Michelle Obama, ‘My Next Vacation Will Be In Outer Space’
[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]
Archive of entries posted on 3rd April 2012
lolbama! Part 86
NOTE: I could use some more lolterizt entries. Here’s last week’s pic, but you’re perfectly free to use something else:
This week, That One. Next week, terrorists. Submit for either at lolterizt@gmail.com
Meanwhile, pass ’em around, spread the love, and if you make your own, don’t be shy about dropping a link to your pics in the comments. The more, the merrier.
NOTE TO READERS: Hovering your mouse over the picture activates closed captioning for the l33t-speak/txtmsg impaired.
From Arik:
From Arik:
From Guns:
From James:
[reference link]
From Kris:
[reference link]
From Kris:
From Lane:
[reference link]
From Lane:
[reference link]
From Lane:
From Lane:
[reference link]
From Travelwise42:
My favorites from the submissions using last edition’s uncaptioned picture:
From Les of Brick Moon:
[reference link]
From Les of Brick Moon:
[reference link]
From Travelwise42:
From VelvetElvis:
BONUS LINKS:
Obama’s Accomplishments
New Obama movie: “The Crisis-Maker”
This week’s uncaptioned picture for you to play with:
That’s Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano.
BONUS CHALLENGE: caption without using the word “Hitler” or “Nazi”.
Lane for being well-versed in Cthulhu Mythos and for having actually seen “Transformers: The Movie”
Honorable mention to James for knowing his Python TV show. And the name of the French National Anthem.
Also to Les for knowing his Old Testament.
What say you?
PRODUCTION NOTES:
#1: When creating lolbama! pictures, please caption with either black or white text, as colors like red and yellow tend to blur badly when I compress the images.
#2: Standard image size for these posts is 350px wide by whatever high. If you can have your images 350px wide before you caption them, I won’t end up shrinking your captions into illegibility when I re-size the images.
MAKE YOUR OWN: The free lolbuilder from I Can Has Cheezburger.
STYLE NOTE: Short captions are usually better. Your goal is 10 words or less, with humor value tending to increase exponentially as the number of words approaches 1.
Send your submissions to lolterizt@gmail.com and – if they aren’t obscene (IMAO is a PG-13 site) and don’t suck too terribly bad – I’ll post them for you. Remember to include your name (and blog URL, if applicable) so I know who to thank.
NBC Apologizes for Editing Zimmerman Call
NEW YORK CITY (AP) – NBC has revealed that it is launching an internal investigation into the “editing process” surrounding its broadcast of the conversation between George Zimmerman and a police 911 dispatcher, where Zimmerman appeared to volunteer racial information.
NBC played the conversation on the “Today Show” as: “This guy looks like he’s up to no good. He looks black.”
However, the unedited clip from the 911 call was as follows:
Zimmerman: This guy looks like he’s up to no good. Or he’s on drugs or something. It’s raining and he’s just walking around, looking about.
Dispatcher: OK, and this guy – is he black, white or Hispanic?
Zimmerman: He looks black.
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At a press conference Monday, “Today” show executive producer Jim Bell apologized for the error, saying “it does not represent the high journalistic standards of the ‘Today’ show.”
After awkwardly fumbling with his notecards for a few moments, he added thoughtfully, “why not try a holiday in Sweden this year? See the lovely lakes, the wonderful telephone system, and many interesting furry animals. Including the majestic moose. A moose once bit my sister…”
At this point, NBC News Senior Vice President Cheryl Gould shoved Bell off the stage and announced, “we apologize for the fault in this press conference. Those responsible have been sacked.”
Within seconds, Bell had clambered back onto the stage and grabbed the microphone while shouting, “mind you, moose bites can be pretty nasty…”
Attempting to regain control of the situation, NBC News President Steve Capus shoved both Gould and Bell off the stage, declaring, “we apologize again for the fault in this press conference. Those responsible for sacking the people who have just been sacked have been sacked.”
The press conference ended abruptly in complete disarray when it was suddenly invaded by Vikings chanting about either spicy canned meat or unsolicited commercial email.
No moose were harmed during the event.
Nuke the News: There Are Three Branches of Government?!
* Obama suddenly seems super confused by the existence of the Supreme Court. “The Supreme Court could strike down a law? That’s unprecedented!” And supposedly Obama was once a constitutional law professor… or maybe people are just saying that about him to make fun of him. I don’t know; apparently his attitude is, “I got this law through two out of three branches already — that’s a super majority of branches of government — why do I need to do anything else?” Sometimes it seems like the average tourist knows more about the American system of government than the left does.
Do you think Obama would pass a citizenship test? I mean for this country.
* And some on the left are trying to claim that if the Supreme Court struck down Obamacare, it would be “judicial activism.” Judicial activism is another one of those really simple concepts that the left pretends is really complicated. Judicial activism just means making stuff up that isn’t in the Constitution to either strike down a constitutional law or uphold an unconstitutional law. It’s a means of changing the Constitution without having to go through that pesky amendment process.
Judicial activism in the Obamacare case would be judges saying that the federal government can force people to buy stuff when clearly that’s not one of the powers given in the Constitution. If people want that, they need to pass an amendment — which they know they can’t because it’s idiotic. Get a clue, people.
* You expect idiots to uselessly go after guns in the wake of the Trayvon shooting, but they’re also moronically going after neighborhood watches. Of the countless black youths killed by gun violence, what percentage of that is from neighborhood watches? Like 0.001%? So if you actually cared about black youths being shot and aren’t just a useless political slug, would you waste anytime writing legislation about neighborhood watches? But these people don’t care; they’re just twits who want attention. Why do they pull a salary for this?
* Obama struck out against claims he doesn’t believe in American exceptionalism. “I want America to best any other country out there in being like Europe. By the way, look at me; I’m not wearing a flag pin because they’re stupid.”
* Wisdom of the Day from Michael J. Nelson:
I hope they do give human rights to cetaceans because there are some psycho rapist dolphins out there that I can’t wait to see behind bars.
* Saw this headline: “Human ancestors used fire earlier than thought, study says”. Doesn’t sound like man would have survived if they learned how to use fire before they learned how to think.
Random Thoughts
Obama: “I thought you only had to get your law by two out of three branches of government.”
I just got my first royalty check in the mail. It does make me feel like a king.
Thanks to smartphone check depositing, I can both cash my royalty check and keep it for later framing.
Saying the government can make a us buy stuff would be judicial activism. You want that, pass an amendment.