I never thought Al Franken was amusing as a comedian.
I considered him a dull, plodding abomination as a radio talk show host.
As a Senator, I’m willing to bet he’s gonna be just another partisan liberal dung heap.
But MAN! That guy can freehand draw a map of the US like nobody’s business:
Seriously, if I didn’t hate him on a deeply personal level, I’d give him a standing ovation and say “DUDE! That was freakin’ AWESOME!”.
Note: I’m not sure if this will be my last post here or not, but I wanted to make sure to get this posted. Since tomorrow is a day more appropriate for quiet reflection than for silliness, I decided to put it up today…
Being a well-mannered guest, I thought it would be appropriate to give Frank J. a little gift as a token of appreciation for letting me blog here while he was off bagging the limit on hippies. But what to give the blogger who has everything?
Well, Frank, hold on to your butt…
Meet Fred!
Fred is a genetically engineered weaponized cyborg-dinosaur with a combination rocket launcher/nuclear-powered laser cannon mounted on his back, just like you always wanted!
Just remember, Frank, “All dinosaurs with rocket launchers on them want is love.” Oh, and hippies. Feed him hippies. Lots and lots of hippies! Just put up some signs around his pasture like “Free hemp! All you can carry!” and he’ll take care of the rest. His hunting instinct is keyed to the smell of Patchouli oil, so you and your friends should be safe, so long as none of you wave any commie flags or wear Che t-shirts near him. Oh… and for Heaven’s sake, whatever you do, never utter the phrase “Allahu akbar!”
Now, I know what you’re saying. “Sure, he looks cool, but does he really work?”
Well, I think a little demonstration may be in order…
So, be honest now, what do you think? Did we do good?
Best of all, our team of geneticists is currently putting the finishing touches on the female version of what we like to call the Awesom-o-saurus Wrexx! After “Sarah” has been hatched and raised to a proper age, we hope to breed her with “Fred” to create a new race of super weapons that will guarantee nobody ever again “squeetlebumkins” with the USA!
Enjoy, Frank! Take good care of him and remember to only point him at things you don’t want to see continuing to exist for more than a few seconds.
And thanks again for having me over, it’s been a blast!
And thanks also to Basil and Harvey for all their help this past week, and to all the readers here at IMAO. You guys rock!
Bye-bye, kids! Be sure to pop by and visit me at America is an Obamanation! and The Right Place once in a while.
Fox News Legal Analyst Peter Johnson Jr. says he wants to hear 4 words from Obama:
“I hear you, America.”
He didn’t exactly read my mind on that one.
So let’s see… what 4 words would *I* want to hear from That One?
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* “Here’s my birth certificate”
* “Michelle… that dress… tacky.”
* “Commie czars – all fired”
* “Ronald Reagan was right”
* “Let’s kill some terrorists!”
* “No more f@#$ing bailouts!”
* “I suck. I resign”
* “Michael Moore – shut up!”
* “Less taxing, less spending”
* “Southern border – BIG wall”
* “I’m sorry, Officer Crowley”
* “Won’t run for re-election”
What four words do YOU want to hear from Obama?
Sorry to interrupt teh funneh, but I wanted to throw this in…
Over at my little blog, I wrote about a serious piece about a WordPress worm that’s going around. It’s hit some major blogs so far.
If you have your own WordPress blog (NOT hosted at wordpress.com), you might want to give it a read. It might be useful.
If you don’t have a WordPress blog, you won’t care.
