[High Praise! to John]
Not the new movie, of course, which will be a cringe-worthy bucket of awful, but a defense of the critters as superheroes. Such defense made necessary by a cruel and thoughtless review penned by Roger Ebert quite some time ago in which he checked his professionalism at the door and attacked the characters instead of the movie.
The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Vs. The Evil Roger Ebert
Be warned, it’s got a fair sprinkling of adult language, but it’s just ever so much fun watching Ebert take one in the teeth.
Right off the bat, Ebert claims that “A recent national survey reported that 95 percent of grade school teachers could trace aggressive, antisocial classroom behavior to the Ninja Turtles…”. This is nothing more than the standard, recycled nonsense about a various work of art or entertainment corrupting young minds and turning kindergartners into skull-cracking rape machines. In what publication did he find that highly scientific and unbiased survey? Liberal Guilt Quarterly? Or maybe from the scholastic journal of Bored Housewife Who Wants to Feel Important So She Dusts Off the Cliffnotes From Her Community College Psychology Class And Half-Ass Analyzes Her Eight-Year-Old Son? Probably that one. They’re known for their hard-hitting investigative journalism.
Much, much more at the link.
[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]
I never could understand those ninja turtle mutant thingy’s but if Ebert doesn’t like ’em, then I’m all for ’em – whatever they are/do.
I remember the spattering of rip-off/parodies of the Ninja turtles that littered the comic book stores for a while, like Adolescent Radioactive Kung-fu Hamsters.
So as bad as the turtle movies were, they could have been worse.
“Skull-cracking rape machines”? That describes most children, regardless of any influence by the TMNT. I’m not sure where these (public) “grade school teachers” get off thinking that children are all perfectly well-behaved, peace loving angels. Most of them are little monsters who then grow up to be bigger monsters, unless they live in the increasingly rare home with parents that practice discipline.