Some artists only have one really big hit. Jeannine Deckers, AKA Sœur Sourire, AKA The Singing Nun, took a French song to the top of the charts in 1963. Her life didn’t go a rainbows and unicorns after that. She was hounded for taxes for monies she never received, and ended up killing herself a couple of decades later.
What’s been on your mind? Got something you’d like to share? A topic to discuss? It’s Wednesday Night Open Thread.
Who wants to start?
This is a reposting of one of Harvey’s classics. There’s a link to the book in the sidebar. — The Editors
Welcome to Fun Facts About the 50 States, where – week by week – I’ll be taking you on a tour around this great nation of ours, providing you with interesting, yet completely useless and probably untrue, information about each of the 50 states.
This week, we’ll be going to the only state that serves maple syrup at communion services as we visit Vermont. So let’s get started…
That wraps up the Vermont edition of Fun Facts About the 50 States. Next week we’ll be surrounded by bleached blond surfers who say “dude!” with a southern accent as we visit Virginia.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve gotta go get paid for my “No Blood For Oil! Exxon Takes VISA!” sign.
[The complete e-book version of “Fun Facts About the 50 States” is now available at Amazon.com. If you don’t have a Kindle, you can download free Kindle apps for your web browser, smartphone, computer, or tablet from Amazon.com]
Works like this: We feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit us with a punch line in the comments.
Sports Illustrated has their most diverse swimsuit model class ever. But not every group is represented. Most notably missing is…
So how is Bill Kristol prepping to campaign for Bernie Sanders?
When I write a large code change and it compiles the first time, it always creeps me out.
DEMOCRATS: “Give up your AR-15s; it’s ridiculous you’d ever need them to fight tyranny. BTW, we’ve decided to go full Communist.”
You know how old Bernie Sanders is? The shock of winning could kill him.
So much money is spent in presidential elections because people want a very specific terrible idiot and can’t just be happy with the terrible idiot everyone else decides on.
Isn’t the first level of Battletoads one of the greatest lies in human history?
“What a fun, slightly challenging game! I can’t wait for many more levels like this!”
Remember: 2020 will be the least important presidential election of your life time.
I’m glad I didn’t have to jettison all my principles to either support or oppose Trump. All my principles are still safe in a box somewhere in my closet, I think.
I pledge to not support the Democratic nominee whoever he or she is.
I also pledge to not support the Republican nominee.
Why do we pretend picking between two terrible choices is ever going to fix anything?
I really like the Babylon Bee podcast. I feel like I pay much more attention to a podcast when they sometimes mention me.
If you’re looking for the most entertainment out of the presidential election–and I don’t know what else you’d expect from it–the best outcome will be billionaire Bloomberg beating Bernie (hilarious!) followed by months of short jokes from Trump.
Inequality is the idea you can never be happy with a million dollars if the guy next door has a billion.
And it’s the other guy that’s greedy.
The #NeverTrump symbol is about to become a hammer and sickle.
My prediction for the 2020 presidential election: Fun!
I don’t really want to be involved in a campaign, but I’ll write short jokes about Bloomberg for a fee. Not even a big one.
Trump hiring terrible people he later has to fire for being terrible is part of his 8D Chutes & Ladders.
When you hit the recline button on your airline seat, it puts an invisible dust on your fingers that can be seen through black light to help police secretly identify sociopaths.
The least way a citizen influences his country is his vote.
Trump will win if people realize he’s the only thing standing between us and worse than Trump.
“Trump is a special threat to our country! Who is the other choice?”
“A Communist!”
“Oh… well… uh…”
“But he’s like senile, so he probably can’t do much harm.”
“Oh! Cool!”
I like it how when a movie is going for a Stranger Things vibe, they just go ahead and hire Finn Wolfhard.
It’s very cynical to make fun of my viewpoints which are all extremely important and well thought out.
Late stage capitalism? We’ve only utilized like 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001% of the capital in the universe. We’ve barely started.
I’m not going to see the Sonic movie because it would be a betrayal to the 12yo me Super Nintendo loyalist.
The Rage Against the Machine ticket prices is just a reminder of what I keep saying: No one is actually against capitalism.
If when you say “socialism,” you just mean “more welfare programs,” then just say, “I want more welfare programs.” Stop invoking the name of a philosophy that killed 100 million people last century, you stupid little idiots.
What’s confusing is that so many of these dummies talk about capitalism like they want to get rid of it, but the type of “socialism” that’s just more welfare programs can only exist with the wealth of capitalism. A parasite can’t live without a host.
If anyone was actually trying to get rid of capitalism, I’d hope anyone with any concern for their fellow man would pick up an AR-15 and fight back. Worldwide, the death of capitalism would starve billions.
But no one actually wants to get rid of capitalism. There’s just a bunch of over-privileged whiny people who like to sound important.
Oh man, it would be so hilarious if billionaire Bloomberg ended up narrowly beating Bernie for the nomination. The ensuing freak out that would overtake the Democratic Party would be like nothing I’ve ever seen in my life.
So does Billie Eilish have concerts in large venues or does she just do performances to one person at a time and whispers they lyrics to them?
Here’s how my brain works: I know nothing about Billy Eyelash, but I saw a couple tweets that were like “to all the haters who say she just ‘whispers’…” so I was like “I should make fun of how all she does is whisper.”
I really liked The Babylon Bee until I started writing for it and it got all political.
I did not realize Bloomberg is as old as Bernie.
It’s not right when South Park makes fun of things I think are super duper important. It should only make fun of things other people think are super duper important because they are wrong.
Does it give Bernie supporters any pause that Bernie is an avowed socialist or that Bill de Blasio likes him?
Man, gas has been cheap for awhile… prolly because of Trump’s superior presidenting.
Just saw the stuff about Bloomberg and women; he makes Trump look like a feminist. Does that guy have one redeeming quality?
Oh yeah. Billions of dollars.
Liberty is always getting in the way of everybody’s plans.
That’s a feature, not a bug.
Just disable the seat recline in coach. Why even give psychopaths the option?
Whenever I hand over Winchester to SarahK, Winchester immediately turns around and gives me a big smile like, “Ha! I finally got who I wanted, loser!”
I guess the logic of running Bloomberg against Bernie is that even the absolute worst person in the country who isn’t a socialist is still better than a socialist.
Don’t Bernie Bros have a right to be angry?
I mean, sure, they tend to be over-privileged white people who have never face a real problem in their lives, but the pointlessness and uselessness of their existence gives them angst.
Now that Bloomberg has pointed out that Bernie supporters are basically Nazis, the question is will they be thankful for the constructive criticism or become violent and angry as is their nature?
It’s Presidents Day, the day you’re legally obligated to say something nice about the president.
Considering that Trump’s run for president was just a marketing stunt to get another season of The Apprentice, I think he’s done okay.
Is Steyer still in it in case people want a less obnoxious billionaire?
HARRISON FORD: “I’ll be in your movie, but you aren’t putting any mangy dog anywhere near me!”
DISNEY: “Fine. We’ll add the dog in post.”
If Bloomberg wins, that will prove you can buy a Democratic primary.
I don’t think you can buy the general election, though. Remember how much money was spent trying to convince people to be happy to vote for Hillary?
In the old trilogy, you just understood who the Empire was and how they were in charge of everything. In the new ones, I never had the slightest idea what the scope of the New Order was.
Death Star blows up
“The Empire’s new weapon is destroyed, but they’re still out there.”
Starkiller base blows up
“Does that mean the New Order is done for? Was that all of them? I have no idea.”
“And why are the good guys the ‘Resistance’? Aren’t they in charge now? Didn’t they see the end of Return of the Jedi?”
I’ll never for the life of me understand caring about billionaires. Don’t you have any real problems to focus on rather than spend time pretending that someone somewhere having a billion dollars is hurting you for vague reasons?
The Democratic debate today better be bloodsport.
Politics is so much fun lately. I don’t even know what I’m supposed to do as a satirist. It’s all “Look at these things that are actually happening; aren’t they wacky?”
According to something I read on the Internet — so you know it must be true — there are currently ten plagues going on. Really. The article lists them as:
Some of these could be combined into others. All the flu strains, for example. The weather and floods could be combined. Maybe earthquakes and volcanic eruptions. Maybe.
So, that’s down to four, at least. And four plagues is a pretty good amount.
These virus and such can take care of the first vial, right?
The earthquakes and volcanos can release gasses trapped in the bottom of the ocean, which will kill a bunch of sea life. That’s the second vial, right?
You see where this is going. So, what do you think? Should we worry? Or just hope it comes quickly? I’m torn.
