So everyone was waiting on Obama’s new budget, and here it is: $7.2 trillion in new debt over the next ten years. Obama is not even trying anymore. He’s practically admitting the big issues of the day are to much for him and he’s not even go to attempt to do anything about them. Is he going to resign and find a job more at his level like news anchor? I don’t know, but it seems probable.
Anyway, I guess it’s up to me to save America once again and come up with how to cut the budget. First off, we need to across the board cuts — like everything needs to be cut 10%, doesn’t matter what it is. Nothing is off the table. Of course, people are going to whine and scream about these cuts and the Democrats are going to try and turn that into political capital rather than help save the country, so here’s where my genius comes in: We find someone to blame the cuts on.
Basically, the president (whoever that is after Obama resigns and Biden gets stuck in well), will say, “I really don’t want to have to cut Social Security and Medicare, but these budget demands came straight from corporate– Know what? Screw that! I’m marching right to corporate and demanding they don’t cut these programs!” Then a day later the president will come back and say, “I’m sorry, but those bastards in corporate just won’t budge. I tried to explain to them how much these cuts will hurt the average American, but they didn’t care. It’s all about the bottom line to them. Just know I fought hard for you, though.” Then the president will look up and shake his fist and scream, “Corporate!”
Now, all we need to do is make sure know one asks too many questions on who this corporate is and where they are, so let’s make sure only professional journalists get to ask questions. And then finally we get those needed harsh cuts and it’s none of our faults; it’s those heartless bastards in corporate. It’s like they have no idea what things are like for the average American; I hate those guys.
Maybe Alec Baldwin could help Obama with this by coming in and blaming it on Mitch and Murray.
That’s all well and good, Frank, but you know what will happen next. Corporate will send down a 3 page memo about the dress code for casual Friday. On the positive side, we’ll reduce the deficit. On the other hand, the guys will be giving up their jeans for chinos on Fridays.
“Obama is not even trying anymore. ”
He’s not only “trying,” he’s succeeding. See, you’re still under the impression his goal is to help America, and that he actually cares what Americans think. No, his goal to bring down the evil America and usher us into George Soros’ “world government” is working out just fine.
I can’t joke about something this depressing. I can hardly think about it.
Can we get Corporate to fire those idiots in the Washington branch?
Corporate is people! It’s people…
I think this company needs to have little bits of it sold off to pay for corporates past mismanagement.
Like selling off the useless parts of commiefornistan like la, and scumfransicko to the chinese. we could sell ore gone to the canadians, cause canadians would like someone dumber than they are. We could sell new yank to greenland or maybe the martians. We can write off detroit, minnesota, and ohio to be used as the dump for the rest of the country. then use nevada as a nuclear waste disposal site, because without the enviro whackos of commiefornistan, we will actually get to be energy independant. The budget will take care of itself because we will have disposed of most of the parasites an eliminated debt in the process. Yay Real united STATES!
Frank! dude, your moderator is killing me! I feel like the evil monkey is biting me.
10% cuts to everything? Frank, you’re thinking too small. I propose ~%35 cuts, or whatever it would take to have no deficit for the year.
And then, cut it some more so we can start paying off this ridiculous debt.
This one is easy. Elimanate all social spendong, then, tax the rest of the world. We have bailed thier butts out enough, niw it’s our turn. Let France and Chile and Cambodia dea with the IRS. That’ll teach ’em. Then we will have enough money for rocket mounted dinosaurs.
If people don’t believe there’s a “corporate” that the President answers to, just say it’s Haliburton. Moonbats believed it for 8 years, so maybe they’ll still believe it now.
Plentyobailouts – Frank tried to get your comments approved, but Corporate wouldn’t let him.
Can government employees who provide healthcare for the troops but make less then 30k a year be exempt? Am I asking too much for myself?
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again…shut down our bases in Europe. For example…why do we still need to station 65,000 troops in Germany? Why do we need 13,000 in Italy and 12,000 in England? Isn’t it about time these people learned to take care of themselves?
zzyzx, remember, they are european. So the answer is no.
We’ve already done this to pass the stimulus. “We must pass the stimulus to save the ‘financial sector’ or we’ll have a catastrophic ‘financial meltdown'”. Just replace stimulus with 10% across the board cuts.
They should also look at cutting salaries of government workers. NO government worker should be making more than their counterpart in the private sector. After all, if dealing with them makes you want to hurt someone, that’s not government service…………..it’s government disservice.
After “the ones” job performance the Democrats should be paying us just to keep the incompetent, doofus in office.