In the GMail

Look at this e-mail I just got:

Frank,

I noticed you have a few thousand in savings. Please don’t spend any of it because I already have plans for it. Also, you’re out of Doritos.

kthxbai,
President Obama

I’m really starting to think Obama doesn’t understand the American ideal of privacy and freedom. Plus, he’s a mooch. Here’s what I wrote back:

Barry,

That’s my money! I’m going to buy a bouncy castle and usurp the king and declare myself “Lord of Bounce.” Why don’t you just admit you don’t know what you’re doing, you’re losing all our money, and you have stupid ears and then go resign. And those were Fiery Habanero Doritos! You have to go to Mexico to get those! You suck!

-Frank J.

I’ll tell you if he writes back.

24 Comments

  1. Frank J,

    That’s ridiculous to think that Barry could have written that email. Everyone knows, if Barry wanted more Doritos he’d just unconstitutionally take over the Frito-Lay company, render its stocks worthless, fire the CEO and command they only make the flavor he likes and deliver them to him on demand.

  2. Gotta agree with Son of Bob on this one. It is ridiculous to think hussein wrote that letter. Everyone knows puppets can’t write.
    Besides, Doritos is food for peasants, not the likes of his godessness, he only likes waffle flavored arugala.

  3. Plentyobailouts is wrong … dead wrong, IYKWIMAITYD … on the important issue of the diet favored by Lord Teleprompter. Plenty’s word amount to a vicious slur and heinous attack, a well-nigh treasonous assault on our Commander-in-Chief in time of war, with troops in the field. Need I remind you that lives are at stake?

    Because he not only likes waffle flavored arugala, but arugula flavored waffes, as well.

  4. You know, for the record, I’ve given up Doritos due to flatulence caused by some mysterious combination of enzyme deficiencies. However, Mr. Obama seems quite concerned regarding Frank’s supply of them. While I have my suspicions, I’d really like to know WHY? – straight from the hOrses a$$, I would. Perhaps, Frank will get that return email from the President and we’ll find out.

  5. Why would anyone want a mexican flavored fried corn tortillia? Thats the problem with this country…people dont buy merican no mo! You keep your foreign fried tortillia! Im sticking with BBQ Potato Chips….like a real patriot !

    Dang wurld is fallin apart!

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