Yes, Major?
We just received a communique from Star Fleet.
Well?
Um, you’re not going to believe this, Commander, but…
Let me tell him, Nerys.
Somebody tell me already!
Star Fleet just sent word of a mission change.
Well, this war with the Dominion is a rough fight. We’re going to have to make changes from time to time…
Sir, this change is … unsettling.
So, what’s the change. Are they moving the Defiant to another location? Are we not heading back into the Gamma Quadrant? A suicide mission to Cardassia Prime? What is it?
Nothing like that at all, Benjamin.
So, what is it, Old Man?
The Federation president has changed to the primary mission of Star Fleet to …
Yes?
Our primary mission …
Yes?
Sir, our primary mission is now … outreach to the Jem’Hadar.
What?!
Outreach to the Jem’Hadar, Benjamin.
Outreach to the Jem’Hadar? The very ones who have attacked us, killed us, fought for our destruction? That Jem’Hadar?
The Federation president says it will improve relationships by focusing on Jem’Hadar outreach instead of Star Fleet’s traditional role of exploring strange new worlds, seeking out new life and new civilizatons…
I’m familiar with our mission, Major.
Our former mission, Commander.
No, this isn’t right. There’s no way that the Federation president would issue such an order. The United Federation of Planets would never allow such stupidity from its president.
It’s true, Benjamin. We’ve confirmed it.
Well, we’ll begin making initial preparations for this, but I can’t believe it’ll stand. We’ll keep current mission plans in reserve, ready to revert to them when the Federation comes to its senses.
Yes, sir.
Why would the president do such an asinine thing?
I don’t know, Commander. But I imagine some in Section 31 will say it’s because his middle name is “Weyoun.”
He’s a Changeling!
Is the captain racist for questioning the order?
Pure brilliance. DS9 never got the recognition it deserves.
[Personally, I liked DS9 much better than TNG. Sisko could throw a baseball, after all. – B]
This plot is so far fetched and imposable it could never happen in real life….could it? It would be a complete insult to all of America especially those Americans who gave their lives for the exploration of space. This is obviously a cheap Hollywood plot cooked up by third rate hack writers….right?
I have voted many different ways in my lifetime. Come this November I will vote with vengeance.
Ahh Basil,
I just can’t catch up on DS9 from Memory Alpha.Too much intrigue and politics to absorb at once.
But, I trust that your analogy is of such inescapable
logic that even Kolinahr masters weep at the telling of it.
“his middle name is ‘Weyoun’.”
Priceless!
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This post is made of WIN.
And I, too, loved DS9 over all other Trek franchises.
Judging by his performance with the BP oil leak, if Obama had been president during the early days of Star Trek we would all be up to our butts in Tribbles.
Bravo Basil!
This black guy – their black guy – is a racist!
The US police force will now be in charge of…sponge-bathing the elderly. The fire department will be in charge of equal distribution of jello.
Great one, Basil !!! To qoute Kommander Obama…Set phasers on stupid !!!!
Wasn’t Deep space nine the floating shopping mall in space? Never got into that one.
[DS9 started slow, spending the first season and a half developing characters. In season 4, they added the missing ingredient, Worf — although a more prominent Garak could have sufficed. Anyway, it’s the best of the TNG-era shows (
IMHOIMAO). – B.]Excellent!
Deep Space Nine alone makes a five
At least it will be easy to teach the Warped ones how to fly the shuttle. They don’t need to learn how to land.
Absolutely hilarious. And I have to say I became a bigger fan of DS9 once the war started.
DS9 can suck a fat one!!!!! A cop show in space whoo hoo!!!
F U Rick Berman!
[Let me guess: you enjoyed Star Wars Episodes I, II, & III, right? You don’t have to pay attention to those. That’s awesome! – B]
Judging from the Above I take the nutrek film didn’t exactly thrill you Basil?
Not that I’m complaining, I didn’t care much for it.
[Oh, that. I forgot about that. Not that it was forgettable. I just … forgot about that. – B]
That makes sense on that show…after all, Whoopi Goldberg was the bartender, so apparently the place was full of liberal idiots.
[Guinan was bartender of Ten Forward on Star Trek: The Next Generation. Armin Shimerman played Quark, owner of the bar Quark’s on Deep Space Nine.
But, all that is not to say your comment about the show (or shows) being full of liberal idiots. You can’t swing a dead cat without hitting a liberal in Hollywood. Although, come to think of it, that might make for a fun reality show. – B]
HEY EVERYBODY,THE #1 CRITERIA IS DOES THE SHOW ENTERTAIN.FOR ME ,YES.I ENJOY SCI-FI,GREAT TO MIDLING SHOWS,MOVIES ETC.ANOTHER SHOWAT THE TIME WAS COMPETITOR BABYLON 5, WHICH I GOT INTO MOSTLY AS RERUNS IN ITS 5TH YEAR.I THOUGHT BOTH SHOWS WERE GREAT.THATS ALL THAT REALLY MATTERS.
[You know your Caps Lock key is stuck, right? – B.]
I’ll bet the Federation president wasn’t even born on planet Earth! Where is the birth hologram?!