Thankfully, Obama has left the country for a while and visited Berlin. Here are some tidbits about his trip to Germany that I bet you haven’t read in the mainstream media. You can thank my man in State for these, as usual.
- Obama began his speech by claiming to be a jelly donut. He was speaking English.
- He kept referring to himself as the First Black Fuhrer.
- He apologized to Germany for America’s role in causing WWI and WWII.
- He boldly stood up and suggested that Mr. Putin rebuild that wall.
- He asked Angela Merkel if she would give him a quick peak behind her iron curtain.
- He tried to defect to East Germany, but was unable to since he couldn’t locate it with his GPS.
- As an act of goodwill, he promised the German people that America would return the ark to them.
- As he was approaching the podium, he had the band play, “Springtime for Hitler.”
- While visiting the death camps, he asked the tour guides for schematics and design specifics, ‘just in case.’
- Everywhere he went, he kept dropping little handwritten notes that said, “The Jews really are controlling me. Help.”
- Also whenever he visited the death camps, he kept making the same old inappropriate comment: “I always like to look for the good in any situation. I bet somewhere in all those mass graves there was a necrophiliac playing dead and just having the time of his life.”
» Brought along the shotgun he uses all the time at Camp David hoping to get in some schnauzer hunting.
» He said he’d heard the hunting was especially good in the “African-American Forest” region.
… Proposed a new motto for the IRS:
“Our Bite Macht Frei”
… Had the NSA hack Schindler’s contact list.
There has never been a cruller President.
WWII’s Admiral Donuts would’ve loved him.
When visiting the Bergen-Belsen death camp Obama was impressed when told that they used natural gas, saying they must’ve been one of the first national green-energy projects.
When visiting the death camps Obama asked where they set up the pup tents, did they get to make s’mores, and at the end of the week, did they get a souvenir t-shirt.
Before his meeting with Angela Merkel, the Secret Service had to dissuade Obama from greeting her while wearing lederhosen and shooting his right arm out, palm down.
He mentioned that Anne Frank “Would have enjoyed an Obamaphone.”
#7, and he said that Anne Frank would have liked him more than that Justin Bieber too.
One of the biggest atrocities committed by Germany was not keeping Obama, but letting him come back to the U.S.
They could have made up for a lot if they had kept him.