Straight Line of the Day: Signs That Hillary Clinton May Have Alzheimer’s Include…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

Signs that Hillary Clinton may have Alzheimer’s include…

19 Comments

  1. …. she looks at Bill with those “longing” eyes, not those “laser death” eyes….. must be the Oldtimer’s because there is no way Hillary would let Bill keep breathing after all he’s done. I mean, she is the “women’s champion” after all. All victims “must be heard”, right? Never mind those hussies that obviously seduced her man and then lied about it….. nobody needs to hear them……

  2. Signs that Hillary Clinton may have Alzheimer’s include…

    Stuff you simply can’t make up that is funnier than the truth.

    Hillary Clinton stated that Sanders is “the only one of this stage that voted to deregulate the financial market in 2000. . .which [was] one of the main causes of the collapse in ’08.”

    Sanders, of course, was the only one of the stage who could have voted to deregulate in 2000. Neither Clinton nor Martin O’Malley served in Congress at that time.

    But this fact doesn’t render Hillary’s shot unfair, at least by current standards. I imagine that most presidential candidates would be willing to make such an argument if put on the defensive.

    Consider this, however. Bill Clinton signed into law the very act — The Commodity Futures Modernization Act of 2000 — that Hillary attacked Sanders for supporting.

  3. Signs that Hillary Clinton may have Alzheimer’s include…

    She keeps insisting that there was a duplicate key.

    calls everyone “Pookie”.

    Demands that people stop rearranging the furniture.

  4. …she has cranial plaque oozing from her nostrils.

    …slurred speech even without the Scotch.

    …weakness in her thighs (it’s one of the main symptoms, trust me).

    …babies aren’t looking good for breakfast anymore.

  5. …she loses count putting her first pants leg on.

    …has started giving away her influence to do harm to America.

    …Huma has to frequently explain that Hillary isn’t twerking, she’s just trying to wipe her butt.

    …those giggling fits she has thinking about who has had killed include David Bowie and Glenn Frey.

    …the diagnosis being her best, if only chance of not being indicted.

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