I was just thinking, have you heard of a more cynical case of capitalism than the sale of Huffington Post? Here, you have a liberal site always going on about how great socialism is and how bad corporations are and then make $315 million off of thousands of unpaid bloggers who still don’t get a cut of the money. Anyway, something to keep in mind if you ever see another post on HuffPo about corporate greed or something. That’s the way it is with the left: The rules are always for other people.

Anyway, makes me think of some cynical ploys. Like maybe I could sell my whole online persona. I don’t know if anyone has done this before, but maybe someone could just buy out my whole online identity. They’d give me big cash money, and then I quietly hand over the password for my blog and Twitter account and they get to be Frank J. You guys wouldn’t notice anything different except, considering who bought me out, I might start talking up how great Chevy trucks are or something. This would work even better for someone completely anonymous like Allahpundit. Someone else could start being Allahpundit, and no one would ever know. Could have happened a few times already.

Anyway, I think it’s time to cash out. I’ll soon put up being Frank J. on eBay. Bidding starts at a million.

So Biden announced a $53 billion plan to build high speed rail. He said this is about “seizing the future.” So, I guess we already gave up on winning the future and are going to do a snatch and grab on it.

Of course, how are we going to get to the future using a strategy from the second half of the 19th century?

BIDEN: “Let’s build trains!”

AMERICA: “No one uses trains anymore.”

BIDEN: “But these are really fast trains?”

AMERICA: “Faster than planes?”

BIDEN: “No.”

Yeah, let’s definitely spend those billions we don’t have to make choo choos, ’cause if one thing is holding back our economy it’s not enough choo choos. And after we use our advanced technology to build a better train, let’s then focus science on inventing a better horseshoe.

Of course, if we all want to be about saving money and being green and what not, shouldn’t we focus more on not going places since we have like our internet and stuff now. I mean, physically going places seems so last century. You didn’t have to go any place to get IMAO; why even go outside at all, I say.

So Obama has been pretty good at coming up with slogans like “The Audacity of Hope”, “Yes We Can”, and “Win the Future.” They’re short, meaningless, and fun to say. In 2012, he’s probably going to need more than those if he hopes to win reelection, so I thought I’d try my hand and coming up with a number of new happy, meaningless slogans for him to try out. If he likes them, he can buy them for a million dollars.

NEW POSSIBLE SLOGANS FOR OBAMA

“Yes We Are”

“Bitterly Cling to Progress”

“Forward to Something”

“The Time Is Now. The Future Is Forward. The Sky Is Up. The Space Needle Is in Seattle.”

“We’re the People That Are Here Now”

“Eat. Pray. Pay Taxes.”

“When a car is stuck in a ditch, we can either be the car or the ditch. Let’s be the ditch.”

“We Need to Do Stuff About the Things”

“The Audacity of Unicorns”

“Let’s not concentrate on a past filled with dinosaurs, but a future filled with resurrected dinosaurs.”

On second, thought, that last one is not for sale.