And you may find yourself
Living in a shotgun shack
And you may find yourself
In another part of the world
And you may find yourself
Behind the wheel of a large automobile
And you may find yourself in a beautiful house
With a beautiful wife
And you may ask yourself, well
How did I get here?
“Where’s Hunter?”
“Just because you don’t understand the words your speechwriters wrote, doesn’t mean you’re speaking in tongues.”
Just because he’s 77, doesn’t mean Joe Biden doesn’t keep up with modern trends. Here he demonstrates how to “Vogue.”
“It’s Good!”
I pooped this morning!
It was this big!
When you kissed Obama’s A**, how big was it? The A** that is.
Marcel Marceau was not impressed.
“Come on, man! It was a classic scene from Sleeper!
Can you imagine seeing a great big boob on your screen?”
“It’s Fun To Stay at the Y Am I Here?”
That was the Indian, right?
Faux.
So it was Liz then.
“This is my invisible beach ball. Took me all morning to blow it up.”
I came THIS CLOSE to walking into traffic today!
“It’s the big one ‘Lizbeth!”
“That darn Beto!”
“Where are you Tammy Faye!”
“Remember what the good book says!”
“CON!!!!!!!!!!!!”
And you may find yourself
Living in a shotgun shack
And you may find yourself
In another part of the world
And you may find yourself
Behind the wheel of a large automobile
And you may find yourself in a beautiful house
With a beautiful wife
And you may ask yourself, well
How did I get here?
Stop making sense.
Just can’t face up to the facts.
“As God is my witness, they fired me when they found out I was a pregnant Indian.”
Aaaaand I thought Turkeys could fly.
“Hey! Can someone please toss me down my upper denture??”
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This is what it looked like when I showed Corn Pop how to breakdance.
So like I told Scott Norwood, It’s up! It’s Good!
And then Michelle said “Excuse me while I whip this out.”