When the government hunts down and executes COVID-19 conspiracy theorists, they count that as deaths from COVID-19.

What Bernie Sanders achieved with his campaign was to prove his success in 2016 was just because people hated Hillary so much.

Once again, Bernie Bros, it’s time for you to admit that the Democratic establishment is smarter and better than you. Do not rebel against them in any way; that would destroy them.

If you put a bunch of hopes onto a politician, you deserve to be very disappointed.

People, calm down. They’re all terrible candidates with terrible ideas, and if you got excited for any of them, you’re dumb and everything that’s wrong with this country.

I’m still so surprised Disney+ didn’t have at least one of the Marvel series ready for launch. All they’ve had for original programming is the Mandalorian and a bunch of other shows no one finds worth talking about.

I was trying to explain silent movies to my kids, and I realized it didn’t make any sense to me. They had a phonograph at the time; why not just sync that up? It would take finesse, like syncing a RiffTrax with a DVD, but you assume people would hack it.
So it doesn’t make any sense. Thus, I don’t believe in silent movies.

I’m curious how many people will get this: What’s a similarity between Alien 3 and the 2nd made for TV Ewok movie (Ewoks: The Battle for Endor)?
The answer I’m looking for is both completely nullify the achievements of the previous movie (“I need to save Newt!” “We need to save our parents!”) by opening by killing off the people who the previous movie was about saving.
Maybe there are other sequels that are examples of that, but Alien 3 and Ewoks: The Battle For Endor are the only examples I know.

void Sleep(
DWORD dwMilliseconds
);
A function for magically fixing asynchronous issues.

When seeking treatment for depression, you can help move things along by disclosing ahead of time if you are the great clown Pagliacci.

Took a bit of suspension of belief for Brooklyn 99 this week as it was supposed to take place this April, but they were talking about things other than coronavirus.

My daughter was filling in her own history timeline and put coronavirus for 2020.
“That’s definitely the biggest thing for this year.”
Oh, man, I hope that’s true.

Training a baby is very easy if you are a good parent. I just tell my baby what things I don’t want him to touch and he studiously avoids them because he respects me.
It’s the same with my older children. Once, one of them whined and I told him, “I do not care for that. Never do that again.”
And he said, “Yes, father,” and never whined again. If you are a good parent, children will respect you.

RE: OANN, I don’t get needing a more right-wing alternative to FOX News, but people also want more left-wing alternatives to CNN and NBC News, so I guess there’s a market.

I guess my favorite Bible verse going from how often I quote it is “Am I my brother’s keeper?” I use some variation of that anytime someone asks me where something is.
“Where’s the baby?”
“Am I the baby’s keeper?”
“Yes!”

I love Trump’s “like a dog” formulation.
“He was thrown out LIKE A DOG!”
“He was fired LIKE A DOG!”
“He failed to account for a variety of complex factors when formulating his model LIKE A DOG!”

Many think the NYT is often hypocritical, but they really only have one principle — “blue good, red bad” — and they are never hypocritical about that.

Maybe someone should give those governors a puzzle or something so they have something else to do other than decide what items people are allowed to buy.

Trolls World Tour was cute, though it feels weird paying $20 for a rental. Kids are already rewatching it, though, so we’ll get our money’s worth.

If this coronavirus is really a big nothing and people are just playing it up, wouldn’t Trump have to be in on the conspiracy at this point?

I’m very resistant to looking at paying people who want to work but can’t as charity. So currently we have our housekeeper “on retainer.”
I mean, there is self-interest in this. I would prefer all the services and businesses I like to still be around when all this is over.

This pandemic is showing a failure of capitalism in that it requires people to work. Socialism is superior in that no one needs to work as everything is funded by heavily taxing five billionaires.

I listen to a number of econ podcasts, but I’m way behind so I’m currently listening to ones from early January. I’m excited to hear them catch up to where we are!

If journalists thought that one retweet meant Trump was planning to fire Dr. Fauci, then I can only conclude journalists are far dumber than the average American. If so, what’s the point of them?
I thought the point of them was to give us info we don’t know, but instead we’re the ones constantly having to educate them when they’re baffled by simple things.

I love my Baby Yoda tshirt, but it’s always trouble. Today, every time I tried to hand the baby back to my wife so I could get back to work, he’d start crying as he wanted to keep sitting in my lap and stare at Baby Yoda.

So what do I do with the coronavirus stimulus money? That’s a pretty big chunk of change, but so far my family hasn’t been financially affected by all this.

I think the president is really handling this well. I think the press is doing a great job holding him accountable. I think everyone else is knocking it out of the park in reacting to things in a calm, measured way. And if I can praise myself, I think I’m excelling at dry sarcasm.

Timothée Chalamet. Ansel Elgort. I don’t know where these names are coming from, but they need to stop.

The problem with direct deposit of the stimulus checks is that Trump misses an opportunity to send everyone a check with him smiling and giving a big thumbs up on it.

My main problem with Little House on the Prarie as a kid was I couldn’t get through the title without falling asleep. Hard to think of a more boring name for a show. Certainly doesn’t promise as much excitement as “Airwolf.”