kid then & enjoyed their show.

    Ace & IMAO in a war? Oh heaven forfend! My 2 bestest blogs are exchanging naughties.
    Over bacon. Delicious bacon. Smothering warm & fuzzy in the morning bacon. Unconscious bacon. Unexplained bacon.
    I guess Genghis had a brainfart and thought it’d make a good overnight thread. (Notice: Posted by permission of AceCorp LLC. Please e-mail overnight open thread tips to xgenghisx@gmail.com. Otherwise send tips to Ace.) Which it did. People posting at 4am about lace wigs and Japanese scat pr0n. Which reminds me, why is Dummie Funnies the only blog announcing the acronym of Obambis’ health care initiative? You wanna know what that acronym is, don’tcha.
    Quality, Affordable Health Coverage for All Americans

    QAHCAA
    Say it out loud, with feeling……louder and funnier!

    And it’s for real.

  12. “If any of the pork posers at Ace of Spades HQ have a problem, it’s with me.

    And, if any want to settle this, we can settle it like men. That’s right: Barbeque pork ribs at 20 paces. Warning: I’m from Georgia; I’ll make you squeal like a pig.”

    For much or your speech, I thought “Here go again, appeasing some blog character so minor his name is”Open Blog”. But then you stood up and showed your mettle. NEVER give in to the Pork Koreans. The only way to deal with these people is threaten Hamaggedon.

  13. THIS. IS. I. M. A.OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO !!!!!

    I must go to this Ace of Spades Place…. and kill them. They have insulted the honor of IMAO and its “contributors”! Form the Legions and prepare to march!

  14. As a longtime critic of the innovative content at both major news sites IMAO and AoSHQ, I find all of this rather stimulating. Very seldom does one get deep, thoughtful, and engaging analysis of the combat-theoretic aspects of porcine derivatives in a competitive setting.

    It appears that the insufferable ninnies at mu.nu owe you an apology, Frank. Perhaps a repost of the original ham slam would be in order, so they come to understand how egregious was their error in failing to identify the true author of the material.

  15. I heard Basil is slang for “leaf eater” in Kenya.
    “Kingly” my left foot, you arugula munching nancy boy. Maybe king of the perez hilton fan club. I bet that’s some pork you’d love to get behind.

    [Only after I’m done with you, boy; only after I’m done with you. – B]

  16. At least I’ll be facing you when you taste the bacon, king of basil.
    You know, I’m personally appalled at the lack of agression being shown by fellow AoSHQ morons.

    [Lots of the same audience, I suppose. How does one get angry and beat up one’s self? In public, I mean. – B]

  17. Watch out Basil, Johnathon is legendary when it comes to pulled pork. My Va. Country Ham has your back though. And somebody pass the sweet tea, please.

    [Pulled pork? Heaven. Pure heaven. That is the proper way to do pork. – B]

  18. Uh Oh, they’ve got Harvey into the fight. That means the Bad Example Family is gearing up. Let’s see, what can I bring to the fight? Hmm, pork chops? Check. Ribs? Check. Check. Ham? Check.Pork tenderloin? Check Canned Spam in case fresh supplies get tight? Check. Bacon? Check. Sausage? Check. Beefsteak? Check. (You never know how the fight might spread.)
    Reporting for Duty, Harv! Somebody send the coordinates of AOSHQ and I’ll start lobbing mayhem their way.
    And I think I’m safe from attack, my Pugs have turned into ravenous beasts at the mere mention of bacon! I think I have some PVC pipe around and lots of lighter fluid, I’ll make up a pork product mortar and we’ll blast ’em.

  19. I think we’ve actually stumbled upon the one type of warfare even the most extremist jihadi has no stomach for.
    We should focus our ham-related energy towards defeating the pork-hating terrorists, for they fear our bacony justice. The steaks pork chops have never been higher and

    …wait, your name is Basil??? All this time I’ve been calling you Oregano.

    [Eh. Been called worse. – B]

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