Did you miss me?  I didn’t think so.  Been trapped in DC at an FDA conference.  Seemed like years, but I’m pretty sure it was only a week.  But the two major items of interest from the conference are first, of course, because of current interpretations of regulations by bureaucrats, drugs will be more difficult to bring to market and they will necessarily be more expensive without adding any real value in the process.  No surprise there. Been trending that way for years. 

But here is the part that I thought was interesting.  As I sat at the conference, I was struck by the lack of diversity among the attendees and the FDA presenters.  Among the presenters, there were only white folks, and among the attendees there were just us honkies and a smattering of Asians and Indians.  The only black people to be seen were the ones serving us meals.  I was shocked to discover in Obama’s post racial America, attending a government sponsored conference was like going back to the plantation.  Clearly something must be done to bring diversity both to the FDA and the pharmaceutical industry.  This sounds like a job for government.  Here is what I am proposing to Senator Hatch.

• Legalize all illicit drugs and bring their regulation under the auspices of FDA.
• If you want to get a new drug approved, the last step in the process is a slam dunk competition between FDA and drug company employees.
• Develop the technology to deliver drugs to the patient in fried chicken and watermelon. (Can someone explain to me why chicken and watermelon are racist?  I love chicken and watermelon, and I’m as pasty white as they come).
• A government subsidized deadbeat dad drug discount program.
• Send aggressive FDA recruiters to Methadone clinics.
• Require that all pharmaceutical prescribing information and labeling be written in English, Spanish and Ebonics.
• Incentivize and facilitate entry into the drug trade by expanding the Fast and Furious program to the inner cities.
• Expand the prescription drug coverage under Obamacare to include recreational use.
• Require drug companies to give free samples to all FDA inspectors.
• FDA will be giving away free spears for the first 1,000 resumes.
• Eliminate all informed consent requirements, and rewrite all animal and human clinical protocol guidances to consolidate all pharmaceutical testing under the new pilot approach known as: Try it Out on Whitey. 

Any other ideas?