Archive of entries posted on 1st June 2010

lolbama! Part 41

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This week, That One. Next week, terrorists. Submit for either at lolterizt@gmail.com

Meanwhile, pass ’em around, spread the love, and if you make your own, don’t be shy about dropping a link to your pics in the comments. The more, the merrier.

NOTE TO READERS: Hovering your mouse over the picture activates closed captioning for the l33t-speak/txtmsg impaired.

From Kris:

[reference link]

From Kris:

From Kris:

From Stephen:

From Stephen:

[reference link]

From Stephen:

From Stephen:

My favorites from the submissions using last edition’s uncaptioned picture:

From Hart of That Hero:

From Hart of That Hero:

From Kris:

From Kris:

From Kris:

From Kris:

From PBrown:

From Outback Jon:

[reference link]

This week’s uncaptioned picture for you to play with:

PRODUCTION NOTES:
#1: When creating lolbama! pictures, please caption with either black or white text, as colors like red and yellow tend to blur badly when I compress the images.

#2: Standard image size for these posts is 350px wide by whatever high. If you can have your images 350px wide before you caption them, I won’t end up shrinking your captions into illegibility when I re-size the images.

MAKE YOUR OWN: The free lolbuilder from I Can Has Cheezburger.

STYLE NOTE: Short captions are usually better. Your goal is 10 words or less, with humor value tending to increase exponentially as the number of words approaches 1.

Send your submissions to lolterizt@gmail.com and – if they aren’t obscene (IMAO is a PG-13 site) and don’t suck too terribly bad – I’ll post them for you. Remember to include your name (and blog URL, if applicable) so I know who to thank.

In Case You Missed It

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In case you missed it over the Memorial Day weekend, here’s my Pajamas Media column again. I think I make a good point in this one on what the left needs to do to communicate to conservatives effectively.

20 Hottest Women on the Right

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John Hawkins has a new list of the 20 Hottest Women on the Right. Women in general tend to lean more left than men since the liberal positions are the girly positions on issues, but hot women — that’s another story.

Still, should we being judging women on their appearance or on how hard they punch hippies in their dumb monkey faces?

Israel’s Restraint

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I don’t get this whole flotilla thing. So Israel kills a bunch of peace activists and everyone is mad… even though they’re like super-murdery peace activists — the sort of peace activist who want nothing more than war. And as usual, the left’s opinion is if you’re not wholeheartedly on the side of those who want to commit genocide, you’re a racist.

Israel is in a funny position because they’re surrounded by people who want to genocide them, but because all those people are too pathetic to actually be able to go through their genocide plans, Israel is supposed to be nice to them. It’s like if in Germany the Nazis weren’t the ones ruling the country but were instead an oppressed minority. Even though their intentions are very evil, because they suck everyone is supposed to feel bad for them.

Now, back in the day, if some group wanted to genocide you and you could easily crush them, they’d be crushed. If the Palestinians were more powerful than Israel, that’s what would happen. But in the civilized world, that’s a no-no. So we have Israel trying to live with and be nice to those who deep down want to genocide them. I think they do a pretty good job at that. Sure, they kill a few people on flotillas now and then, but it’s not like they saturation bomb the Palestinians. And what if they did wipe out the Palestinians, what would happen? They’d get yelled at and get a U.N. condemnation — basically Israel’s average Tuesday. So the only reason they don’t kill everybody is because they want to be good guys.

So, I just want to tell Israel: You guys are really nice for not going to ballistic and killing everyone around you. That’s some huge restraint on your part and I appreciate it.

The Non-Job Offer

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So the White House’s official story on whether they bribed Sestak with a job to get him to drop of the Senate race was that they sent Bill Clinton to offer Sestak an unpaid advisory position that he’d have to drop out of Congress for. That’s the story they spent so long making up? So I guess while they’re not admitting to anything illegal, they are admitting to being extremely moronic.

Still, we can’t dismiss the story completely. To think someone would jump at the chance to work with you in an unpaid advisory position takes a huge amount of arrogance, and that does fit Obama. Still, I’m guessing bribing people with jobs was pretty common practice in Chicago and Obama was just caught unaware it was actually illegal; naive and ignorant sounds like him too.

So what should we do with Obama? I’m happy if as punishment he has to write an essay on why bribing is wrong. That way, we’d at least know he’s learned something. So far, it seems like Obama isn’t anymore experienced now than when he was first picked to be president after his two week internship in the Senate. After his presidency, I at least want to say, “Yeah, he may have destroyed the country, but he really learned some important lessons doing it.”

Random Thoughts

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AP: WH says it was Bill Clinton who tried to charm Sestak into dropping out of the race. A cigar was involved.

So the WH didn’t bribe Sestak, they just sent former president Bill Clinton to see if he’d be open to a bribe?

Just to be clear, that the WH thought Sestak might drop out of the Senate race for an unpaid job is a believable story?

To try and raise approval rating, Obama is going to offer all Americans unpaid work.

BP: “Who would have thought dumping tons of mud on the problem would work, but then again it always helped with environmental protesters.”

Not listening to the Sestak presser; has he used the phrase “That’s the ticket!” yet?

Decided now is the time for me to finally try on some facial hair. Growing a goatee. If that doesn’t work out – starburns!

I don’t know if something illegal went on with Sestak’s job offer, but we can be 100% certain something moronic happened.

Nesting instinct? If I knew getting my wife pregnant would make her want to clean the house, I would have done it sooner.

So is the timeline in the new JJ Abrams Star Trek really just Captain Kirk’s purgatory?

I am halfway through the 2nd draft of my novel. Little by little, it will eventually be done. I alternate between thinking it’s pretty good and thinking it’s crap. I hope that’s normal.

I’m jealous my brother got a job where he has to wear a suit every day. I’ve never had a job where they cared whether I looked like a hobo. Actually, if you’re an engineer and wear a suit, they probably thing you’re a poseur and won’t know how to do anything practical. When I wore a suit to interview for my current job, first interview question was, “You think you’re better than us?”

For trying to be nice to a group that wants to genocide them, I think Israel does reasonably well.

Just saw Avatar finally. It’s ranked 93 in the top 250 movies on IMDB? Really? I swear they fed clichés into a computer program and it wrote the script. Pretty, though.

Unobtanium? Isn’t that a placeholder in your script until you come up with an actual name for your MacGuffin?

If Avatar is #93, I should be able to dangle keys in front of a camera for an hour and get that ranked at least 150 on IMDB.

With two billion dollar grossing movies in a row, I certainly can’t question James Cameron’s competence, though. Someone must like them.

The Princess Bride is #181 on IMDB and Avatar is #93. In what universe does that make sense?

Michael Cera only plays one character, but he is the only person who plays that character so it’s good business for him. If there comes an actor who can play Michael Cera for much cheaper, then he’s in trouble.