So there’s this budget debate and a looming shutdown, and I just find it hard to care about. We have Paul Ryan’s new budget to cut trillions, but they’re arguing over less than a hundred billion. It’s like let’s just skip this and get straight to the entitlements and hope we can come up with some plan to pay things down in fifty years or so.

Man, things are just so messed up in this country right now; sometimes it doesn’t seem like we’ll ever get right again. If we kept up the momentum for the eighties — the Reagan years — right now we’d be flying around in rocket cars, polishing our large stacks of gold, having parades for our dino warriors, and updating our maps to remove all the evil countries we destroyed. Instead, we’re just trying to scrounge enough money to keep our horrible government going for a few more months. We’re just really sucking it up right now; I blame liberals, RINOs, and fat kids. And the Founding Fathers.

I mean, obviously if we got from their Constitution to what we have today, they made a bunch of mistakes. We now have this entrenched political class full of useless morons who want to boss us around and spend all our money, and obviously the Constitution didn’t prevent that well enough. I’m not even sure we can fix it; we’ll probably have to wait for the government to collapse under its own weight and then learn from our mistakes when we make a Constitution for our new country. Like now it’s pretty obvious that half the Constitution should be devoted to strict limits on how much money the government should take and for what purposes. And maybe the other half on the severe punishments that we’ll inflict on politicians if they’re even slightly crooked. And perhaps we should try to come up with some way to make sure the politicians we put in charge aren’t all sociopath morons, but that doesn’t matter too much if we just limit their power. Oh, and we definitely want to redo the Supreme Court — instead of a bunch of weirdo judges trying to look for hidden meanings in the Constitution, we do it more like jury duty where we grab a few regular people and ask them if a bill matches what’s allowed in the plain meaning of the Constitution. And fat kids should be unconstitutional.

What do you want in the new Constitution?