Apparently, Tansocean — the largest offshore drilling contractor — bans its employees from having knives. This nearly killed some people on the BP rig because they weren’t able to cut the rope to a life boat.

Let’s analyze this like like we’re not morons for a minute. You have employees that you don’t trust around sharp objects because you’re afraid they’ll randomly stab each other, but you do trust them to be in charge of equipment that if damages can cause one of the greatest ecological disasters in human history?

Are there really people out there who think that complete psychopaths can function normally in society as long as we keep dangerous objects out of arm’s reach? Or is it that people just say, “Knives are sharp! Let’s get rid of them!” and then don’t think any beyond that? These are the marks of people too stupid to function in normal society. They should be locked away and kept from dangerous weapons… except they somehow always end up in charge of making policy. These were the people who were unable to sharpen a rock in the caveman days and then got stepped on by large creatures. Unfortunately, we no longer have something to sort the useful people from the idiots like a woolly mammoth anymore.

Ron Paul thinks that Republicans may elect a libertarian-minded candidate in 2012. I certainly prefer libertarian-leaning candidates. I think the simple solution is less government and people make their own choices and that works best for everyone.

But we don’t want any full-bore libertarians.

I don’t know what it is, but when you go all the way down the libertarian path, it leads to complete insanity. Just look at Ron Paul followers — they’re pretend-to-be-Spock-and-bite-each-other crazy. The libertarian philosophy seems reasonable enough, but it somehow always leads to candidates who accidentally dye themselves blue or carry around a pet ferret named Gustav.

So anyway, let’s definitely get someone in 2012 sympathetic to libertarian ideals who is adamantly against fiscal irresponsibility and government expansion — and for individualism — but if any candidates start foaming at the mouth, screaming “FIAT MONEY!!!!!”, back away and don’t make eye contact. Still, pure libertarians have a place in the GOP, but they’re sort of like Murdoch to the Republican A-Team: They keep breaking him out of the insane asylum because he’s useful for certain situations, but they’re not going to put him in charge of anything. Or there will be much fool pitying.