I was thinking it’s time for a fourth CSI show. I mean, there are still plenty of Who songs unused as theme songs. Here’s some ideas I had:
CSI: Boise – “Spectral analysis shows this fool done got himself shot.”
CSI: Middle East – “By trace analysis, we have concluded this was done BY THE JOOOOS!!”
CSI: Antarctica – It would take some good writing to make sure the culprit isn’t always seals.
CSI: Sunnydale – “Stick to the science… unless you think magic is involved.”
CSI: Congress – “I’m pretty sure someone here is lying.”
CSI: Chicago – “This doesn’t make any sense: It appears to be a bullet wound, but handguns are banned in this city.”
CSI: D.C. – “The corpse of the Constitution was found naked, lying in a stream. I think money was involved.”
CSI: Chicago – “Can’t we just arrest ALL the ‘politicians’?”
CSI: Sacramento – “It uppeerz dat dis man died of a gunshot wund, und vas killed by somevun who wuss not originally frum Kaleefornia, but I dun think it had anyting to do vit der undocumented aleenz.”
CSI: Italy – “Here’s some gratutious shots of rooftops, because we didn’t quite understand why CSI shows aerial shots of cities that are attractive from the air, plus there’s five times the characters and fifty million times the angst”
Oh, my bad. They actually did that.
CSI: Hollywood – “Sure the evidence is indesputable, he killed all six of them in cold blood. But you can’t prosecute him, he’s a celebrity.”
CSI: IMAO – “Looks like this moon was destroyed…[puts on sunglasses] IMAO style.”
[cue loud rock song]
CSI: Star Trek ” I think he’s dead Jim.”
CSI: Wherever it is that Fred Thompson lives – “A good investigator don’t take a dump, son…[lights cigar] without a plan.”
[cue Haggard’s The Fightin’ Side Of Me]
I see a recurring dilemma the CSI Boise:
Stereotypical Bruckheimer Medical Examiner:”It appears the victim was shot with a 357, and a 45 hollow point.”
Stereotypical Bruckheimer Supporting Character: “How are we going to figure this out? Everyone in Boise has 357 and a 45. Hell I just gave my nephew a Beretta for his 3rd birthday this week.”
CSI: Waycross – That boy done gone and stole more chain than he could swim with.
CSI- Los Angeles- Viva Mexico! Si podemos crusar illigalmente!
CSI: DIY – “Just think how much we’re savin’ on courtrooms and prison cells!”
CSI: Gitmo- Based upon his wet face and the information we’ve gathered, we havent waterboarded him enough.
CSI: Barney Franks House – “Back up the truck boys, there’s a whole lot of DNA evidence in there.”
CSI: Washington – “Pulse or not, Pelosi looks dead enough for an autopsy.”
CSI: UN- I don’t care what the crime is, condemn Israel and send the bill to the US.
CSI: Lancaster – “The pitchfork in his chest and the shoo-fly pie shoved down his throat leads to the obvious conclusion the Amish did it…………………….or DID they?!?!
CSI: Hazzard County- “DNA evidence indicates they’re ALL related to the victim.”
CSI Daily Kos/DU: Who cares about evidence? Blame it on Booosh !!!!
I’ve been saying for years that they need a “CSI: Rio Linda” “Ah nuw the killer was Jim-Bob, cus the bite mark on the body still has one toof left”
I’ve even got the perfect Who song for the opening: “Join Together” It’s got that little bwerng bwong bwoong mouth harp sound at the beginning.
CSI:Los Angles: Based on the green jello and “funeral” potatoes, this gay got himself done in by the Mormons.
CSI:South Park: They killed Kenny! Bastards!
CSI: South Park: Oh my God! They killed Kenny! You Bastards!
FIFY 😉
CSI D.C. — “It looks like this teleprompter committed suicide….”
CSI Sesame Street: This murder brought to you by the number 5 and the letter H.
CSI Antarctica? I never really was a fan of the club scene – nyuk nyuk!
CSI : Deep South “There’s no dental records, and all of the DNA matches!”
CSI: San Francisco – : “The victim appears to have been beaten to death by a leather bar. But which one? There are 25 on this street alone.”