Straight Line of the Day: Obama Plans to “Reboot” His Presidency After the Elections by…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

Obama plans to “reboot” his presidency after the elections by…

44 Comments

  1. … officially putting Valerie Jarret in change while he plays golf 24/7.

    … turning off the American people but forgetting to turn them back on.

    … reinstalling Microsoft Bob.

    … deciding his second term will go on until further notice. (None of those pesky Presidential Elections)

  2. Say to the American people, “Let me be clear. I don’t feel no ways tired. I come too far from where I started from. Nobody told me that the road would be easy. I don’t believe He brought me this far.”

  3. Obama plans to “reboot” his presidency after the elections by…

    finally just flushing that pesky old Constitution down the toilet for once and for all.

    throwing the MSM out after their failure to properly glorify him.

    having the actual rebooting done by the same people who made the Obamacare website such a success.

    putting all his records on Government Hard drives, just in case.

    seeing if using Biden in blackface will give him more free time for golf.

    doing the same things he did before, but just calling it something different.

  4. . . . inserting a 5 1/4″ floppy disk into an opening intended for a 3 1/2″ floppy disk (Hey, it will work as well as anything else that he’s done.)

    . . . having Joe Biden polish boots

    . . . booting after eating one of Michelle’s school lunches

  5. …by invoking his Obamacare right to a sex change operation and insisting everyone call him Beatrice Obama so that she can be eligible for another 8 years.

    …by fundamentally transforming everything he’s fundamentally transformed so that he can continue to stick it to the man.

    …by insisting he learned about the reboot in the news just like the rest of us.

  6. …this time he is BaClark Okento, black,gay reporter for the Daily Worker, and his alter ego, Mildly Liberal Person.

    …being a lot less Lawless and much more Lucy.

    …no whites, more weed and wine and Executive Orders to sign.

    …out with Empty Suit Guy, he’s now Straw Man, the scarecrow in the nice suit, scaring folks.

  7. Obama plans to “reboot” his presidency after the elections by… renouncing his membership in the Democrat Party and registering as an Independent…. that way EVERYONE can hate him without those pesky party lines….

  8. …having Obamacare cover mandatory electroshock therapy. -And it will continue until nobody remembers the last six years.

    …promising free Anonymiss cookies to everyone if they start liking him again, then blaming Republicans when it turns out the cookies are actually store-bought and contain walnuts.

  9. … Buying new ‘golfing’ boots, guaranteed to improve your game by three strokes or more.

    … Hoping people will misread that as ‘robot’ and hold out for a cyborg president.

    … By blaming Bush. (That’s new right?)

  10. …by calling himself Bonan the Rebooter.

    …with pithy responses like “I know you am but what are I?”

    …first he has to get bitten by radioactive “Ebolee” virus ridden sewer rat to become Spewerman, much as he is now but wearing a cool cape.

  11. …admitting he misspoke before, there are actually 87 states and the Dems still rule the Senate.

    …channelling his inner Ian Dury again but this time emphasizing the new boots.

    …openly and proudly ordering a daylight raid on Nancy Sinatra”s closet.

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